34A) My Induction Method

I thought I'd share here my method for getting prepared for LD/OBEs. Over the course of time, and with my constant quest for new reading/learning, I have been able to improve the process.

As of now, this method seems to be the best for me. Everyone will have their personal preference for relaxation and visualization, but the key is to get into a proper mindset and 'body paralysis' mode.

I am not one who can take the time to 'nap' or meditate during the day, as life always seems to get in the way! What works best for me is the nighttime induction, because we all have to sleep at some point!

I try to get to bed by 10p, which will almost always guarantees a natural wake-up between 2-4am.

For me, the trick at that time is to NOT wake fully, to keep in that 'sleepy' mode, yet make my mind as alert as possible with visualizations and affirmations. Active visualization includes seeing energy (white light) entering the top of my head (on inhale) and exiting my feet (on exhale), and re-circulating back up and re-entering with each breath.

I do this for a few cycles, then reverse the energy flow so that the white light is entering my feet, exiting my head and re-circulating, all while concentrating on my breath in/out.

Once the energy is established, and I start to feel the 'fuzzy' sensations and lack of proprioception (fancy word to mean, "I can't feel my body!!" lol), that's when I start my affirmations.

I think using the affirmations keeps my mind from wandering and helps me to focus on anything EXCEPT my body. Be sure you are not too awake when you start, or you will get quite bored quickly with this!

For affirmations, I repeat the same two phrases over and over - "My mind remains aware as my body falls asleep" and "NOW I am out of body!" It is important to know that they are wordlessly repeated in my head, but WITH emotion and full of intent as if I know it is definitely happening here and now! There can be no 'wimpy' statements of intention!

Almost always before a 'loss of consciousness' into sleep, there will be a falling sensation that is my signal to remain aware and see what happens next.

Sometimes I try to induce the falling sensation with thought of climbing down a ladder, freefalling as in skydiving (although I've never done it!), or even visualizing flight as a bird over a canyon.

Again, I agree, the trick is to not get excited that it's happening, and just go with the flow. That does take practice!

Sometimes, I may lapse into sleep, but then the 'dream conversion OBE' may occur (as I have described here in my blog many times) where I become aware of an anomaly within my dream, and therefore become more aware and in control.

"Surrender to the experience" is a perfect description of any LD/OBE...no matter WHAT happens (visual, auditory, tactile, etc)...go with it, wait it out, and see what happens!

(I will be honest, the tactile ones are a bit freaky when you feel hands touching you...but always go with it, as you will find out the reason sooner or later! The auditory ones can be quite soothing - I've had waterfalls, children's voices, and singing at times...)

Also, one particular motion I feel many times as I start getting into the 'fuzzy' all over sensations is a circular movment around both palms...another indicator that I'm 'settling in' and getting ready to go. (I believe someone told me we have minor chakras there, but I'm not well versed in this)

Of course, another VERY important part of this,of course, is to record your experience that follows! I use a small recorder kept at my bedside and record immediately upon becoming awake. Waiting even a few minutes more will cause you to lose so many details!

34) Colors and Light

December 14, 2007 2:30am

I awoke at 2am and started with my visualizations and energy work. I must have drifted off….but then became aware of movement on my body, like someone was touching me, tracing a finger, moving energy. I thought ‘let’s keep it going’ so I affirm “Vibrations now!” hoping to be able to get out.

The affirmation didn’t do much except to make me more aware of the touching sensation/pressure moving, from my side to center and then came up to my chest. Once it moved to the heart area, I could feel great warmth spreading across my body.

I did recognize that slight ‘fear’ that I had to let go of because of the ‘touching’ sensations on my body. I could hear someone talking about colors as they moved fingers(?) around my chest, saying things like “more blue, green, yellow…red (It felt like they may have been describing what they saw?)

Suddenly there was a flash of white light all around me. My first thoughts were about ET’s, which I thought was strange because I rarely associate my experiences with them.

(I believe most ET encounters are only OOB type experiences that the self tries to put into a ‘believable’ circumstance – and that protecting yourself with white light prior will keep any malevolent energy at bay).

After the flash of light, I could clearly hear a voice speaking directly to me. The voice was male/female blend, and I remember saying to myself that I HAD to remember this! Unfortunately, I came away only with the basic theme which was something about ‘wanting you to live your life to the fullest without (limitation/disability)’. The exact words are not recalled, but the idea of enjoying life to the fullest was stressed.

They used other words, but I cannot recall exactly what...and there was so much more information given to me, but like the last time I heard this voice, I can only remember the general theme. You know when you are hearing them, it's VERY important...and you WANT to remember it, but somehow you can’t put it into words.

This entire episode lasted less than 30 minutes, and despite my best efforts to recall everything, I couldn’t! Words are not descriptive enough for the feelings I experienced. The basic idea, though, of starting to live life as I wish, doing for myself and what I want, fits into what's going on in my life now.

COMMENTARY:

Thanks to Kiauma of Saltcube for his valuable insight! - It is very common to hear words or sentences, and not be able to remember them afterwards. I think that often when we hear words but cannot recall it is because we really are not “hearing” words.

What is happening is our energy structure is undergoing subtle changes, what one would call 'active' information, which translates into how we live and interact.

It's not knowledge of the intellect we are hearing, but knowledge of the heart - we cannot remember because you really cannot express that kind of knowledge in words.

33) Learning about Walk-In's

I had an unusual 'dream' experience recently just before waking that I was not even going to record, but because it felt so 'real' I thought I would post it anyway to see what information I can learn from it.

It really wasn't much in the sense of 'travel' but more of an 'informational' experience.

I was in a 'bedroom' talking with my 'sister' but this person felt like it was my daughter's 'energy' yet she was my sister.

A third person in the room was just teaching us both about the 'walk-in' experience that happens...the one where a soul/spirit in body has decided to 'leave' and another 'soul/spirit' comes in to take over in that body.

(I am not very familiar with this experience only to read about it occasionally in various articles.)

My 'sister' in the room is in the top bunk of a bunkbed, and non-chalantly tells me, 'oh, that's what I did!' which completely floors me and I ask what she means by that.

She tells me to remember when she "was very little, about 2-3 years old, and had a very, very high blood pressure - and that 'Dad' had to wait for the EMS (emergency medical service) to respond? Well, when the pressure went over 300 (?), she left and I came in."

In this scene, I can recall that 'remembered' this experience clearly and that it was a distinct possibility since I knew she was very sick at that time.

I was so surprised (in the dream) to know that my 'sister' was a walk-in!

Now, in real life (at least this life!), there is no memory of such an experience. The only even close memory of such an event is when my daughter was age 2 having a very, very high fever (over 106 F!) and having to get to the hospital before any detrimental effects occured. There is no recall of my sister in this life being very sick when I was younger.

This is another unusual experience for me as I'm not even sure if it was a 'dream' or a past life recall, or what.

I'm not sure why I was shown this experience, but I thought I'd share it here for those who may not be familiar with this process.

More information can be found here: http://www.crystalinks.com/walk_ins.html

More Insight Re: #32 Post

Regarding the control issues and putting myself first, ....This 'letting go' is actually the 'intent' I expressed a desire for at the ceremony during the Buhlman workshop in September and have been working on since. (see entry #20)

I have had SUCH validation of this just in the past TWO days that all that has happened lately was for a reason in my life.

Without a lot of boring details, I was 'settling' for something that I really didn't want because I thought it would be best for everyone else.

(Hmmm, remember that last OBE with me letting go of the sunglasses everyone else wanted and sticking with the one I really wanted????)

Well, with a lot of 'letting go' lately and visualizations of my ideal situation, it has NOW come to pass!!!! The best part is, it all would not have worked out if I had not experienced EXACTLY what I did over the past few months!!

SO facinating!! I really don't mind telling you the details (it's work/school related) but I thought it would take too much space here. If you want particulars, I would be happy to let you know exactly HOW the Universe worked this all out for me!!

Life is working out SO GOOD right now...and I had to go through whatI did to get here!!!

New Format Now Started

I just thought I would let everyone know that I have started adding commentaries at the end of each of my experiences. In the last two blog entries I have added what I can recall as being significant to my learning experiences.

(For those entries already posted, I will add "and Commentary" to the titles so you can see that there is additional information you may not have read already added. Keep checking in to see which ones I add something to as time allows. For future blog entries I will not add this suffix to the title)

In this way, as readers of the blog, you can get a better understanding what my own interpretation and insight may be with regard to what went on. I also share many of my posts with other groups and often find valuable insight from them that I can add.

This was a great idea suggested to my by a good friend I met recently...and I am honored to have his acquaintance and assistance! Thank so much! (You may be able to guess already!)

32) New Experience – Not Sure What! (with Commentary)

12/01/07 5:18am awake

Being unable to sleep for several hours, I spent the time doing my usual induction routine, which I think I could share with you here. I always start by visualizing white light entering the top of my head and filling my body. I ask for protection and guidance from anyone who is at or above my level of energy.

I then did my usual energy building visualization with head to toe and feet to head movements. Once I realize I am about to fall asleep, I use the affirmations ‘my mind stays aware as my body falls asleep’ alternating with ‘Now I am out of body!’

The next I remember I am watching the walls of a hallway go past. These walls were red, and I was moving v-e-r-y slowly. It was then I became aware of my OOB state and realized that all I had to do was 'think' of where I want to be and I can be there faster!

(This was really a first - to become aware during an OOBE of remembering from a previous OOBE when I was told I 'do things the slow way' so it reminded me of how to move faster! - see previous post #31)

So I then think, "to the end of the hall", because I really didn't know where I was and what I was going to end up with! I did move very fast to the end of the hall, at which time I felt I was able to just 'take off'.

I began zooming up through floors (it was a high-rise type building with rooms on top of rooms) and remember seeing that all the rooms were the same, no matter how high I went! I felt something was not right, so I said something like wanting to go out, but then I started to move down through the floors to below where I started.

The rooms became more like a 'game room' of sorts, with the feeling of belonging to a younger energy with lots of game activities that could be played for fun in the rooms.

It was then that I experienced an unusual feeling, one of 'popping' through to another scene, but this scene felt so 'real', more so than where I had just come from. (It is tough to describe adequately the clarity and realness of this new environment - it's one I had never felt before)

I became aware of a 'tickly, creepy' type feeling on my right eye, which I then knew to be a butterfly landing. Wondering 'what's this?’ I see an individual in front of me dressed in an outrageous outfit, talking directly to me.

He is wearing a ?clown/jester? type costume, very colorful with one side yellow, one side white and sparkles all over. As he is talking to me, I feel apprehensive but not scared. He tells me I've been given the chance to "spin on the atlas" (apparently because of the butterfly landing on me.)

This entire `scene' I was in was nothing like I have ever experienced before. There was such a `reality' sense upon entering into this environment, but the individual I was interacting with was so `artificial' in the sense it felt so almost cartoon-like in a carnival type atmosphere.

This individuals attire was unusual enough but as he spoke to me, he leaned in to be sure that I noticed that his left eye was not actually an `eye' but a medallion or coin of some sort that glistened and got my attention.

Again, I was not scared, but I was not at all comfortable with his manner and 'artificial' energy. He pulls back, still reminding me I have a chance to "spin on the atlas", but I was not sure what that was or if I even wanted to do it.

He then explains that first I had to climb up these cage-like stairs, to a level where I found him making tea for me. It was a special tea, one that automatically knows exactly how you like it....but it was such a messy procedure that it left you with tea leaves all over the place.

Next, I remember I have these sunglasses with me, brought with me from wherever I just was. This individual says I could take HIS glasses also, which were very thick round ugly type glasses. I really didn't want them but knew they were more valuable.

So I turned to start coming back down the stairs within a cage, but I knew I really only wanted the sunglasses I came with. I met up with someone on my way down who saw I had the other ugly ones, and said to me `oh wow! You got the "adobo" glasses?...that's great!"

Despite their apparent value, I knew I didn't want them so I'm not sure if I gave them to him or just left them there. But I eventually went down with only the sunglasses that I really wanted anyway.

Funny thing, though, I was concerned that I was not going to get through the `airport' security with these sunglasses. I knew I was going to have to be careful in how I got them past security with them.

I remember then 'buckling in' the glasses for safe keeping and taking off.I was confident that even though I gave up the more valuable item, I stuck with the one I really wanted.

The scene then faded and I immediately lost that unusual `reality' feeling and woke in physical.

This experience was so unlike my usual ones that I am asking anyone who reads this to give me their impression as to what they may feel this was. Perhaps it was ‘just a dream’ but I don’t think so with that new yet unusual 'reality' feeling I had with it.

COMMENTARY:

This was a 'first' for me for a few parts of this experience. As I mentioned in the blog, just the fact that I was able to 'recall' an experience from a previous OBE was amazing, however, at the time it just seemed to be a natural occurence.

The altered energy feeling of that 'popping in' scene was also a first, as I've not felt anything quite like that before. The 'popping' feeling was new as well as the whole environment feeling so 'real'...I just have a hard time explaining the different sensations I felt.

In discussing this experience with others, a few symbolic meanings were mentioned that I thought I'd share with you. First of all, the butterfly....thanks to Holly of Flight_Plan, "Butterflies signify creativity, romance, joy and spirituality. You may be undergoing a transformation into a new way of thinking."

She agrees that when we are going through an important time of change in our lives, the divine realm tells us what we want to know through symbolisms in our dreams/obes.

Of course, it really did startle me a bit with it's landing on my face, but I'm sure that was to get my attention immediately....which it did!

Holly also made the cute analogy, "butterfly on your eye......I'm getting that it has to do with that you are going to embarking on a new outlook, a new way of LOOKING AT things!" which does seem appropriate at this time.

I'm sure there IS a bit of transformation going on with me....so much has occurred in my life over the past few weeks that I have been forced to just 'let go' and let the Universe take over.

Control is a big issue with me, and I have been shown that it is not a healthy way for me to live anymore. It's not that I am such an agressive control freak, but that I feel secure in keeping on top of everything.

The message for me has been to just 'know' that my needs are already being met in the most ideal and perfect way and to just 'let go' and enjoy life without constant worry about the future. I have to start putting myself first and stop doing so much for others is the other lesson I have had to learn the hard way lately...

This seems to fit with the fact that I 'stuck with' the sunglasses I really wanted at the end of the experience, despite the obvious value of the other glasses I gave away!

In retrospection, I also think that perhaps since I was going 'down' the floors in the beginnine into a more 'younger' energy with game rooms, perhaps there was a bit of regression going on, since the character I encountered was SO unusual! It was so much like a child-oriented costume that was almost comical!

31) Fun with my Guide (with Commentary)

Again, my first words on the recording I made was “it was so fabulous!” but I somehow knew as it was happening that I was not going to have full recall, but what I can recall still gives me such a wonderful feeling!

It’s been a rough few weeks for me in many ways and I had the intent I wanted to meet my guide, to know that I have this guidance, and that things will be ok.

I relaxed into the couch and remember getting the ‘floating’ feeling, so I try to raise my leg to see if it moves. It does so I roll over to get out, but this time I felt I had to pull myself out! For the first time, it was so hard to do! There was such a heavy pulling sensation back to the couch where I am lying. It felt as though part of me just wouldn’t separate!

I just kept pulling while I’m down on the floor, and then finally separated enough to quickly say “To the door!” at which time I felt lighter and moved away to the front door. I still couldn’t see (as always) and as I passed through the front door I entered a tunnel.

As I come out of the tunnel, I was up high over a ball game, with a beautiful nighttime sky above me. The stars were absolutely spectacular and remember remarking that I have never seen such a beautiful sky!

As I went down toward the ball field and surrounding areas, I make a mental note to remember what I was seeing, because somehow I knew that I was not going to be able to recall a lot of what was going to happen. I took note of the people walking around, the beautiful water fountains, and an old-fashioned fair-like atmosphere.

I then pulled back upward, to those beautiful stars, wanting to go see them. I thought of the moon and that I might want to go see that as well, but then when I looked, there were TWO moons, very huge, and very different in their appearance. I believe it was due to this unusual and unexpected double moon, that I no longer wanted to travel there.

It was at that point that I felt someone come up along side of me on my left. I knew it was a young man yet I couldn’t see him, I just felt him and could hear him talking. I remember saying ‘hey, you’re here! but I can’t see you!”

He says in a teasing, fun sort of way, “oh, you can’t?” I feel so joyous, so happy and carefree! I ask, “how come I can’t see you… I want to!” So to be funny, he kind of made his one leg with a boot on it appear at my side, and I remember laughing and saying ‘hey, no fair, I want to see more than your foot!”

I really don’t have much recall as to what and where we went next but I know I was with him the entire time, and we traveled far and wide. I did eventually get to ‘see’ him, but all I can recall is dark wavy hair, much like the one I have mention before. It was so much fun being with him.

There were a few details I could remember we did together. I remember at one point just flying around, and as we were traveling, and instead of going up and over a hill, I wanted to go through it so I did. I again could feel the chance in ‘consistency’ as I passed through it, just as I knew there were other ‘things’ I passed through on my travels.

In talking with him, he said something about his friend that he met his end with, and I felt like it was a car accident with his friend who was driving. I don’t think he actually told me this, but rather I ‘felt’ this information as it came from him. I am not really sure if he was talking about his own 'end' or his friend's, or even perhaps both.

Again I remembered I wanted to go to the moon and said to him, ‘Come on! let’s go!” thinking I'd like to take off and fly up there. I was surprised though, when he said to me (in a teasing, fun sort of way), “you always do it the slow way!” So I explain that I just love the freedom of movement and the feeling of flight that I have! (I am assuming the ‘fast way’ is the thought travel method, where you just think of where you want to be and you are!)

Another recall is being in a ‘factory’, but not really a factory (?) It had different rooms, and I met with so many different people! My guide took me through all these different places, and even wanted me to go meet the ‘hey girls’ (?), but I can’t remember much about who or what that was.

I remember seeing a pregnant girl, which made me think of wanting to see my (for real) soon-to-be grandbaby, but I somehow knew that it was ‘too late’ because the baby is “already there”. I saw pink fluff on floor, and everyone all around was watching the fluff as it sizzled on the floor!

Everyone there was doing something they enjoyed and it was such a fun atmosphere to be in. As I came back out into another room, I suddenly felt naked, and tried to hide behind a plant as a woman came by knocking on a window trying to get the attention of some other girls who needed to get a door open for her.

I also remember trying to get him to tell me his name (as I have done in previous travels!) and again he was trying to NOT have a name assigned to him. I was able to get some answer, but I think he said ‘Howie’ or something with that sound. I was a two part name but I can’t recall it. He really didn’t want me to have a name assigned to him anyway.

It was so just so much fun, and at the end I remember he told me I was to call him at a certain time (6 pm?). He gave me a phone number that I tried to memorize. It was some number like 1-800-CALLME with an extension that had my name in it (?). I felt if I could remember it then I could talk to him anytime. Of course, I forgot it.

The scene immediately went into another sequence that involved a bear and my sister, but because I now was aware I was ‘dreaming’ I actually made myself wake up to record this experience because I knew I was already forgetting a lot that happened!

In general, though, the goal of this experience was to have some sort of validation that I am not alone and that help is around. It’s not been a great few weeks for me, and just remembering all the fun and love that I experienced gives me back my more positive outlook on life and the validation that we are not alone in our journeys.

COMMENTARY:

One of the important aspects of this experience was to know that assistance is always out there when you ask with the intent of receiving an answer. Not just intent, but knowing it will occur. There is so much you can do with focused intent and confidence in its manifestation!

I have heard of others speak about difficulty in separating when going OOB, but this was the first time I encountered it! Way back in the beginning, I can remember having 'helping hands' to assist me which I think made it a bit easier for me to learn.

I am not sure why I had this difficulty at this time, but perhaps due to a recent health issue and getting off some potent medications, it occurred. However, I can certainly understand now the frustration that others express when one part of the 'body' won't separate completely!

The trick to learn if you encounter this, I think, is doing exactly what I did. Remembering that you have to focus your intent away from the body and completely accept the fact that you are already there after stating, "to the door!", then action always follows thought!

This 'guide' I encountered is someone I have met before (see blogs #17 & #22), and when I call him 'guide', I get the feeling of just that....someone who is at my level of energy to guide me wherever I need to go. I do not get the feeling of 'higher dimensions/energy' that some claim to have the fortune to meet, but I am still very happy to have him by my side!

There is always such lighthearted fun and excitement when he's around! Although I never feel specifically directed to certain aspects of an experience, I am sure he plays a key role in having me experience whatever it is I need to learn at that time.

A recurring theme I see lately is the feeling of nakedness that occurs within an experience. (also see blog #26) I am not sure if this is just my insecurities in having all my thoughts completely known to those I encounter in the astral realm, or if it is symbolic of my own insecurities in physical life.

This need for a name is also an issue with me, as I know I always ask for one! I have read that many times a guide will not give you one because it will then 'color' your perceptions of who (s)he is. That makes sense to me, but my control issues like to have a name!! lol

Lastly, I know I am always concerned that I will not be able to get in touch with my guides when I need them and so I think that is the reason I felt so adamant that I had to remember his 'phone number'. However, I am constantly being shown that all I have to do is ask (and expect) and help is always there!

30) Another Retrieval? LD but Not Aware

This was actually the second experience within the same night. I had gone to bed with the intent to 'go within' and/or assist in a retrieval. Little did I know that I would get both in the same night!

(The first was definitely 'Inward now!' experience, but it was very much a personal experience that I have not posted here since I don't feel it would be helpful to anyone but me...but then again, that's what 'going within' is for!)

November 18, 2007

First recall I have is of driving my former full-size van into the parking lot of our local bank/post office. Standing at the side of the building was a man who, at first, looked very much like my brother. He was just standing there, with a gas can placed at his feet, watching me enter.

Thinking this person could possibly be my brother, I pulled up next to him and asked if he needed a ride, thinking he was out of gas. I then realized this was not my brother when he said "Sure! I have to get to (name of nearby town)".

Now I’m a bit concerned as I am not in the habit of picking up strangers and giving them a ride. (I am not aware I am dreaming therefore do not have my usual ‘awareness’.)

I believe I said something like "oh, you’re not my brother, but I guess I still should give you a ride since I offered" and he indicated that he’d sure appreciate it.

So now I am trying to turn the van around to face the exit, backing up, and being very careful about my maneuvering since it’s such a large vehicle. As I turn back to see where I am going, I notice the man walking to the side of the car, putting on a motorcycle helmet. I think, ‘oh no, he’s going to want to put his motorcycle in the back of the van!’

Now I’m really concerned about giving this guy a ride, and the next thing I know, the man is yelling "watch out!" as I see him falling to the ground. Thinking I am about to run over him, I pull forward to move away and see that he is now irate, talking to a group of people who suddenly appeared around him, telling them all about this ‘crazy woman’ who tried to run him over!

I remember thinking, "well, this is not going to be something I want to stay around for" so I proceed to drive off, yelling back to the man that giving him a ride is not really a good idea at this time.

As I pull out of the parking lot onto the road, I look back (worried that he is still talking about me and that he may be injured on the ground), I am surprised to see that there is no one anywhere in the parking lot!

As I continue down the road, I am aware of a huge dust cloud coming at me, that fully encompasses the van I am driving. It is at this point I realize that I am 'dreaming' and the entire scene fades before I can do anything more.

In reflecting on this experience, I believe this may have been a ‘blind’ retrieval since I was not fully aware of what I was participating in, but the scenario fits the description of what I have read to be a retrieval. This man needed to have some intervention that would take him out of his ‘locked-in belief’ that he was still in physical and waiting for someone to help him.

Those who do not ‘cross over’ fully upon ‘death’ usually have such strong beliefs in their physical-ness that they are unable to see others in spirit who are always there to try to help him move on. Their very strong belief that they are still 'in flesh' do not permit them to 'see' anything other than what they 'think' is real.

My arrival was ‘seen’ by this man as I was more ‘physical’ (lower energy vibration) than his spirit helpers (due to my OOB state). This caused him to change his view of his current (stuck) situation enough to be open to the possibility of others coming to help, which therefore allowed him to 'see' his spirit helpers who assisted him to move on.

Although I would have liked to have been more 'aware' during this experience, in hindsight, I feel it still could have been a retrieval of sorts since I did eventually become 'aware' at the very end.

Perhaps if I had conscious 'awareness' during the experience, I may not have handled it the same way or in the right manner.

Anyone have any other thoughts about this experience?

29) Energy Work Pre-OOB

November 17, 2007

I had awakened early in the am by a phone call and then went back to bed, dozing in a lighter level of sleep. I recall that I was surprised to suddenly feel my legs being picked up together, moving up and down, and then in all different positions. Because of past experience with this same ‘feeling’, I knew this was the beginning of ‘getting out’ and just went along with whatever was happening.

I could feel ‘hands’ on different parts of my back and sides creating warm and tingly sensations and was given the thought that maybe this was not time to go OOB, as it felt as though some ‘energy work’ was going on.

At this point, I KNOW I am lying in bed, and am fully aware of ‘hands’ moving and working on my body. Next I heard the radio (so I thought) come on, and knowing my husband was next to me not moving, it made me think, “ no, it can’t be the radio or he would be doing something about it.”

So I listen to the narrator-like voice that is talking, trying not to move (because my legs are still being moved and hands are still working on my body). It was very difficult to make out the words, and I didn’t think to use the ‘clarity now’ because I wasn’t really sure what was going on. I do remember getting the feeling that the narrator was telling me what I need to do to ‘help my understanding’ but cannot recall exactly what was being said.

Next thing I knew I was pulled down by my feet, almost off the bottom of the bed! My husband then moves in bed, so I think, “well that’s it, it’s over, I’m awake.” I got out of bed and remember seeing a large amount of nuts and pieces of something all over the bedroom rug, thinking ‘good grief, why are these here?’ (My cue to become aware I’m OOB, but again, didn’t pick up on it!)

My husband got up to go to the bathroom, and I heard him say something about, ‘who put these here?’ and as I entered the bathroom to see what he was looking at, I realized there was water flooding the bathroom, with 2-3” of water on the floor and quickly heading out the door!

I ran to the phone to call for help, but had trouble dialing because I realized it was a new phone that my husband must have purchased as a surprise for me. I was eventually able to dial out for help, but then the scene faded and I was SO surprised to wake up for real in the bed, with my husband still sleeping quietly beside me!

This was an interesting experience in that it's been a long time since I 'felt' those hands on my 'body'. It happened quite regularly in the beginning, and I feel it is probably my 'otherworldly friends' assisting me to get back into the proper levels to continue on in my experiences.

28) Increasing Awareness

November 4, 2007 11:31pm

First recall was that it was Christmas time and I was going to show Santa how to fly again, reminding him how to do it, like it was something I did every year! It was then that I realized ‘hey, wait! I actually CAN do this’ so then I took off and I knew I was out.

Next I remember I was in my mother's house with my mother and two brothers standing around talking. Mom was cleaning something, going up high to get cobwebs out of an area near the ceiling, like a bookshelf.

I remember I was all over the room, flying up high, down low, all around, just smiling and enjoying myself because I knew they had no idea I was there but that it was so much fun going around to all different parts of the room.

The whole time I was out and going around the room, I had this ‘knowing’ that I could just ‘think’ in order to maintain being out. I just had to ‘think’ that I’m out so that meant I can do anything!

I remember thinking that because I’m out, I don’t have to ‘walk’ down the stairs, I knew I could just throw myself down the stairs and it wouldn’t matter because nothing could happen to me! It didn’t matter how I got down the stairs, so I decided I’d just jump down on my back because I knew I couldn’t get hurt. So I did!

It was the same ‘thinking’ that was going on while I’m flying around to parts of the room where they were talking, and I was just enjoying the fun and excitement of being out and KNOWING I am out!

At one point, as I ‘flew’ past my mother, I touched her back right calf and she jumped quickly and went “oh!” looking back to see what did that. I remember I was surprised to see that I could create a physical sensation on her!

I never realized I could create a physical sensation on someone ‘still in body’. Mom then attributed the sensation to the fact it must have been one of the cats brushing up against her. Later, I remember seeing one of the cats in the room and ‘skooted’ the cat to make her run quickly past Mom so she would be able to think it really was the cat that did it.

I remember that as Mom was talking to the boys, she got distracted and came down from the ladder from the area she was cleaning. She looked up to the spot and said something about ‘aw look, I didn’t even get all the cobwebs’, and at that point I flew up there and said, ‘don’t worry, mom, I’ll get them!’ I flipped my arm through them, despite knowing she couldn’t hear or see me but I was having such fun flying around and doing things.

This was another 'first' for me in that I was fully 'aware' of being out to the point that I knew I could not get injured. I find there is more 'awareness' of the difference in astral vs. physical being incorporated into my OOB experiences.

27) OBE vs. dream

Well, things have been busy here and I haven't been posting my recent experiences since I felt they were not as 'exciting' as many of them posted here.

However, in reading over what I wrote, I think that posting even those that are 'nothing special' may help others to see how their experiences compare. If even one person can be helped, then it will have been worth it. Please don't hesitate to share with me your own experiences, as I love to know that what I do helps others!

This 'dream' was probably a combination OBE/lucid dream:

October 28, 2007 5:51am

I became aware I was 'dreaming', but not sure I was really out of body as it felt like I could be, but the scene I was in was a familiar one I encounter frequently. I was driving my car very fast, trying to get home because it’s snowing and having to maneuver between snow banks that were built up on the sides of the road. I was thinking “I guess I have to be careful driving in case I’m really driving(!), but once I’m home I’m out-of-body!”

At that point I took off, pulled back quickly, floating up high, and I could hear a female voice singing something about ‘beautiful blue skies’ in a voice louder than I would have liked. It then became static and crackled and faded out.

My dog made some noise in the room, which brought me to more awareness but I could still ‘see’ in a central circle area my mother’s table, and my mother’s hands holding a baby… (I am expecting my first grandchild in a few weeks, this may be related.)

The next scene I remembered I was with two other women, a doctor I work for, and another guy who came up to us and said ‘if I had known you came from there, it would have saved me some work!’ Now he has to make beds and do some care...(?)

We are standing in a familiar place, an office of sorts, talking about ‘Nancy’ wanting to play something in 16 countries (I have no idea who Nancy is for real) and I remembered talking about the doctor having two cars – with the white one (which was the ‘good’ one) parked downstairs behind the office.

As you can see this has a lot of 'personal' issues interspersed, but the fact that I was not sure I was OOB, yet took the safe decision to drive carefully just in case I really wasn't, was an unusual occurence for me.

Life Goes On

I just thought I'd add a quick note to those who visit here regularly for updates. Due to 'life issues' and other concerns, there has been other priorities that I have had to deal with in the recent weeks.

There are still a few times I have recorded some 'dream activity' over the past weeks, but there is little that I feel would interest others. I may still find the time at some point to post them here, but for now, please keep checking back for updates.

I WILL be back in full swing as soon as I can! I INTEND it to happen! :-)

Karen

26) Inward Now! Finally!

Well, I am just SO excited about my experiences last night that I can’t wait to post them!

To the best of my recall this is my latest OBE experience – and it shows finally (!) that I was able to be SO in control of my conscious thinking that, for the first time, I remembered to do what Buhlman suggests to ‘go inward to the higher self’ to learn what needs to be known now. (Thanks Matt of Saltcube.com for the recent post where I responded to you by saying we all need to learn to do this for ourselves – it appears it was for my benefit too!)

I can remember that during the different stages of this OBE, I knew there was just SO much information being given that I was going to have some difficulty remembering it all. I affirmed to myself “I will remember all” at different times, but I still feel I have left some things out.

5:10am Sunday 10/14/07

“Absolutely awesome!” was my first words on the recording I made….

I was on the couch, where I go when I need more quiet than my sleeping husband can provide. (lol) During this entire experience, there were three times I thought I was physically ‘awake’, but each time, I just went along with whatever was happening to try to prolong my relaxation mode, only to discover that I was not awake, but still OOB within the dream state.

The earliest recall I have is a lucid dream where I was attempting to restart an old motorcycle that I had once had in my younger days. I did manage to get it started, but couldn’t find the switch for the headlight to turn it on. I wanted to take it out and try it again, despite its old, worn condition.

My father happened to come by (as the motorcycle was at his house) and showed me the switch and I remember thinking ,”wow, I should think about taking this more often to work, just for fun, like in the old days”.

I distinctly recall looking at the motorcycle and seeing a “grill” on the front of it…but not what you think! It was a full-sized barbeque (!) grill that was attached to the handlebars! I remember thinking I don’t recall it being there when I was younger, but oh well, it still works! (Might have been my ‘cue’ once again of an anomaly I was supposed to realize I was OOB, but it didn’t ….I just thought “oh well, ‘have grill, will travel!’” lol)

Then I became aware of being on the couch once again, and feeling the total relaxation and now soft vibrations. I don’t usually get these vibrations, but this time it gave me the knowing I was going OOB for sure. I waited for my ‘signal’ (a sensation that is difficult to describe, but more a knowing I was ready) and then climbed out of body. I was totally blind, as usual, and tried the ‘Clarity now!’ affirmation a few times, but without any change.

Standing by the couch, I was aware of stringy bubblegum-like strands above my head and hanging down from the ceiling. I remember pulling at these strands, feeling its texture (soft, gooey, exactly like stretched gum) and moving them away from me.

Moving through the living room, I was amazed at how clearly I was thinking while out of body, when suddenly I ‘bump’ into the different pieces of furniture! (Remember I can’t see anything!)

I was confused, knowing that I should be able to glide right through any objects, but was now “physically” bumping into things and having to go around them! I could feel the hard solid texture of the wood, so I figured, “wow, I must really be awake, and not OOB then”, but just continued on, hoping things would clear up.

I then recall the feeling that somehow I was standing there stark naked in my living room, but was aware enough to think, “oh I’m OOB so it doesn’t really matter”.

The next I recall going to the front door, feeling its metal door handle as I open it, and the heaviness of pulling it open. I am still not convinced I’m OOB, but I still just ‘play along’ with the scene. I step outside onto the front stoop, and feel a wonderful breeze blowing. (I love the wind!)

I then bump into my Labrador, who was sleeping on the front stoop. I apologize profusely for forgetting to bring him last night, give him a big hug, and come back inside the living room with him. All this time, I still cannot see anything, but yet I am not certain of my physical status.

I remember trying to ask for ‘clear vision’ but not wanting to use those specific words, as I knew that it wasn’t really a physical ‘visual seeing’ that I wanted. I am amazed at how clear my thoughts were at this time, knowing that asking for the wrong thing may chance waking me.

Now I go back to the area I where I was ‘sleeping’ and now suddenly realize I CAN see, but what I see is surprising. The furniture is now missing, there are splotches of ‘something’ all over the floor and walls and it’s all in disarray! I think, ‘oh my gosh, what happened here? What’s going on?” and then I realize this is my signal that I am indeed OOB and that I can do what I want to do. I think to myself, well, I have to do something constructive this time…and then remember that I want to ‘go inward, to my higher self!’

I stood in the center of the room, said, “Inward now! To my higher self!” just as Buhlman tell us to do. It took just a few seconds to feel movement, and I thought I’d ‘help it along’ by lifting my feet and starting to twist. lol

Immediately I felt the sensation of travel through a long, long, long black tunnel, with the end of the tunnel (a speck of light) always visible as I moved.

I feel so safe… it’s quiet, comfortable…and I end up in this blackness, feeling like I’m floating. It’s fluid-like, soft, comforting, and peaceful. I could feel my astral hands separate (I was holding my hands together) and drift apart, floating. (I am wondering if I am in the womb, as this is what I felt it would be like)

I then hear the sound of music and voices singing softly, melodiously. I try to listen to the words to see what they were saying, and at the time, I knew what the words were, but cannot now recall what they were singing.

The next thing I am aware of is my daughter coming into the room where I was ‘sleeping’ and trying to talk to me!! Again, I am just not sure if this is actually happening or not, so I just half-listen to her tell me about something and trying very hard NOT to fully wake from this fully relaxed state. (In hindsight, this did not happen at all in physical reality – but may have been to see if I would awaken with this type of interruption)

That scene faded and now I recall hearing my husband come into the room. I was so aware that it was him coming, and disappointed to think that I will definitely have to fully awaken now. Again, I just have the feeling I should ‘go along’ with it, and see what happens.

He comes to me and cradles my head in his arms and starts talking to me, softly, but in a different voice than he has now! While I’m listening, I know my arms are wrapped around his head and I can FEEL his hair. Somehow I know that he’s talking to me, but it is after I have died! (I remember thinking initially, “oh, so I guess I’m going to die before him in this life!”)

Then realize he is different somehow, and that this has to be a past life! He is saying he’s sorry he drifted away from me over the past years, that he truly loves me very much and hopes he will be able to spend many more lifetimes together with me. He was so sorry it was so late for him to finally tell me this. I could feel it in his voice, and yet knew I was lying there in repose after death and these were his last words to me! It was very touching….

This aspect of him gave me a new perspective on some personal issues I am dealing with; hence I feel the importance of this experience. Going within when OOB is what I will be doing on a regular basis from now on!

In looking over my OBE experiences as they have progressed over the past year, I can now see a trend where I have had to first learn the process of going out of body and then become familiar with its abilities. Learning to control thought and desires is a key element of the astral realm as ‘thoughts are things’ and you need to learn the basics before proceeding with more advanced abilities.

It is just so difficult to truly explain how it feels once out of body and the change in your mentation, that I can only best describe it as a KNOWING of certain things as you encounter them. Learning to just ‘go along’ as I did with the THREE times I thought I was awake in this experience allowed me to get to the learning piece.

I just wonder how much I was not able to recall and what more I could have learned!

25) Why Do I Do This?

I am currently reading Cosmic Journeys by Rosalind McKnight and have come across information that so impressed me that I want everyone to know about.

You have all heard that ‘thoughts are things’ and ‘intent is everything’ and these are two mottos that I cannot emphasize enough when learning to travel out of body. I am still learning how to ‘think’ properly when in the OOB state since the infinite vastness of what we really are is such an abstract concept for the physical mind to understand and grasp.

The reason for all this work in exploring other dimensions of the universe is best described as written in her book:

“the basis of training (learning to go within) is to get into the free flow of our own existence and to explore the limitless boundaries of the higher universes – all residing with each being…..there is no time and no space.….

A special flow of energy is released when you work on the assumption that there are no limits in the human communication system. Those who are able to get freely into the flow of their own existence are able to get into this limitless level of communication that exists outside of what is considered time and space.” (end quote)

It is up to us to discover for ourselves where we can go in this limitless universe. It is only by getting into this 'special flow of energy' that we are able to release limiting thoughts and beliefs and fully experience that which is our true reality.

(Interesting to note: The words "limitless boundaries" is really an oxymoron, you can't have both!)

Although she spoke in terms of the 'human communication system', it really relates to ALL aspects of the universe. There are NO limits....

24) Into the Earth

I awaken on my own at 2:30am as per my usual routine anymore. Unable to fall asleep in bed, I moved to the couch in the living room. After a short time of affirmations and visualizations, I could feel the ‘sinking’ feeling that signals I’m getting ready. I then heard the sounds of music, conversation, and chimes and then realized my left arm was already floating above my head!

So at that point, I just ‘climbed’ out and over the couch and found myself floating next to it. It felt different this time, less of a physical feeling, and more of a formless float. There was no heaviness and I realized I was ‘blind’ again (this almost always happens upon first exit) so I just thought ‘clarity’ and I could see.

I am above my living room, could see my dog next to the couch and said to him, “hey Buddy, come on, let’s go!” I headed for the side door and then found myself no longer in control of the scene. I entered into a hallway, with a familiar flooring and walls, thinking it was a school corridor. It was empty and I wondered where to go and what to do.

I did remember to say ‘awareness now!’, but it was without much help. I still had no idea what to do. I saw that the floor now had splotches of water on it, leading into another corridor, and I knew it was leading to an indoor pool area. I had the choice of going right or left, chose right, and continued on to poolside. There I floated above this group of teenagers who were talking and paying no attention to me at all. I moved on out to another room, but this one was a market of sort where there were displays of necklaces, jewelry, and other things for sale.

People were all around, and at this point I realize I really should try stop and talk to someone to ask them a question. Of course I couldn’t remember exactly what I wanted to ask! I tapped this one heavyset older woman on the shoulder and I think I asked something like “where are we?” and “what’s going on?”

I distinctly got the impression she was a bit grumpy, that I was imposing, and gave me some answer like ‘you should know where you are or you don’t belong here!’ I apologized for bothering her and moved on. On my way out, I saw a bartender-like person behind a counter, thought of asking him (since bartenders always know what’s going on! lol), but he paid no attention to me either so I just moved on and went out the door.

I awoke 4:15am IP and wondered what a boring OOB this was with no one to interact with, yet was intrigued by the new light feeling I had initially when OOB.

Back in bed, I was reflecting on the information I read just last night that made an impression on me. I had read a part in the book Cosmic Journeys by Rosalind McKnight and her adventure into earth consciousness by actually traveling inside the earth while OOB. I was fascinated with her experience and remember thinking it’d be interesting to see what that was like. Little did I know that I’d be given that opportunity so quickly! (My lesson: Watch what you ask for!)

After returning to bed and more affirmations, I found myself flying high around the earth, swooping up and down, just enjoying the freedom of movement. It was at a point when I was very high above the earth and looking down, I decided I wanted to nosedive straight down directly into the earth! (I remember I had perfect dive form…hands out in front and toes pointed - I was amazed afterward of my lack of fear! lol)

As I entered the ‘ground’ I could feel the different texture change along my whole body as I was entering and immediately found myself in a black void. I stopped, not wanting to go inside ‘too deep’ and just floated around in this void.

No noise, no nothing…I knew where I was and tried to feel a connection with the earth, but I think I already had started to generate a twinge of ‘fear’ by not wanting to go too deep. It was peaceful there, but my thoughts were about how I was going to get out and if I could.

I felt a bit of anxiety thinking I was ‘under the earth’ when I suddenly found myself in another environment. I think the physical body fear creeping in is what caused me to leave and not have the full experience I wanted.

Now I found myself in this clinic-like area where these people are living while they learn to deal with their ‘addictions’. As I’m ‘walking’ around and talking with the residents, I watch as a middle-age disheveled blond man enters with a cigarette in his mouth. The other residents immediately yell at him to get rid of the cigarette as it is forbidden here. He throws it on the floor next to where we are sitting and I was concerned for a few seconds about a fire, but was able to remember ‘it’s all astral’, so no concern.

I am just going around talking with different residents, all in varying degrees of mental disability and scruffiness, but I just cannot recall what I am talking about! I do remember one resident telling me to be sure to bring her ‘something’ when I came out. I just went from room to room talking and as I was getting ready to go out to the foyer area, I remembered I was supposed to bring this one resident something she asked for. I couldn’t remember what it was! I saw this lighter on a side table and said, ‘oh, it’s probably that’ and picked it up.

In the foyer, the residents are lining up for snacks and drinks, and I see a (current) friend of mine at the table buying something. The woman who wanted me to get her something was there and was scolding me that she asked for a ‘soda’ not a lighter (since cigarettes are forbidden! yikes, what was I thinking! lol) My friend said for me not to worry, that she took care of buying her a soda so all is well.

At that point, I was awakened by an alarm and quickly found myself back on the couch. I have no idea why I was at a ‘rehab’ clinic, but I was sure doing a lot of talking. I get the feeling that perhaps I was learning how they came to be stuck in their addictions.

Again, the most amazing part of this three part OBE is the adventure into the earth. I have obviously released the ‘belief’ that there are boundaries to what we can and cannot do. Part of the reading in the book that I felt especially connected to related to the fact that there are no boundaries to what we can do. As it is said, you are limited only by the extent of your imagination, and even then, there are those ‘helpers’ who will show that even our imagination can be stretched!

23) OBE - Feeling Through Objects

I thought I'd share some of the numerous experiences I have from my dream journal that I have not yet transcribed into a posting. It is so interesting to see how I have progressed and what is possible with just a little intent and determination! Anyone CAN do this if I can!

April 6, 2007 7am

This experience was recorded in my dream journal back in April and to this day, remains vivid in my mind. I remember prior to this OBE, telling the Universe that I wish to be able to feel what it was like to go through physical objects while OBE. This experience allowed me to have that awareness for the first time.

I was in that semi-awake stage in early AM and was able to get the ‘feeling’ of going out by thinking of driving my car with my husband next to me. I remember him putting his arms around me and curling into his embrace (while driving!).

I realized then that I was losing control of the car around a very sharp left turn as the car continued to go straight! I could tell I was talking off by the increasing roaring sound in my ears, and then hearing waterfalls and children’s voices.

The sounds continued to build, and I was aware enough to think “out of body now!”, saying, “ok, I will now get to see my body in bed because I’m out”. Again I was not able to do so as I immediately was pulled backward very quickly down a dark black tunnel.

(In the beginning as I felt I should be able to see my body in bed, but now realize that it is such an insignificant part of the OBE experience, especially since it always brings me back to body!)

I arrived at the entrance to a resort-type area, floating above the area in something like an inner tube, very relaxed, and feeling something soft in my hands to hold onto. (It felt like the same material I was wearing for an eye mask at that time). It was a comforting feeling, floating in the yard outside a large mansion, following a stream as it coursed down the edge of the yard. It was really beautiful.

I could see the water swirling as it moved, and it thought it’d be fun to go put my feet in the water. I immediately ‘heard’ a voice saying something about the ‘water is too….?’ So I just said ok, whatever, I don’t have to do that and continued on.

The trees and the landscape was beautiful as I floated up to the house, and I could ‘hear’ voices describing some sort of ‘instructions’ to me as it got closer. The voices were very muffled and difficult to hear, so I think “I can’t hear you!” It doesn’t help at all (in hindsight, I should have said ‘Clarity now!’), but I do recall hearing something about “nobody refuses….” or something like that, meaning that no one comes here except by their own free will and that no one is forced to come here.

Now I’m about 10-15 feet above the ground heading for the main entrance which is a large doorway, very elegant, and got the feeling that this is a ‘resort’ place where you go to have fun. I go into the house, see a beautiful winding staircase, chandeliers, and just elegance all around.

I am under that staircase and now realize that I wanted to be able to watch as my hand goes through a wall. I moved to the wall by the stairs, and pushed my hand into it. It disappeared into the wall, and I pull it out quickly, saying “Wow! I can do it!” I put it back in, felt something unusual (like a wall stud?) and realized it was only the different textures I was feeling. I remembered at that time to thank the Universe for allowing me to do this since it was a goal I had asked to obtain.

Now I float into a sitting room of sorts, and can see ‘people’ all around, realizing they are only spirits since some of them are not fully formed (can only see parts of them). They are all having a good time and there was a woman (receptionist?) at the desk.

As I stood there to ‘check in’, I could see off to my left a group of people who were practicing singing, like a choir would do. Interesting to note, they were all in black in white only, so I smiled at the receptionist and joked about “oh, is it black & white day today?” The receptionist was wearing colors, though, and without speaking to me, floated away with me following her. Just as we passed by this ‘black & white’ choir, I lost the feeling and found myself back in my body in bed.

I was so aware that this was real, and not a dream, that I recorded it immediately and then feel back to sleep asking how I was going to help others doing this OBE stuff.

I immediately became aware of a vision of four people standing around my bed, looking at me. I am fully aware I am lying in bed, looking up, and seeing the environment around me change, yet it registered to me as a normal occurrence so I wasn’t concerned.

The first person I saw was a young woman with a pillbox type hat and a 1960’s look – short dark straight hair, felt like a stewardess-type – very pretty. As I see them looking down at me in bed, I say to myself, “oh, I can’t let her see me!” so I look away. She faded away, but again it made me aware enough to realize I’m ‘awake’ yet lying in my bed.

On my left is a young boy, a grandmother-like figure next to him, and on my right was a mother-figure, and closest to me on my right was a young girl. It was the boy I felt the strongest connection with - approximately age 7-8, sandy short hair, cute – and the girl had short, dark straight hair. She leaned over me to get close, looking intently at my face, and the feeling I got was that she was saying, “oh, I like her!, we’ll do fine with her, she’s nice!” I distinctly got the impression they were ‘checking me out’ and I woke IP immediately afterward.

22) Control Issues in Direct OBE

5:50am September 24, 2007

Woke around 4am and couldn’t sleep, so I went to couch to where it was quieter. I did affirmations and visualizations for a short time and must have fallen asleep.

Without a lot of recall as to exactly how, I remember finding myself standing next to the couch and knowing I had to move away from my body to think clearer. I said “to the door!” and surprisingly, felt I was being pulled in a totally opposite direction than I thought the door was! (Now I realize my orientation was off due to the 360 degree view you get OOB!)

I was being pulled backward through blackness, no longer feeling in control of the experience. The next I knew I was with young man (longer sandy blond hair, Nordic-looking, smiling) and riding in something that had these small windows you could see out of.

He was someone new to me, and again, just off to my left. I asked for his name and just like the other times when I am with someone, he responds but I don’t understand at first. I ask again (as I have this terrible need to know names!) and he says, with a smile, “Tangible” (but pronounced with a ‘tahn’ sound in the beginning).

(In reviewing my experience, I can see that this may have been just any ‘name’ to give me something ‘tangible’ to use so I’d stop asking him!)

Now I could see the outside of my house from up in the air, realizing I’m still moving backward away from this location. I couldn’t see very clearly yet I didn’t have the awareness or control to use “Clarity now!” that has always worked before. However, I was very much aware that I was out of body and moving very fast.

We stopped in a place I felt was a ‘station’ of sorts and now ‘Tangible’ is just relaxing while I get the chance to look around. There is another girl there, also relaxing, and I get the feeling she too is waiting for her ‘charge’ to look around, as she has a similar feeling as ‘Tangible’.

I stopped to talk with her and she asks me a question about her son/daughter(?) who had inward turned feet and if it was fixable. (I felt that my being a nurse she somehow thought I’d know – it’s interesting to note that the feeling I got from both the girl and ‘Tangible’ was not that of a highly advanced soul, but one that was ‘working’)

I told the girl that to fix the feet it was usually just a surgical correction, and with that she immediately looked up in a book the address/numbers (I remember 9-1-??zipcode?) of a doctor’s name (started with P..). She said “good, then I will send her there for a job and he’ll take care of it getting the feet corrected”.

At this time, another woman, (someone familiar to me but I still can’t recall who it was) came into the ‘station’ and was very worried and concerned, saying “you’ve got to come talk with me, and we can’t talk here” as she lead me out a side door.

Just as we were going out, she said to look first and see who’s in the sink(!?) As I look into another part of this building I can see my brother sitting in big kitchen sink area, thinking, “Oh now what’s he doing in the sink!” I can feel there was a lot of drama tied up around him and her, and that somehow they needed to have this drama in their lives. I felt as though they were trying to get me pulled into it with them.

At this point, I cannot recall what exactly happened, but I found myself coming back to the couch area, and I was aware enough to know I didn’t want to ‘go back’ yet. This was the first time ever I was able to keep from returning to my body, trying to keep the moving sensations going to stay out of body. I knew I was only a few inches above my body, and was concentrating on not returning.

At the same time, my son Stephen appeared (not in real ‘physical’ reality), walking into the living room (where I was) and he was saying, “wow, it’s really cold in here!” as he walked right past me to a chair that was next to the couch. I am still concentrating on staying out of body and not fully waking, so I just ignored him, despite the noise he made.

Finally I was able to roll out quickly from the couch area, almost landing on top of him where he sat! I am fully aware I am out of body, and again I just automatically took off to another area without conscious control again. (or at least to the best of my recall)

I moved into this room, a kitchen-like area, with a mother and 3 girls. The mother was short, stocky, and she had 3 daughters. One was about 18 months old in a high chair, the other two were about 5 and 9 years old.

The mother was showing me this beautiful toy baby carriage that she would love to have for her girls, but I felt she was not able to obtain it for some reason. (The carriage was right there, but it wasn’t hers?) She was saying, “oh, wouldn’t Margaret love to have this!” and as I’m listening to her, I know I’m supposed to remember the name Margaret to use and that I had to get them to go someplace, to leave this room.

I told the mother that I saw this same baby carriage in a local store for a very reasonable price, that that I’d go with her to pick one out. She was very hesitant and didn’t want to leave, not sure if she should go, so I added that it would be a great Christmas present for Margaret and that she should get a head start on her gifts now so it will be easier closer to the holidays.

The impression I got was she finally agreed and was going to go with me as the room faded and I found myself wide awake back on the couch.

Upon awakening, I do recall that there was a lot more activity that happened throughout this long experience, but it faded from my memory so quickly I could not remember it all.

I do know I was definitely out of body, but without a lot of control, just going along with whatever I was being shown. Again, this was an OBE not from a dream conversion as I usually have so it was interesting to see that I lost a lot of recall and did not have the control I usually do.

21) OBE during Workshop

I had the great fortune to be attending the workshop given by William Buhlman in Maine over the past weekend, and want to share with you the experience I had the first night there.

With affirmations and visualizations given as ‘homework’ for the night, we all went to bed, hoping to wake after a few hours of sleep to begin again with the intent of experiencing an OBE.

I awoke on my own at 2:22am (a good sign for me with the numbers!), and after getting up a few minutes, I went back to bed to start the affirmations and visualizations again. After a while, I had apparently fallen asleep, but my mind registered the feeling I was still awake, as it felt like just a continuation of what I had previously been doing!

Now I am listening to all the running water from the other rooms (this was an old restored mansion we were staying in) from what I assume was the other participants who were also up in the middle of the night also attempting to do their ‘homework’.

So, I’m listening to the running water, wishing I’d just fall asleep or OBE, and suddenly felt the air around me become electrically charged, warm and tingling. Looking at the small TV in the corner, I somehow ‘knew’ that it was going to turn on all by itself, and no sooner than I had that thought, it DID! (Remember I said I felt I was awake, but as you will see, I apparently was not!)

That freaked me out a bit, but I didn’t do anything, thinking “Well, I’ll just lie here and not move to see what happens”, as I know the key to success with OBE’s is not to do anything about unusual happenings in the night.

So, the reminder for you here is that I usually have dream conversions where I see/hear/feel something unusual in a dream and then am able to become ‘aware’ that I’m dreaming. This allows me to just roll out and get OOB.

Now, I’m assuming my ‘higher self/guiding spirit’ realized I wasn’t going to do anything about this anomaly (because I thought I was AWAKE!), so when I looked at the clock on the bedside stand, it said 7:47 am! When I saw that, I quickly ‘rolled out’ of bed as I thought I was going to be late for breakfast at 8am!

Now I’m standing by a fireplace near by bed in my same physical room surroundings (fireplace is NOT there in real life, but area where one would have been is), getting undressed to get ready for breakfast. I remember pulling a sock and then a snowmobile boot off my foot (again, I should have realized this anomaly as a trigger to becoming aware within the experience - as I don’t usually wear snowmobile boots with socks OVER them to bed!)

As I stand up and look off to my left, there is a young man standing there – non-confrontational and smiling – but rather startling to see as I think I’m getting undressed! He’s about 18-22 years old, has a left eye that is deformed/lazy in some way, dark hair, and is wearing a blue cotton shirt. I immediately get the feeling that he’s here to clean the room.

Again, I’m thinking I’m really awake and this is just a bit more that I want at this time, so I yell to him, “get out!” Just before he fades, he hands me a rag-type item that I get the impression of the words ‘soot cleaner’ with. (I guess he just wanted to clean the fireplace!)

I then feel the quick pull back to bed, and wake up for real at 4:21 am, with nothing but peaceful quiet throughout the room. (No TV, no running water)

This 'false awakening' sensation is a bit more frequent now in my experiences and I wonder if it is my attempts at becoming OOB while NOT in a actual 'dream' state.

20) William Buhlman Workshop + addendum

To all my new friends and co-participants in the William Buhlman Workshop held 9/21-23, 2007 in Poland Springs, Maine –

Welcome to my blog!

Thank you all for being a part of a most informative and exciting weekend and for sharing all of your experiences.

I wish you all the very best in life, with much love and happiness - and want to remind you all that INTENT is everything - you CAN do it and you WILL!

Please keep me informed of your successes, sharing the learning process is so important; I know you CAN DO IT!

All my best to you all, and HAPPY TRAVELS!,
Karen

Addendum: 10/9/2007

I thought I'd edit this post to include a description of the workshop and all it included for those who may get a chance to hear William Buhlman speak. This was such a phenomenal weekend for me, sharing thoughts and experiences with those of a similar mind. It was worth it just for that!

It was a very special time, spending the weekend away from home to go bask in the 'energy' created by being with those who share the same thoughts and desires. William Buhlman was a fantastic speaker, one who spoke easily and intelligently, in a very down-to-earth manner. (no pun intended! lol)

Day One started Friday evening, where we went through some introductory lecture and guided imagery sessions. The meditative sessions are all designed to show different techniques of going OBE and to expand our awareness of other dimensions by using the mind to create our experiences, and not rely on physical senses.

William Buhlman gave some background in beliefs and blockages, and how they interrelate with our progress in learning to go out of body. He described affirmations and intentions and how they can be used. We were shown a basic progressive relaxation technique to start , and then later we experienced his 'target' method meditation in which he guided us through a room in our house to pick out five objects to 'sense' fully in our minds.

We were then given 'homework' to do that night, to practice using this technique. (See my next post #21 for the result of my homework!! lol)

Day Two we covered more techniques, as well as lectures on various OBE adventures and issues that were a concern for the participants. We started with a 'hot air balloon' visualization, where we had to 'let go' of the heavy ballast weights that were weighing us down. These weights symbolized our 'beliefs' that no longer served us and needed to be released.

We did a 'stretching' technique where we visualized our etheric body extending more and more above and below ourselves.

In another imagery attunement, we sat 'eye to eye' with a partner for a few minutes and shared any feelings and/or images that occurred. (That one was interesting...first time ever I actually 'saw' my partner change into something else..but that's another story!)

We then were taken on a past life regression and shared our different experiences. In the evening, we held a fire ceremony outside that he learned in Peru which enabled us to 'release' more blockages and 'manifest' our deepest desires.

Afterward, we went through another meditation where we became a great bird, flying and enjoying our new found freedom high in the mountains.

Day Three started with more lectures, including the similarity between UFO abductions and OBEs. We learned about working with the higher self and opening the chakras.

Two final techniques we did included the creation of an energy body, where we visualized the formation of a second energy body above us and tranferred our consciousness into it. Lastly, he taught us his 'rope' technique to pull yourself out of body, as explained in his book.

These were three of the best days I have spent, just learning and absorbing the great energy there and making new friends. Mr. Buhlman is such a good speaker, you can't help but be captivated! He will get you motivated to do more than you ever thought you could! Anyone who gets a chance to go hear him speak should definitely go.

Hmmm, this sounds like an paid advertisement, but its not....I did enjoy this workshop that much!! lol

19) Movie Lot waves

2:30am 8/19/07

This was written a few hours after waking, as I can still remember major points. I wish I had recorded it! I remember thinking at the time that it wasn’t that ‘significant’ a dream but again, in full waking state, I realize it just may have been!

Was in a ‘movie lot’ of sorts, gathering people to come watch ‘the show’ that was going to start. I knew all about what was going to happen and wanted others to watch the event. We lined up along a wall on one side of the lot, and then the ‘show’ started. It was really nothing more than a wall of water that exploded out of the center hill area and swirled all over, filling the entire lot with waves of wild water. To me it felt refreshing and exhilarating!

It got to the point where it was going to start filling up the area where we were sitting, but I knew that it would only get to be about ankle level, so I already had my shoes off so I could enjoy putting my bare feet in the water. The others sitting with me were frightened and worried that the water was going to be washing over and engulfing us. I knew that wasn’t going to happen, so I just said, ‘stay, wait and see because we are safe’.

At one point I stood and looked over to another ‘movie lot’ across the way and saw more activity and water movement, knowing that this was going to be ‘part 2’ of the movie and that others were there now going through it, so I had to wait for our turn. I was excited for some reason, knowing that ‘part 2’ was going to be even more ‘fun’ than this part one I was at!

18) Finally! OOB in the near-physical again

5:44 am August 26, 2007

It's been a long few weeks with only intermittent, yet still symbolic, dreams occurring. I have not been sharing them here as I think they would probably be not as interesting to others who would not be able to relate to them as I do.

However, I will share another definite out-of-body experience, even though it is nothing as exciting as some of the ones here on the blog.

My first recollection that I was dreaming involved a short dream sequence that had my daughter coming upstairs to see me while I was 'sleeping'. I remember her asking me for permission to let her go to the SuperBowl, which immediately made me realize, 'hey, this is not right.....she is not home tonight, and she would never want to go there....', which was my key that I was now 'dreaming'.

Becoming aware I was in this 'altered' state (mind awake/body asleep), I then tried to see if I could move my astral arms and legs. It took a few minutes of wriggling around, but I soon was able to feel them move, so I concentrated on "out of body now!" while attempting to roll out. On the second try, I found myself standing at the side of the bed, feeling a bit wobbly, in complete darkness, and with a lot of 'heaviness' surrounding me.

Surprisingly, I could feel my pet Labrador's head pressed against my right leg (as he usually does when he wants my attention) and wondered how he could really be there. I didn't take the time to focus on his being there, since I was concentrating on moving away from my body.

I was thrilled to realize I was 'out', and remembered to say 'clarity now!' to get my vision improved. To get moving, I said 'to the door!' and glided to the door and out into the hallway. As usual, the farther I got away from my body, the less 'pull' and 'heaviness' I felt, and was able to maneuver better.

I went down the stairs to the living room, and stopped there wondering, 'what am I going to do now?' I realized I could still feel my pet's head pressed against my leg, so I took a second to scratch his head and thank him for being with me. Again, I didn't spend too much time wondering why he was there because I felt it would 'awaken' me too much.

It's been a long time since I was able to get into the near-physical with familiar surroundings, so I was not really prepared as I should have been with a planned objective for travel.

Looking out the window on my left, I said 'to the outdoors!' and then felt myself pass through the wall into the backyard. Again, I realized my vision was not as clear as I wished, so I again said, 'clarity now!', with little effect. I was able to remember then to state, "I see clearly now!" which immediately cleared my vision. Interesting to note, once I was outside, I could no longer feel my dog at my side.

I could see the trees and houses next door, and then turned to look up into the nearest tree. I thought I'd like to feel the leaves and see from the tree top so I glided up gently, enjoying the freedom. I felt the unusual texture of the leaves, and was able to see my backyard in a full-view panorama from the treetop.

It was so exhilarating and exciting for me to be out again! Unfortunately, something caused me to feel that 'return to body' sensation and I awoke in bed immediately.

I know this is really a 'nothing' experience in terms of doing something constructive, but it did give me the assurance that I have not lost my ability to OOB and will still be able to work on achieving more in the future.

17) Robot Factory

Since it's been a bit of a 'dry' spell for me at this time, and I had the time to review past experiences, I thought I'd share another experience from a few months ago that had the same familiar male 'guide' with me whom I still have yet to learn his name! As always, he is just behind me and talking to me, making me feel so comfortable, happy, and lighthearted!

4/22/07 5am

I am lying in bed, aware of an opening in my eyes, like a little hole I could see out of, and then it became like I was looking through a ‘windshield of a car’ again. The opening would close, then open slightly, and close again and I would work on trying to pry it open fully to ‘full screen’, which eventually it did.

As it opened I was looking at what appeared to be the side of a road as I am passing by, with little yellow flowers along an embankment of sorts, which allowed me to become more aware that I was ‘going out’. Upon this realization, I opened wide to a full countryside area and I said, “Take me to where I need to go to learn”.

Immediately I felt drawn backward through a black tube-like tunnel, very quickly, where all was quiet for what felt like a long time. (Was long enough that I was able to remember thinking, ‘wow, this is a long time in this tunnel!’ lol)

As I became aware of my surroundings, I felt I was high up in the air and someone was with me. It appeared to be a sort of ‘robot/mannequin’ factory where there were these lifelike mannequins or robots lined up on a hook on a cable high in the air. They were being transported somewhere, and I could feel something ‘hook’ me as I held onto one of the mannequins.

I am riding this cable down an assembly line and ride along as it curves to the left. I get off and again fully aware that someone was with me. Now I had to go into the building carrying this robot/mannequin with me. As I move toward the building, I realize this male figure is with me, talking about ‘us’ and ‘them’, telling me something I can’t fully recall. I remember asking him twice “Us?” wondering who he meant in talking about ‘us’. He tried to explain but I couldn’t figure out who the ‘us’ was, knowing ‘them’ was the people who made the mannequins.

He was behind me, and I started to go down a flight of stairs, awkwardly and with difficulty, carrying this robot. Just before I started to down the steps, I said, ‘Wait! I want to know who you are, I want to see you!’. I turned around to face him, saw a young, clean cut male with short dark hair, and very handsome, smiling at me. Again he started telling me about ‘us’ and ‘them’ as he puts his hand on me to help me down the stairs. I feel I want to get even closer to him, so I put my arm around his back for more support.

As I start down the stairs, another female ‘worker’ quickly cuts ahead of me and I start bumping into her, apologizing, because I’m just so clumsy with this robot I’m carrying.

Now, I’m on the stairs and make it down into a hallway of sorts, only to find my male ‘guide’ already there ahead of me! I remember saying to him, “oh, that was a cute trick!”

Now I heard someone call to me from down the hallway, ‘hey, you’ve got to come see this!’ and I go to a room on my left and look into it. It’s a sort of office that is very cluttered, and piled with papers and assorted books. I felt I wasn’t understanding why I was there and what I was to be learning, so I said I’m going to look around so I can try to figure out why I’m here.

I immediately got that ‘return’ feeling and woke up back in bed, with the feeling that I perhaps should not have questioned what was going on, but should have just ‘gone with the flow’ and I would have been able to continue further.

I wrote in my journal that I felt it was due to my attempting to take ‘control’ of the dream process that I was made to return. Perhaps this control issue is something I need to learn to ‘let go of’ was the comment I made when I wrote this in my journal.

16) Astral Vision

August 12, 2007 4:30 am

I use the term "astral vision" or "higher vision" to describe the vision we see with when we see things that "normally" would not be seen (through lower consciousness vision) - seeing "through the veil," if you will. You can be OB or simply have the OB mental state, if you will, when you use astral vision....Many times, astral vision kicks in during a pre-separation but heightened state. It can be part of the pre-(conscious) OBE lead-up, or no OBE may follow. So, one need not be asleep, dreaming or in an actual OBE to have this expanded visual experience.

This morning, I was able to 'see' scenes of places, feeling like I'm traveling there, but being very much aware that I am looking through my eyes in bed. It's very hard to describe the feeling, but I know that I was watching and participating in these scenes. They did not feel to be very 'symbolic' and 'deep', but just areas I was visiting.

The first I remember was 'pulling up' next to a large ship in the ocean, watching it from the side as it moved through the waves. It was painted blue and red, with some white areas. I could even 'see' the people on the bridge as they were piloting the ship.

While I am becoming aware I am doing this, it appears I am watching as if through a car window, with some distortion. As the scene started to fade, I said 'clarity now' hoping to clear it up, but the scene then changed to a large area of land, high above the ocean, formed in 'blocks' that may have had a track running along the top of it.

Again the scene shifts, and now I am in a city, and zooming along the streets watching the people and buildings. I get the feeling of a European city (I have never been to Europe) for some reason, and can even read the names of some of the stores. The only one I can recall had a T & A in the name and I felt it was a jewelry store of some sort.

The most interesting part was the 'cut-outs' of people that were placed along one section of sidewalk. The pictures were most interesting, with lifelike pictures of various people in different poses. At one point, a man and a woman asked me if I wanted to 'see' myself in one of them, and I felt they were going to pull a prank on me and make the picture something funny, so I really didnt' going along with their suggestion.

The last thing I remember is sitting in a fountain area, watching a young boy, whom I felt I was caring for. He was rather reluctant to take his nap, but with some persuasion, I convinced him to 'just rest his eyes' and he fell asleep.

Really, I don't feel there was much significance to this experience, but I thought I'd share it since I'm not sure really what this was, except that it was so real and exciting to do.

15) Trouble at School

July 13, 2007 7am

I was at a school but in the back section (had a faculty entrance feeling) and then proceeded to walk around to the front sidewalk. I knew I was going on a trip with a class somewhere.

While on the sidewalk, I heard a commotion and then saw a bomb(!) drop to the sidewalk in front of me! I saw two relatives just in front of me closer to dropped bomb. The bomb did not explode, but just landed there point down, balanced on end on sidewalk. I felt this was an ‘ongoing’ event (bombing) but that we were lucky this time as it did not explode.

A few minutes later, I watched as a green flag antennae shot up from the back of the bomb (which was still pointing down on sidewalk) and then realized “OH NO! it’s going to explode!”, and it did! (I felt it was ‘trick bomb’ with a delayed detonation that worked best with complacent attitudes)

I knew that people were hurt, and a woman off to my left was very badly hurt. I didn’t think I was too bad, but was grazed in the face because I could barely see out of my right eye and blood was dripping down. (Funny, though, I felt this was a ‘good’ thing somehow.)

Now I remember being told there is going to be no class trip now, so the class was going to watch a movie instead. I asked the name of the movie (thinking I’d like to see it too), but when I heard the name, knew I saw it already and ‘moved on’.

Now found myself in a room talking with a couple about their new baby, and felt it was related to me somehow. I was told the baby's name was ‘Alora’ or ‘Ali’ or something like that. I asked how they chose that name and they said it was short (nickname) for ‘Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious’ (a fictional long word from the Mary Poppins movie). I became upset because I knew this child would have a very difficult time in kindergarten when they start school because they always make you write out your legal name, not a nickname.

This was not recorded in my usual fashion so many details may be left out, but since the basic story stayed with me even after a few hours of being awake, I thought I’d write down what I can remember.

14) Intent is Everything

I just wanted to post a note here letting everyone know that since I have been on vacation for the past 3 weeks, there has been little posting done. I still have had dream experiences and have them recorded, but due to time constraints, I haven't been able to get them written out and evaluated.

I do want to point out it IS true that placing intent and expecting results will give you the best experiences. Over the past three weeks, I slowed down on the number of attempts and 'working' sessions due to the vacation. I still have had dreams and experiences, but they in no way compare to the sometimes 'high-level' ones that I have when I expect and work toward them. I feel the dreams I have had still have very symbolic events, but the actual lucid-type experiences were not there.

Now that things are getting back to 'normal', I will hopefully be able to post more here. I did want to make sure everyone knew that focusing intent and fully expecting results WILL give you the best chances for any lucid dream experiences and OOBEs.

13) One Sentence Description

7:52am 7/04/07

I woke with the definite feeling I had just done some intensive ‘studying’ (for lack of a better word) somewhere, and the only recall I had was this task I was given at the end. The task was to find a sentence in this book that best described me, the ‘whole me’. (Again, this may be a reference to my beginning blog entry that says I’m on “Journey One – getting to know yourself”)

I was sent to a ‘waiting room’ to look up in a book (one I knew very well) to find a single sentence that I felt would describe who I am. I knew where I wanted to look but it was taking me a long time to find it. I knew the exact sentence I wanted, and it was in this book in a chapter that dealt with 18th century or 1700’s. The book covered all kinds of information and had many chapters to go through. I felt had read this book before, and it covered all aspects of myself, from being a mom, to cooking and recipes. I was looking at the titles of the chapters on top, specifically looking for this 18th century reference. Any other sentence I found just wouldn’t do a good enough job to fully describe what I felt was ‘me’.

My counselor there gave me this task was there off to my left, doing other things while I’m searching the book in this waiting room full of other people. My friend Susan was there talking to people just like a counselor would, participating in the conversation, and trying to help the others with their issues. (Something she does in real life too)

I felt I was holding everything up, causing a delay, in trying to find this sentence. I got the feeling I was there with someone else and I knew I could find a sentence that described that person, but I just couldn’t find one to fully describe me.

I did wake with a 'knowing' that perhaps I am NOT able to be described by just one sentence, but am a myriad of all that I have ever been! (which I’m sure may mean my many past lives).

12) Other Beings and People

5:51am 7/01/07

I was coming down a familiar stretch of highway by our local high school with the feeling I had somehow received ‘superpowers’, now being able to move very fast! As I passed by the school entrances, I saw a group of familiar people standing, watching my arrival, near the first school entrance. I believe I had some interaction here with these individuals, especially one I felt very close to, but have no recall as to what exactly took place.

At the second school entrance, just a little further down, I saw 3-4 ‘otherworldly beings’ standing at the entrance. They were completely different shapes (robotic-like? no obvious humanoid shape), and a variety of colors, with a glowing soft light green area on one. I remember having fun, skidding into their area (because I was traveling SO fast!) to stop in front of them.

The one said ‘whoa!’ like he was startled due to my quick appearance and he put his hand out toward my ‘energy center’ to see who I was. He pulled back quickly (as if he touched something hot) saying “Who are you? You’re not from here!” I felt I was not expected at this place, as they were standing in such a way to block this entrance.

Feeling not very welcome, I continued on down the road, but with the knowing that the one familiar male presence that I had passed on the first entrance was watching. There was such a strong connection to him as he watched me leave, so I wanted to ‘show off a little’ by doing skating-like maneuvers. I felt him say to me, “Come on, show me ‘Mach-5 speed!” so I then take off knowing he was watching, yet wishing I could have stayed with him!

I next found myself in a hallway, knowing I had to get to this one class. I felt I was running late but it was an ‘excused lateness’ as they knew I was doing something important before arriving.

The hallway area had a closed door at the end and just as I got to the door, I heard someone on other side (of the door) say “Come on, open the door! I have to get in and get to class!” So as the door opened for this other person, I took the opportunity and went on in.

I walked into my classroom on the right, where I saw an older woman teaching. There were others all around working on their projects. I watch as an older man came into the classroom ahead of me, joking around saying he was dropping off mail for the teacher from (a local community college here). I knew enough to realize this class was definitely not from this college, (the letter carried the feeling it was something going on union-wise or politically wise), and I saw that the teacher was not at all interested in opening up this letter.

The teacher did see me come in right behind him, saying, “oh good! I’m glad you could make it!” and began working on my project. I had the feeling I had just done something or went somewhere prior to arriving that we took pictures of and she asked if I had seen the pictures yet. It felt like it was a ‘graduation’ of sorts that occurred prior, and I said “no, I haven’t seen anything yet.”

I was handed this whole stack of photos, saved in envelopes. I spread them on the table, carefully taking out the first set of photos. It was a picture of two boys, and the teacher said ‘there, that’s him, with his older brother’, with the feeling it was his graduation, someone I knew well. The next few pictures were various young kids with one specific picture suddenly showing me two of my own children as young boys, along with these other two boys. The picture was taken many years ago in a ‘workshop’ type setting (which felt familiar, but I have no clear recall of this place). I knew this was someone they grew up with, so I said “I’m so glad you have pictures of my boys with them” and the teacher said, “well of course I would, that was a very important time because he had just lost his other friends and was so happy to made new friends.” Now I felt she was the mother of the new ‘graduate’ and was explaining to me how my boys helped her son so much.

The next picture I picked up was actually a picture frame with a video playing in it. In this video was a firefighter, a man who had a heavy black mustache and heavy black coarse hair., He spoke loudly and arrogantly, with a touch of obscene words, much like a ‘macho’ full of ego firefighter might do. He turned to show the back of his black turnout coat with NYFD (?) logo, and I saw his shoulders covered with dirt and dust. I cannot recall any of the words he spoke, only his demeanor and personality.

I related the scene to NY on 9/11/01, but don’t know if it was actually then or just my perception. I also knew this was someone I had previously been involved with romantically because I missed him, feeling I hadn’t seen him in so long and was so happy to see him again! But, this feeling was tempered with the fact that I knew he was married, and I was watching what was like a review of his life. The video went back to his younger days and then faded into a picture of his wife as a younger girl. She looked Italian, with an olive complexion, a thin young girl who then transformed into an older woman with long black hair, parted in the center. The last picture was of the both of them as young couple that then changed into them in their older years. I felt some ‘guilt’ that I could have been ‘involved’ with him romantically despite the fact he was already married.

I am not sure what all this means, but I woke up knowing that perhaps this was a part of another life that I no longer needed to feel ‘guilty’ about. There is so much going on in this dream/OBE recall that I am having a difficult time deciphering all the hidden meanings!