Blog Archive

Thursday, June 26, 2008

61) 'Seeing' Guides - Positive Thoughts

I set the ‘intent’ this time to ‘connect with my guide(s)’, as I’m having a rough spell in physical life that I felt seeing or hearing from them would help my outlook on things. I usually like to use the ‘inward now’, however, I have not had the intense satisfaction I have had in the past using it. (Probably because of my ‘rough spell’ I’m going through!)

After my usual visualizations of energy raising and white light, I became aware of my only left leg floating up from my body. Not wanting to wait for the rest of the body to separate, I just quickly rolled out (actually felt like I jumped out!) and once again found myself in the living room next to where I was sleeping on the couch.

I moved quickly away from where I exited, as I could again feel that ‘tug’ of energy wanting to pull me back. Once I was across the room, the tugging ceased and I was free to roam about. Finding myself next to the bathroom, I thought I heard someone up and inside the room, but didn’t stay around to investigate.

I attempt to remember what it was that I wanted to do, and I am always thrilled when I am able to easily recall now what it is that I set ‘intent’ to do each time! I knew I didn’t want ‘inward now’, but to see/connect with my guide/s. I look around for anyone, but for some reason didn’t think to call out to them.

I moved to the dining room, again with clear vision, looking toward the driveway that separates my house from my parents. I see headlights coming down the driveway, and I also take notice that it is still dark outside, yet everything has this ‘glow’ about it to make all things visible, even within the house.

I watch as the car pulls out the driveway, I am suprised to hear myself say, ‘well, there goes my entire family’, as I look within the large capacity car, counting the people. I can clearly see two rows of four in the back, with 5-6 in the front. I can now see their faces clearly, but then realize these people are NOT my actual family here now. I do sense a strong familiarity about them but there is no interaction, no communication - just my watching them drive past my house.

I didn’t know what else to do, so I moved straight through the side door to the porch, and just took off zooming along the tops of the trees, as I always enjoy doing. I wanted to get some speed up, to see how fast I could go. I zoomed at an angle up toward the sky, at one point seeing a jetliner pass very close by, and waiting to feel for that ‘rush’ of air current. I remember smiling as I felt it, and continued zooming upward, seeing two other smaller planes pass by as well.

Becoming bored, I then decided I’d just go straight up to outer space and see what I could find there. (I have previously been there, in that quiet blackness looking toward earth, and enjoyed the peacefulness I felt.) This time, however, as I travel upward at mach speed and feel the changes, I begin to feel some (physical belief) fears creeping in about being able to withstand being in space.

Knowing that the appearance of fears will quickly end an experience, I remember that I don’t have to ‘travel’ to get where I want to go. I can just ‘be there’. So I say, “I am there now” with the feeling that I am going to be wherever I am supposed to end up. (I just wasn’t clear on my destination, hence that statement I assume!)

I now find myself in the center of a small town square, with buildings on four sides, walking around seeing no one. I peek into some of the glass doors just off the street, and I had this impression it’s a town where anything you want, anything you need is there. It just appears as you want it. I wonder why I see no one else here, is it possible that they all have what they want already and don’t need to be here? I then begin to lose my awareness at that point and sadly become aware of being back in my body on the couch.

I will mention here that I have just finished the book by Abraham/Esther & Jerry Hicks regarding the Universal Law of Attraction and found it fascinating. Using many of their suggestions over the past weeks, I am beginning to believe even more strongly now that ‘thoughts are things’ and you DO create what you are thinking.

Finding the positive in any situation, no matter how difficult it may be, will only give you MORE positive experiences. Dwelling on the negative, will only bring you more negative experiences. My latest mantra is, “I intend to see only that which I WANT to see” and it’s working!

Sunday, June 22, 2008

60) Clear Vision with Exit - Assumed Invisibility

6/22/08 5am

I first became aware of getting out as my feet floated up out of my body as I lie on the couch. For the first time, I could SEE my legs rising, as my vision immediately was focused and clear even before getting fully out of body! They appeared transparent and foggy white, and I was just amazed!

(Before this time, I would always be ‘blind’ as I exited, feeling the sensations of moving out but not seeing until I was fully out and ‘intending’ to see)

I remember saying to myself, ‘wow this is the clearest I have ever seen!’ I affirmed “to the door!” but remember being clever in wanting to drift outside feet first! I clearly remember the sensation of passing through the front door feet first, feeling its texture change down my entire body as I went through.

Once outside, I again enjoyed the freedom of being out, doing loops and flips to totally experience this OOB sensation. After satisfying my need for ‘freedom’, I remember I had set the intention for this travel of using “Inward Now!” affirmation (as William Buhlman suggests for personal development while OOB). Immediately, I realize I am traveling through blackness once again.

I find myself in a city, walking down a sidewalk, and seeing people also going my way toward a ‘waiting area’ of sorts at the end of a grassy island. I try to talk to a female who is passing and I find her response is totally unintelligible. Moving on down to where more are ‘waiting’ (for ? ), I realize I am unable to interact with anyone and am feeling useless.

Becoming discouraged, I remember I can change my location by re-stating “Inward now!” and spinning myself to the left, which works immediately. Again, blackness and a moving sensation, and I find myself becoming aware that I’m back on the couch, thinking I had another uneventful OOBE!

As I ‘open’ my eyes (so I think!), I am amazed to see that this is NOT my house! I try to focus on what differences there are to help in my recall. The room appears the same size and shape, yet there are walls with papers tacked to it on a bulletin board where there should be doorways. Long blue vertical blinds cover the area where my front door should be, and so I get up to investigate further.

Now, I realized I am not in my own house, and walk to the blinds to look outside. I get the feeling this is an old farmhouse, with a front porch, and I watch as an older model vehicle (truck?) pulls away from the front of the house.

It is nighttime, and I decided to walk through the rest of the house. The first room I enter is a bedroom with three little girls (ages 2-10?) Two big beds were there, one young girl was awake and reading (?) and one little girl was asleep on the floor next to the other bed. (I had the feeling she just preferred the floor to sleep on, not that she didn’t have a bed.)

They did not interact with me, so I assumed I was not able to be seen. I moved to another bedroom and there I saw a big double bed with 2-3 other twin beds in it, with young boys sleeping here with the parents in the larger bed. It was dark, and I realized that no one was aware of my presence, and I did not recognize any of them.

Feeling a bit intrusive, I moved to the bottom of the larger bed and listened as the father was discussing things with the mother. It seems as though there were money issues, and the father was becoming upset and irritated at what was happening with them, as he felt he was not having enough money to support his family. The mother wasn’t saying too much, and the father became frustrated to the point where he was loud and stormed out of the bedroom.

I followed him out of the room, and then saw the oldest of the girls standing outside her bedroom, closing the door gently. I only heard part of what she was saying “…that old booger…” (meaning her father), being concerned that he would wake her sisters.

I was stunned as she turned to face me, and said, “Well, Karen, that was my dad!” I was totally caught off guard, as I didn’t think anyone could see me, much less talk to me! I felt at a total loss for words, and I think what do I say to her??

The first thing I say is, ‘well, how does that make you feel?’ trying to elicit a direction to take this conversation. I then felt this may have been the wrong thing to say, so I tried to counter it with, ‘what kind of work does your father do?’

At this point I start fading back to awareness, and realized I am not going to be able to continue this conversation. Whether it was due to my inappropriate questioning, or whether I had finished this experience, I don’t know. I was left with the feeling that I may have not handled this one as well as I should have.

As for experiences, although I may not have finished it well, I am happy to know that I have this new experience of ‘seeing’ while exiting. Only once before did I partially ‘see’ myself while out of body, and it was the same white ethereal foggy appearance. (At that time, I was lying in bed, but could see the reflection in the bureau mirror next to my bed of only my arm floating above my body! It appeared as if made of tiny ‘spider web’ strings, transparent and white.)

Perhaps this experience also showed me that I should not ‘assume’ I cannot be seen or heard, as this is what I felt both with the initial ‘city’ environment as well as the farmhouse.

As always, I look forward to any insight anyone may have on this experience.

Sunday, June 15, 2008

59) Facing Negativity Again - Shield Up!!

June 15, 2008 5am

I was once again on the couch, as it now has become my favorite place to have experiences. Although I have had a few OOBEs while in bed, the majority has been from this comfy couch and I feel I have now associated it with traveling!

The first I became aware of getting out, I found my legs floating up and separating. I easily rolled my upper torso completely out off the couch and stood. It was probably the easiest separation I had ever had, and to my dismay, heard the chimes from the clock go off and found myself completely back in body!

Not discouraged (but rather disappointed!), I fell back into my routine to re-exit. This time, once I became aware of time to separate, it wasn’t as easy but I was able to roll off successfully to standing position. Moving ‘to the door!’ gave me time to think “what was it that I wanted to do today?”

This time I had set the intention to just ‘meet someone to talk to’, but always having the wish to help someone in the back of my mind. I remember once again getting outdoors and just enjoying the freedom of flight, but it was different than usual. I was in total blackness, not seeing where I was going, but fully aware I was ‘flying’ into and through various objects as I could feel the texture changes.

Surprisingly, I really didn’t care WHAT it was I was flying through, and just enjoyed the fact that no matter what I encountered, I knew I was safe and could not be harmed. Little did I know this was just a prelude to what I was really going to encounter soon!

I am also aware I went somewhere next that was exciting and fun, but have absolutely no recall of! I can only assume that this was one of those ‘higher learning’ levels that are difficult to recall that was in preparation for my next encounter. (Odd thing is, though, I KNOW I remembered what I did when I was waking slowly, but by the time I had enough word associations to remember all the rest, this part was totally forgotten!)

So, from what I do recall, I found myself appearing in this darkened living room/waiting room of sorts, with comfortable couches and chairs and perhaps a small reception area. Standing there, I call out, ‘is anyone here?’ and was surprised to see movement in one of the chairs to my right.

Going over, I see a small older woman (initially I thought child), crouched in the chair and asked her name. She tells me (S…..?) and I ask if I can help her? She tells me ‘no, but you need to see Mr. Whittley in the back.’

I thanked her and moved on, trying to stamp her name in my memory, but she starts rambling on again about the (C….?) family who knows Dina, and just visited Mrs. ???? This causes me to say, ‘wait, too many names, I can’t remember them all!’ (I’m always bad with names, and this may have been a way for me to just let go of her name, which by then I totally forgot, except that it started with an S!)

So, I’m going down this hallway with many windows on the left, a wall on the right, and look down to the end where I can see a right turn and a dark bedroom. I ‘feel’ that Mr. Whittley is in the bedroom, perhaps an older frail man who may need some help in passing, I assume. (Never assume….even in the astral!! Lol)

As I turn the right corner by the bedroom door, I am shocked and startled by the presence of this HUGE dark ball of negativity that is just outside the doorway! I can feel its radiating waves of ‘heat-like’ negativity coming at me and it causes me to feel totally defenseless and slightly fearful as it caught me completely off guard!!

I hear a deep, strong, male voice from the ball of negativity LOUDLY state, “You were supposed to sign a bondage contract!!”

Quickly and quietly, I also hear another soft male voice (from somewhere next to me) tell me, ‘Put your shield up!’ which immediately brought me back to the awareness that I am in control of any situation in OOB and my fear vanished. I know I stated strongly to myself (thought actually), “I am strong, I am safe!” and that enabled me to continue on. (I just don’t know where I get this courage from OOB….but I’m glad I do!)

I talked with this ball of negativity, not totally remembering exactly what I said, but the ending part was, “There is so much out there for you! Why don’t you come with me? There is so much fun out there...so much joy...so much….LOVE!....Come on, come with me!” as I turned to the windows that were behind me and flew out.

I am not sure what happened to that negativity or Mr. Whittley after that, and honestly, I don’t know if that was just a way for me to escape the situation or not. I cannot tell you the final outcome, but I can only hope that the negativity and/or Mr. Whittley found some help in my appearance there.

The experience surprisingly didn’t end there, because I now found myself back in the living room where I’m sleeping and looking out the window by the couch. I play with the glass, trying to put my hands and head through it, but can’t! It just causes it to stretch outward, and I think, “that’s odd, let’s try the wall.” I can easily put my hands through the wall, feeling the different textures, and the coolness outside. I can even ‘feel’ the stone chimney that I know is next to the window outside!

Feeling like I’m getting ‘lighter awareness’ signaling an end to the experience, I try to prolong it by moving to the door. I knew I was ‘running out of energy’ and it took a lot of effort just to get to the front door.

I hear water falling (knowing I have a waterfall pond outside the front door) and go outside. It appears to be raining, and I stand under a rainfall runoff, like taking a little shower, just enjoying the coolness and refreshing feel of the rain water as it hits me. I awaken fully at that time.

Saturday, June 14, 2008

Dream Recall Advice

The key is a slow awakening, trying to keep in that semi-awake state of mind long enough to make some single word associations that will enable you to recall the sequence of events.

Sometimes, when you realize that you are losing the info quickly, grab onto one piece you remember from the end of the dream and work backward trying to recall what happened just previous. Backward recall works best - even when you think you have it all - some more pieces may come as you are writing it all down.

For me, I just can't write the details fast enough, so I have my little voice recorder (nice pocket sized digital recorder) I keep on the nightstand and grab that as soon as I feel I have enough word associations to start talking. Many of my experiences are actually recorded from the end to the beginning, as one association creates recall of another.

In time, it gets a bit easier, but still frustrating also as you will always have those experiences when you awaken, knowing you had a WONDERFUL time, yet have absolutely no recall!! Some experiences, however, are just not meant to be recalled and you have to accept it, knowing your 'inner mind' has learned from or experienced it.

Of course, the more you write, the more your conscious mind takes notice that this is an important aspect of learning for you, and will work with you to try to help you remember more often. Intending to remember, as well as showing intent by recording ALL experiences, will go far in dream recall.

Friday, June 13, 2008

Traveling by Car - Symbolism

6/13/08

It is interesting that I find I'm frequently driving in cars in the beginning of my OOBEs, as cars are your mind's version of the physical body in which you are 'traveling' in. I think it's also more of a perception your 'rational' mind needs to have in order to make 'sense' of the fact that you are really 'one within a vehicle', as well as 'one who is able to leave the vehicle' at will.

Funny thing, a good example of this happened just this am - I was pleasantly surprised to find myself trying to get OOB, without having made any intention of it prior to sleep!

Initially, I found myself on a swing hanging from a tree, and could feel the 'pull' of the swing as I wanted to go higher. I 'knew' then that I was able to get out since this 'spinning & pulling' sensation is a common signal for me that I can. However, this time, nothing would budge me from my body!

I immediately became aware I am once again driving a car, only this time heading across the 'roof' of a building, knowing full well that at the end of the building I would need to fly!!! I distinctly remember thinking fearfully for a few split seconds that, 'oh no, what if I'm really driving and don't fly?'

But my 'all-knowing' mind kicked in and let me know that I would be able to, especially if I visualized the car to morph into a car-plane type vehicle, complete with little airplane wings on its sides!!! lol

Of course, it worked!! and I soon found myself flying all over OOB, enjoying the freedom of being out. I still recall having that little bit of doubt that I was really out of body as I stood in front of a tree, but said, 'well, if I'm out, I can zoom up the tree!", which of course I did!!!

There was a lot more to this story with some sort of storm I went through, and the storm I encountered ended shortly before the start of the Bejing Olympics!! How's that for crazy!?!? I just haven't had the time to write this fully yet.

The moral of this long bit is that I believe your 'rational conscious' mind needs to have associations it can deal with - and in order to get my fears under control to allow me to separate, I had to devise a plan that would be acceptable to the rational mind so that I could continue on with my journey!

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

58) Birthday Gift - Near Physical OBE

June 6, 2008 My Birthday Gift

I had the intention that I would like to celebrate my birthday with an OOBE that would help someone. Little did I know that the Universe felt that “I” needed the help more than others that day!

My first recall was that again I was driving a car down a local road, and saw some birds in the center of the road. One flew off as I got near, however, one didn’t move, narrowly being missed by my car. Thinking, “wow, that was weird he didn’t fly off as they always do” made me realize, ‘hey wait, I’m dreaming!’

I then attempted to move away from the car, without any success, and realized I could now feel my arms waving over my head in bed. Knowing this was my key to separation, I used strong intention to ‘roll off’ the bed, which I did! I found myself standing, looking at the floor near my dresser, trying to steady myself as I’m wobbling all over the place!

I tried to move my feet and walk, immediately realizing, ‘hey wait, I don’t have to walk!’ and just said ‘to the door!’ which moved me immediately. I then proceeded down the stairs, recalling that I could see my dog Buddy once again coming from the living room to join me!

As I walk into the living room, it is shaped the same, but totally devoid of the ‘regular’ furniture. There is ‘stuff’ all over the floor, nothing specific I can recall, just various items lying around. My first impression was that someone was ‘moving in?’ and as I moved into the room, could see clearly the old fashioned silver Christmas tree I remember from childhood years sparkling with its multicolored lights.

As I walked around, I am trying to concentrate and recall just what was it that I wanted to do? (This is common with my OOBEs in that my ‘conscious’ mind recall as to my intentions are sometimes difficult to remember while OOB). I remember thinking, ‘no, I didn’t want to do ‘inward now’ as I would normally do, and then remembered ‘birthday’ which then helped me to recall that I wanted to help someone.

So now I yell out (really ‘think’ out loud!) to the room, ‘is anyone there?’ and I hear it echoing around the room with no response. I yell again, and faintly recall hearing the beginning theme tune to “The Addams Family”.

As I wonder what that means, a rocking chair appears (similar to my Grandmother’s) and I sit in it. I can now hear conversations going on around me, reverberating-type echoes of conversations, yet not able to distinctly recall or remember what they were saying.

I slowly became aware I was back in bed, feeling awake, but my attention was being focused on something appearing behind my eyelids. My recall is that it looked like a white bedspread/bed, but could have been a white square/screen type reference. Something or someone told me to focus intently, and I remember pushing all my energy and effort into ‘seeing’ into this white area.

Now I’m clearly seeing (astral vision - while knowing I’m in bed) a room coming into focus. It’s an empty room, with white walls just starting to be painted with blue streaks of paint. It took a number of times to get ‘into’ this room, as I remember backing up and re-entering a few times, kind of like a film loop that was stuck in repeat mode.

Finally I get through that ‘stuck’ loop entry, and move into another room that is full of people, mostly elderly, and the ‘camera’ is panning over the people as they smile and look at me. What is unusual is that they are all ‘frozen in time’, as if a 3D picture I am panning over.

At first, I don’t recognize anyone, but then a few start looking familiar and I think that perhaps these were patients of mine over the past 25 years. As I go around to the back corner of the room, I realize I DO know these people because now there are family members there, including me!

I see myself with a small boy on my lap, with my grandmother sitting next to me smiling widely, as well as various other family members (all who are still alive, not passed over). Everyone looks SO happy and content, and I feel good just knowing I was a part of this.

Now the camera pans into another room, as it swings around the back wall, but this room was also empty. I remember I was trying to get the 'camera' to swing back around to the room full of people to see them again when I awoke completely.

This was not one of the more exciting OOBE to relate, yet I do think I was granted my birthday request, just not in the way I had intended. I woke that day with the feeling that I indeed have made some impact on the lives of those I have met, and that was the best birthday gift I could have asked for!