Blog Archive

Saturday, September 27, 2008

74) Thinking in OOBE; Meeting Karen

I have had a concern about my lack of dreams and OOBE travels over the past week or so, despite knowing that the increase in emotional and stressful situations I have encountered is most likely the cause.

With a stability of emotions and stress levels in the past two days, I once again find I am better able to detect subtle changes in my perception of events as they have happened. I had asked many times for ‘signs’ from the Universe that I have guidance and assistance, despite ‘knowing’ they are always there.

There is actually this little dialogue I have with my guides, in that I constantly joke about my ‘neediness’ for these signs, reminding them I am the one ‘in physical’ and they must remember how hard it is! lol True to form, they do grant my requests, and whether it is an unexpected sighting of my ‘totem’ animal, the flashing of a light, or a sequence of numbers at key times, I always know they are with me and helping.

So, feeling more stable and secure emotionally, I wanted to experience OOBE travel once again, not setting a definite intention as I usually do, but generally requesting to ‘just get out’ and if I can, meet someone, preferably a guide if I could. As usual, my requests were granted!

I remember feeling the soft buzzing at one point, and getting excited to think I was going to get out. I was disappointed when the buzzing disappeared, but then it returned stronger along with the ‘floating’ sensation signal that told me I could start moving out!

It was still harder than usual to separate, as I rolled over with my feet off the couch, I found I actually had to turn around to face the couch and pull my‘self’ out with a backward motion! This was a unique exit maneuver for me, but I was determined to get out! lol

I headed for the side door, through the dining room, and remember not even being concerned about going around the table anymore in my determination to get outdoors. I could easily ‘feel’ the change in texture as I passed directly through the table and the door, finding myself outside with a sense of freedom once again!

I recall flying, enjoying the swoops and circles, up and down the trees, looking closely at a pine tree and sensing its texture. I did not remember that I wanted to do ‘inward now!’ because I was so enjoying myself.

I do recall I did take the time to stop in front of a tree and see if I could understand ‘how’ I am thinking! This is difficult to explain, but I wanted to know if how I was thinking at that moment was any different than how I would ‘think’ in real life! My decision at that time was that my ‘thinking process’ was exactly the same as it was when I was fully ‘awake’ and still in control of my thoughts and actions.

In hindsight, however, once I really ‘woke’ I recorded the fact that the thinking process DID feel differently in a small way! I really don’t know if I can explain the different, but there was a ‘softer, gentler’ feel to my thoughts while OOB, and a ‘stronger’ more ‘austere’ feeling to my waking conscious thoughts. I am assuming it could be the difference between the ‘happiness and bliss’ I feel when OOB as compared to the more physical thoughts that are tainted with human emotions.

I continued to fly around doing something, but also remember having some difficulty at one point in getting control of where I wanted to go. I remember looking up to the tops of some trees, intending to go there, and finding that I was slow to respond. It was getting harder and harder to control my actions, and with that realization, I awoke and recorded what I could recall. There is more information here that I know I forgot but it’s gone…

Settling back in, I became aware of what felt like a ‘commercial interruption’ (at least that’s what I recorded it as!) A male figure was standing in the living room by the couch I was on and made an announcement. He said something about having to “talk to the ‘management’ of the ‘charity’ if you are not getting what you need out of it”….whereupon I then heard the usual musical ending of all cartoons (that I recall from childhood) just prior to Porky Pig showing up saying, ‘That’s all folks!” lol I knew it was ‘the end’ of this experience, and I woke fully and recorded it.

The next experience I believe was a bit of another false awakening in that I definitely thought I was fully awake, yet because of my frequent ‘false awakening’ experiences, knew I had to just lie still and go with whatever was happening.

It started with a conversation I was having with my ex-husband, and could feel his sarcasm and anger because he felt I wasn’t doing something I was supposed to. I recall he had a ‘swelling’ at the bottom of one leg, telling me he ‘had a bad leg’, and I told him, “Well, at least you have insurance for now” with the implication that he would not have it after we were separated. (I believe this is just residual issues I have not completely worked out within myself with this person)

Next I recall being awake (at least I thought so!) on the couch, and realizing someone was there covering me up with another blanket. I felt it had to be my current husband wondering why I had come to the couch, as I remember telling him it was because I like to do my ‘dream traveling’ here. I just went along with whatever was going on. I felt pressure lie down beside me, more on top of me than next to me, and again, didn’t want to move until I could be certain this was truly real (which it wasn’t!)

I realized it was a false awakening when I distinctly heard a female voice, very clearly talking into my left ear! The conversation went as follows:

“My name is Karen.”
I said, “No, my name is Karen, what is your name?”
“My name is Karen, and you already have three of the four “???-star” rings…”
I asked, “What do I need to do to get the fourth?”
She answered, “Nothing more than you are doing, the fourth will come.”
I remember not know what to ask next, and was so astounded at the clarity and distinction of her voice, that I was concerned who she was.
I asked, “Are you of the Light?” and she answered, “I love the Light!” and exuded such warmth and lovingness that I knew this was someone I could trust.
I asked, “What is your story? What do you represent?” and heard her answer, yet I have no recollection of what it was!!!

After this experience, I tried to wake myself slowly as usual, tagging each part of the experience with a key word so it would enable a better recall. It was so difficult this time to drag back the information to consciousness, and once again, had the ‘false awakening’ of thinking I was recording my information and realizing that nothing was recorded once I was really fully awake! I lose so much when this happens! This is just so frustrating sometimes! lol

The last experience for the night was limited in its recall as well, but I will share what I remember. I found myself above a room full of people who felt like ‘coworkers’ but only in the sense that they were there to do the same ‘work’ I was doing. (There were not my real life coworkers as I didn’t specifically know who the individuals were) I knew I was above them, looking down, so I was not actually ‘one of them’ in form, but the same as them in what they were there to do.

I wanted to get the attention of someone, and remember tapping the back of the head of one woman and was so surprised to see her react to my touch with a startled quick move and look back! She had no idea what just happened, but I could see that my ‘presence’ was able to be known that way!

Another older woman then came on scene, (one with short light blond hair and a warm smile) and was able to communicate with me (telepathically it felt). I asked her if she could feel my ‘tap’ behind her head, and she said, ‘just a little’. I wondered how she was able to communicate with me when the others could not, yet did not question her lead when she took me around to the different rooms and people within this house. I am not sure what I was doing, and have no recall as to the specifics of our conversation, yet knew I was being shown something of importance.

Unfortunately, these experience are not of the usual depth and breadth that I like to share, but still I feel have some elements of learning that I hope others can use. I am just so happy to have had another OOB experience as a validation once again that this is something I shall continue to have that will help my personal development and insight as to the limitless information the Universe has to offer.

Any insight or comments from anyone is always eagerly welcomed!
Any ideas what these '??-star rings' are???


I have had some great responses on other forums and want to add some insight....I believe most definitely that there is this 'piece' of each one of us that resides within the higher realms, left there in whatever 'amount' we decided we wanted to be there for this lifetime to help us in navigating this physical life.

This is the 'Higher Self' we can seek for guidance, and in this experience, I am now thinking that due to the 'commercial announcement' I had just prior to the contact with 'Karen', that he was telling me I had to talk to the 'management' (my Higher Self!) if I wanted to get better outcomes! lol

As for the rings, my thanks goes to David for his insight: A clue to the star rings might be in the significance of 3 and 4. Three represents limitation and a binding to the physical 3 dimensions. 4 refers to the 4th dimension and freedom... the Quaternary.

Indeed, with experience freedom from bodily bondage will come... but not in "time". It will come in your release from time and 3 dimensions into the 4th, so to speak.

You have collected 3 of the star rings, because you're here. The fourth is the consummation of your purpose here and that comes through release. Therein lies your purpose for seeking the OBE experience. -David

Saturday, September 13, 2008

73) Two Exits - Connecting with G; Intense Feeling of Objects

As I am still very much interested in trying to 'connect' with someone within the astral realms, I once again went to bed with the intention of trying to find G. Previously we had attempted a pre-arranged meeting at a visualized park we called "Paradise Park" a few nights ago that had some minor 'hits' in correlation, but in general, was not validating to any degree.

This time, I thought I'd try to 'connect' by traveling once again to his area, to see what I would find. (His responses will be at the end of the OOBE description)

I remember becoming aware of all-over vibrations, not strong and earth-shaking, but as tingling, soft, gentle buzzing would be a better description. I am fully ‘alert’ now and ease into the sensations, willing them to become stronger as I know this is the beginning of an adventure! lol

During the buzzing sensations, however, I am also hearing the usual ‘false awakening’ signal of someone in the house walking down the stairs and to the kitchen. (I sense it was again my husband, as I am always concerned he’ll come down and try to convince me to return to bed – he doesn’t really understand what I do on my ‘traveling’ couch....)

***NOTE: I’m thinking this may be a way my personal ‘fears’ are manifested in order to try to get my conscious mind to fully wake or even shut down to not remember ‘getting out’ – This is common, IMO, and something I feel I should share with those of you that are just learning this process.

With beginning OBEs, your ‘higher self’ is trying to protect your conscious mind from overloading it with information and happenings that it may not be able to process – IMO – so to learn to ‘go with’ any fears that arise and not fully awaken or drop into sleep is important for your OBE development***

Now the buzzing is quite intense, yet still very comfortable, I sense my both my legs floating up. Again, this is my cue that I’m ready to roll! I roll out very easily this time, with no heaviness or pulling sensations. I am again SO clear in my thoughts and head for the front door.

It is dark, though, and I have the occasional ‘exit blindness’ again. I affirm ‘clarity now!’ twice as I float gently upward and begin moving in a very peaceful, calm manner. I remember I want to ‘go see G.!’ and there was a very short sensation of movement as my vision opened up.

I can see I am high above the earth, looking down at what appears to be flat land, crisscrossed with highways, and have the feeling it is nighttime, although there is plenty of light to see. Moving closer to the earth, I can even see the cars on the highways and a flashing ‘arrow’ warning light, as if there was construction moving the traffic to the right. I sense it is an urban area, yet with expanses of land between the crisscrossed highways.

I remember thinking that G. lives in a city, so this can’t be where he is, and was directed to look further up and see a cluster of city lights ahead. Instead of heading for the city lights, I moved down to an area that had a ‘park-like’ feeling to it, and could see what I ‘labeled’ a train trestle (for later recall). It was an open iron structure, grid-like, either a bridge or open tunnel, with the distinctive black background and big yellow X on it – similar to what I would have seen on the back of a train engine. (At least that was how I processed this structure).

I am not sure where I went, but it may have been into that trestle. It became very dark, and I am aware I am in a ‘superman’ type position with my hands out front because I was suddenly startled to find the powerful ‘physical’ touch of strong male hands coming from behind and covering both my fists!!

I take a few thoughts to overcome my initial shocked response, again learning to ‘go with’ anything that happens. The hands remain over top of my own as we move gently along in darkness, and I sense information coming through, yet cannot recall specific details! I DO know I asked him, ‘are we still going to go see G?’ and got the resounding answer of YES!

Upon hearing his answer, either I then got too excited and found myself waking, or there was more to this conversation that leads me to believe it was not time for this experience to be completed. I am left with the feeling of contentment and anticipation knowing that I heard from him that I WILL be able to connect at some time!!

This first experience happened 4a – 5a and I immediately tried to re-induce to go OOB again. In lying there visualizing, I was so happy to have had this experience that I intended that if I did get out again, I would go ‘inward now’ and try to help others if I could as a way of showing thanks and appreciation. Meanwhile, in my visualizations I attempted to send keywords and images to G. in the event he would be able to receive them.

(After awakening fully and getting up later at 8am, I realized that there was a very symbolic dream I had at this time that I did not even remember until arising! –that is quite unusual for me! - The symbolism of the ‘dream’ indicated that I was probably ‘not prepared’ properly for the ‘classwork’ I was scheduled to do)

I awoke after this at 7a and was disappointed to know that since I have to now be ‘on call’ for work, I may not get another change to go OOB. But, the Universe saw it important that I did get another chance!

Relaxing back, I realized the soft buzzing sensations had returned! Knowing time was short, I intently tried to increase their vibrations to the point where I could feel the floating sensation start. Not wanting to wait for full separation, as soon as I felt any floating, I rolled off and out! (I am so impatient sometimes! lol)

Due to my impatience, this time it was a bit harder to move, and I had to ‘push’ myself to the door, even recalling that I had my toes pushing against the couch in order to stretch myself to the other side of the room!

It became easier to move once at the door and moved outside, only to find that upon moving through the door I could physically FEEL the change in texture! The best I can describe it is as if it was a ‘crackling, fuzzy’ sensation as my body moved through it. There was a definite difference in this ‘feeling’ as it was more intense than anything I remember previously.

I then tried to see if the same intense sensation would be felt as I exited the porch and side of house, which it was! I could even feel the difference as I moved out into the ‘sunshine’! (although there was no sun shining when I woke, so perhaps it could have been the ‘light’ sensation I felt)

I floated up high, seeing my house and yard clearly, and then thought ‘let me feel the trees!’ that are there. I reached out to the trees and felt the same change in texture as my arms and body passed through so easily! I then think I’d like to feel the earth, and immediately move down and feel my arms and torso sink deep into the earth, sensing that change so intensely! I remember thinking this is so cool! I can feel so much more intensely in this OBE!

I float back up high, remembering I wanted to go ‘inward now’ as a thanks for the previous OBE, yet also thinking I’d really like to still find G.! So I twist slightly attempting to spin, affirming ‘inward now!’ and realize I’m now in a more mountainous area, with open meadows, and that same floating peacefulness I experienced in the previous OBE.

Thinking I may be too ‘awake’ and still had to induce that ‘black tunnel’ experience that I usually get with ‘inward now’, I visualize a free fall sensation. I once again find myself in a blackness that opens to the quiet mountain meadow, lying there enjoying the peace and quiet.

I gradually became more aware and tried to recall this OBE for recording. I hold my recorder and see that it is not working properly, falling apart in my hands, then playing music, upside down and just in general fumbling with it to the point where I thought I was going to not be able to record anything! (another fear in a false awakening?)

Of course, upon fully awakening, I find only 15 minutes have passed and my recorder is not even in my hands! I record what I recall and now feel this OBE was more for increasing my awareness of astral ‘sensations’ and to perhaps give me some much needed peacefulness!

G.'s response: You made it to the area where I live. :-) I live in a small city/suburb that is surrounded by low hills with valleys. I am impressed! You should be elated! Picked up on the train part. Yes, I live near tracks!

(Also, he mentioned the night before coming home from work with this experience: "Evidently several trains collided and shut down may arteries to the freeway. Unfortunately, I was 1 hour waiting (stopped) before I found out what happened and could get on another route." Might this have been the 'construction/warning' lights I saw??)

Thursday, September 4, 2008

72) Easy Exit Recall


My initial recall for this experience started with another ‘false awakening’ in the sense that I knew I was on the couch and again heard my stepson come into the living room. Having learned to ‘just go with it’ and not wake myself up despite my feeling of already being fully awake, I listen as I hear him come over to the couch and start searching for something.

Now I can see him standing next to the couch (as far as I’m concerned, I’m still ‘pretending’ to be asleep, with my eyes closed, yet didn’t think twice of being able to see him!) and he is ‘physically’ touching the blankets (as I can feel his touch and tugging at the covers!) looking for something, appearing slightly upset.

At this point I am certain this is a false awakening as I know my stepson would NOT be doing this in real life! lol Now I attempt to communicate and mentally ask him, “what are you looking for?” Getting no response, I ask twice more and then watch as he actually dissipates before my eyes!

As he disappears, I get intense warm sensations (almost like burning) on my back/spine area and a feeling of fullness in my head. This is something new, as it was not the same as the vibrations I have previously felt in other OOBEs.

The next recall I have I am up and out of body, zooming through my house, thinking and SEEING so clearly! I move through the walls to the outdoors and am just reveling in the awesome feeling of lightness and freedom! The clarity of my ‘being’ at that time was phenomenal!

So now I’m outside, flying and zooming, and so enjoying myself! Without thinking that it was unusual, I was seeing my house and yard in a winter scene, with snow banks and snow covering most of the area (it’s summertime right now!) I also see my house and surroundings not as they actually appear, but in a more ‘elegant’ state, bigger and better in every sense. (My feeling was that this IS my house, but my perception of it was to the degree as I always wished it could be – perfect in every way)

I remember even zooming through a snow bank to feel the change in texture, as I then flew around the back of the house toward my parents’ house down the road. I can see their house as well, knowing it IS their house, yet again it is so much bigger and better than it actually is in real life!

I recall thinking, ‘aw, no lights are on’…but then upon getting closer, could see lights on and people inside. I thought ‘hey, I might as well go inside and see what I can find’, but then remembered, ‘oh, wait, I wanted to go see if I could find G.S!’

So, at that moment of realization, I changed flying direction and zoomed straight up into the dark sky, with the question, “G.S. where are you?” repeated over and over. I remember the darkness enveloping me, and tried listening for any response. I also recall thinking, ‘gee, I wish I had set up a signal word to focus on because that could have helped’.

Realizing I was not getting anywhere, and hearing no reply, I became fully aware and recorded this experience. However, in hindsight, upon my relaxing back into the ‘mindstate’ necessary for more recall, did record something I barely remember recording! (I guess I am getting pretty good at running the recorder even while my conscious mind is not completely back in physical!)

The snippet I recorded was the fact that I felt as if I was trying to get someone, who felt like they could not do something, to realize that they really could. This ‘someone’ felt like it was part of me, yet it also felt like someone else (?). I do not have a clear recollection of what it was being attempted to do, but I knew I was trying to help.

I then wanted to try to once again get out and experience that wonderful sense of freedom and flying so I relaxed back into another attempt. I became aware this time of voices talking, and can recall hearing specific conversations, but yet not really paying attention to what was being said. One voice I recognized as my sister, which gave me the knowing that since she is not really here in my house, I must be nearly ready to get out again.

There were some floating sensations, but it was nothing like the previous exit, and I felt ‘incomplete’ or awkward in some way. Not being the most patient type of person when it comes to ‘getting out’ (lol), I say ‘oh well, let just try it!’ and remember taking my leg and swinging it up and over as if to roll out and off the couch.

It worked! But I found myself standing in the living room but with such heaviness and difficulty in moving! My affirmation of ‘to the door!’ was not working, and I knew I had to do something quickly or I’d be back in body.

I do not know how I thought of it, but what I did was to quickly visualize the easy time I just had previously and the sensations of freedom and lightness I felt in flying. I could actually make myself ‘feel’ those zooming movements, and the lightness of being able to fly in any position, feet up, head down, whatever. Funny thing is I remember visualizing myself flying through autumn-colored leaves on trees (again wrong season!). By recreating this sensation, I immediately found myself back outside my house and flying!

So I am once again doing my aerial acrobatics through the trees near my house, noticing they are now barren of leaves (must be winter again! lol) I distinctly recall going to one particular tree, tall yet skinny enough to put my hands around the truck/branch at the top) and shaking it! I was so clear in my thinking, I could physically feel this tree, and was saying to myself, ‘don’t tell me this isn’t real!!’ as if I had to convince someone!

So I try to head back to my parents’ house, thinking I’d like to also go see G.S., but this is so much more fun! Somehow, and without any recall of how/why, I found myself in soft loose dirt near an embankment that is close to my parents’ house (actually embankment is there in real life). Someone was there with me, a male, and I was talking with him.

Once again, the heaviness returned, I felt ‘grounded’ to the point where I could barely move. I remember crawling in the dirt, seeing the impressions of my feet as I tried to scale the embankment. (I am feeling that this person I was with was more ‘grounded’ in his vibrations, hence my need to feel it also to communicate). I also remember thinking, ‘I should be able to just say ‘to the house’ and go but it also wasn’t working.

He said something like, ‘let me see what I have here with me for a ‘vice’ (my impression was a cigarette or something), as he was interested in watching a movie with it (?). Again, more was talked about, but I have no recall.

The heaviness persisted, and I found I even had ‘dirt’ in my mouth, requiring me to spit it out a few times. By the third ‘spit’, I realized that I was actually ‘spitting’ in real life, which brought me to more awareness when I realized what I had done! I tried desperately to get ‘back in’, but the physical sensation of ‘spitting’ just woke me too much.

This experience was unique in the sense that my exits were so different! Yet I was able to use the visualization of the extremely easy exit to help me get out again a second time (when I probably was not fully able to separate due to my impatience! lol)

Also, the unusual sensation I had on my back/head was just a bit alarming at first, however, I have learned to go with whatever is happening to continue on in the experience. I am wondering if this new sensation had anything to do with the fact that that easy exit was with such clarity and lightness. I was just an amazing sensation that I wish everyone could experience it!

Monday, September 1, 2008

71) Helping in Hospital

With this experience I must apologize in advance as I feel I lost most memories of exactly what I was doing, yet still retain the wonderful feeling and knowing that I was having the time of my life doing it!

You will notice the number of times I use 'feelings' in this section - as this was an OOBE that was mostly based on my feelings and emotions. Perhaps it is also why the information was so easily lost upon fully awakening - words just are not adequate to properly describe all that was felt and done.

I also understand that 'higher level' actions and emotions are not easily recalled by the conscious physical mind, and yet another reason the details may have been lost so quickly.

Usually my word association technique works well with most long experiences, however, even the signal words were lost in this one - possibly due to the false awakening at the end!

Anyone have any ideas how to remember the less tangible/emotional/feeling aspects of an OOBE?


I went to bed with the intention of using ‘Inward Now!’ if I had the chance to get OOB. I became aware of the ‘floating’ feeling once again, and knew I could just roll out.

Again it was so heavy, with the strong tugging and pulling back to body sensation while I tried to move across my living room from the couch I was sleeping on. I remember getting just through the front door and deciding I was far enough away to just do the ‘Inward Now!’ affirmation.

I was not disappointed in that I immediately felt the familiar backward black tunnel falling sensation, and enjoyed what felt like a long time of rapid backward movement. I almost felt like you were on a completely dark rollercoaster, yet one with a very gentle, smooth ride.

When the movement stopped, I once again found myself getting OOB from the couch (actually a common happening anymore). This time, however, as I stood, there was no heaviness or tugging, and I was surprised to find I had someone there with me!

With my ‘go with it’ attitude, I saw that she was helping me to get ‘dressed’ in something. I could physically feel her hands on my arms and shoulders, helping me to pull on some sort of covering, having my hands and arms in first and open in the back. (In hindsight, I can see that this is very similar to the sterile surgical gowns I ‘dress’ in regularly at work in the hospital)

I felt as though I was ‘being prepared’ for going someplace, and while getting ‘dressed’ I remember asking her, “How come I can’t see anything?” as it was total blackness. I did not get an answer, but my vision opened up to allow me to see that I was still within my house, yet was still unable to see the female who was assisting me.

Once dressed, I knew I was to follow her through my dining room to the far right corner. (I do feel there was communication with her, but not with words, so there is no ‘recall’ of them.) Watching her disappear through the wall there, I also knew that I was going to do the same to follow her, which I did without a concern.

From this point on, I have only limited recall, but will give the few highlights I do remember. On my recording, I can hear how distressed I am that I cannot remember all that I did, because I felt it was something so wonderful!

The first place I remember going was to the rooftop or building with an open area to the sky. It was nighttime and I was there with ‘Maryanne’, a black woman who was deep in conversation with me. I recall looking up to the night sky and seeing such beautiful star formations! Nothing like I have ever seen before! I remarked how beautiful they were, as instead of individual points of light, there were ‘clusters’ of stars in various shapes all over the sky! I recall her saying, ‘we call that one the Sphinx’ as she pointed to one, and I responded, ‘yes, I can see why’.

I only recall how pretty the night sky was to look at there, and the fact that part of our conversation dealt with Maryanne telling me something about Africa and how she was comparing her roots there to this other life she had lived. I have no further recall, but know it was a long, deep conversation I had with her.

My next recall is the one I felt most disappointed about NOT remembering the details. I was with these two young boys, in a ‘hospital-type’ (feeling) environment, and having a wonderful time interacting with them. They were both about 5 years old, and I felt I was helping them in some way, taking care of them. I picture them as sitting up on top of some area, and we were talking and moving about, but again, no details. There was also this feeling of MY learning something there, yet that is all I am left with.

At one point, I heard a phone ringing in another room, and ‘felt’ someone tell me “you go ahead and answer the phone” with the additional feeling that it was not an ordinary phone, so I’d have to look for it. I recall looking at shelving with knickknacks of some sort on it, wondering which of these items might be the ringing phone I was supposed to answer! I had the feeling it might have been a ‘doll’ I was supposed to find, but am not sure.

A woman comes up to me in this other room and is talking to me. She said to me, ‘you know you can only be here a short time’ and she mentioned something about meeting my parents here. I became slightly concerned because I knew both my parents are still alive, and thought perhaps this meant they were going to be ‘in spirit’ for me to meet them. I was assured this was not the case and recall being told I ‘had to go back…couldn’t be there that long…’ and I said, “yea, I know….” with the understanding at the time that staying there any longer may cause me to lose even more memories!

(In hindsight, however, perhaps I could not stay there any longer because shortly after I completely awoke and recorded this experience, my ‘on call’ beeper went off for an emergency at the hospital where I work!)

After realizing I had to go, I immediately felt the same backward black tunnel falling sensation and found myself awake and fumbling with the recorder. Unfortunately, in hindsight, I realize this was another false awakening because I was in a chair, at work, with coworkers around me asking me questions and handing me things to distract me!

I am determined to get the experience recorded, trying to remember my ‘key’ words I used to associate with the experience, and all the time getting interrupted by a coworker! She was handing me a pocketbook-like item with a small blinking light on it, indicating I had a message waiting. I felt, at the time, this was an intentional delay in my recording the experience so that I would forget many details!!

I slowly became completely aware of my ‘real’ body on the couch, and attempted to record what few details I have here. There was really a big loss of memory with this experience, and I am truly distressed to think how wonderful I felt during the time, yet cannot write it sufficiently here to share that emotion with everyone.