Blog Archive

Sunday, September 6, 2009

110) Flying with Daughter, High level 'Experience' Learning

At this time, I am only posting those experiences where I feel there is something of some importance for others to learn from. I have had a few other OOBEs just prior to this one, but again, they were mainly for my enjoyment, as the best I would be able to share with you is my love of flying and doing acrobatic swoops and spins!! lol

As always, my email is open to anyone who wishes to write and share comments or experiences. I do wish let you know that you CAN do this - and that you CAN set intentions and have them be experienced!!

9.06.09

Part 1
I went to the couch and attempted to remain aware as I fell asleep, using my energy circulating visualizations. My first awareness of something happening was hearing someone walk into the living room (it sounds so 'physical' that I always feel it's real, but remain quiet in case it's more - which it almost always is!)

This person came up to the couch and unexpectedly, jumped onto the couch near my feet and curled up with a sigh as if going to sleep with me! I realize immediately it is my daughter (one who has been going through rough times lately) and I instinctively know this is her 'non-physical' self that has come to be with me.

I even remember that I was able to recall the fact that she is currently out of state and therefore cannot really be here in physical - so this confirmed to me it was an OBE starting. I remember that I told myself she was in Virginia, but in physical reality, she is now in California! Minor detail, but it shows how the 'mind' works even in the astral - it knew she was 'out of state'!! (Hmmm, actually both physically out and also 'energetically' out!)

Knowing I'm OOB, I sit straight up, move to her side and gently call her. She's distressed, telling me all these things she has to do (dentist, labs?) so I put my arm around her and get her moving with me. I tell her we're going to 'take a ride' (not exact words, but to this effect) and we move together toward the side wall of the living room.

I remember I worried slightly that she may not be aware she can easily pass through the wall and will hesitate, but I just take control and move with her through the wall to the outside night air. I feel the cool, invigorating freshness and fly upward toward the night sky with her at my side, arm in arm.

We fly together, and it feels SO wonderful! I ask her, where do you want to go? I have a brief memory recall that I wished to go see someone, but also knew that the moon was of special meaning as well. I recall seeing a beautiful nighttime horizon before us and the gently curve of the earth as we flew so high, so I asked if she wants to go see the moon!

She says no, she needed to go to 'Virginia' to see her Marine fiance and be sure he is ok. (In reality he's in California - where she is now!) I say, 'OK', and tell her that we can be there instantly by just 'knowing' we are there, and will not need to continue flying. We then closed our eyes, focused on where we wanted to be, and knew as we opened them we were where we wanted to be.

My next recollection was that we were flying high above our intended area, and told her 'we are here, let's go down!' and with that, the fade back began and I awoke back on the couch. I felt so happy upon waking - the love and comfort I was able to give my daughter gave me such joy!

Part 2

This part of the night is really very short on details, as I intuitively know it a 'higher level' experience and the degree of return I remember having showed me even more that it was not my usual 'lower physical' OBE. You will be disappointed with the detail, however, I am NOT disappointed with the OBE!! I just wish I could make you 'feel' all that I felt and experienced! I am left with such deep joy and love....

I have to also say that in addition to meeting someone, I put forth the intention that I would like to be with my guide(s) and to learn more. I can't believe how well intention works....It was even more than I ever expected!

The first part of the OBE found myself with a guide (perhaps even more than one) that were showing me various rooms. In each room there was so much learning going on! I was enveloped with an 'experience' within each room, yet have no recollection of what each experience was! I recall watching a 'video' at times, yet it was more than just watching - I was a part of it!

Once I was done in one room, I moved into another, and then another....and each time there was another 'experience' that I so loved!! I SO wish I could recall what I was doing, but it was truly indescribable.

At one point, after a series of rooms and joyous learning, I told my guide that I wished to go see a friend. I distinctly remember a transition of sorts...and then that wonderful sensation of my friend entering on my left and I asked, "is it really you??" and yet knowing that it was!

There is no specific details of our time together except the knowing that it felt like it lasted forever and that I was able to experience all that I wanted to experience!! There was no 'time' just 'experience'....this entire OBE was all about 'experience' and the sensation of being with and knowing.....oh, I just can't describe it well at all!!!

Interesting, though, throughout the entire 'experience', I KNEW I was OOB and was always looking for that 'signal' to go back, not because I wanted to, but because it was SO long!! It had to be the longest OBE ever! Yet, I was being allowed to stay and experience more and more, in such a joyous state!

One detail I recall was that I felt I needed to 'see' this friend - as I could not 'see' a physical form. I tried to use my 'eyes' to focus, but gave up after a while and just went with the total 'experience'....It was just so moving and emotional....

That began the first 'pull back' where I entered a mindstate where I knew I was 'waking' but believed I was truly awake! I was trying to record what had just happened (it was SO much to recall!) that I was upset I was already forgetting much of it!!! Then a second 'pull-back' began and I realized that I was NOT fully awake and recording, and with the full awake status, I forget even more!!!!

This double pullback always tells me that the OBE was of such a 'high level' state that my recall is not going to be much because I was so far 'out'. It feels like an entirely different way of 'understanding', a wholly different way of 'experiencing' that just cannot be put into words.

The entire OBE was all about 'experience' and what I felt was of such a high intensity that I just can't even begin to make others understand how it felt! SUCH a loving, joyous emotional state - and yet these words don't even begin to describe it!

Friday, August 7, 2009

109) Meeting Rory, Lessons Learned

8/06/09

My first ‘awareness’ for this OBE was of the ‘astral vision’ opening, where I am aware I lying on the couch but able to ‘see clearly’ into an opening in front of me. What I see is a man, dressed in medieval clothing walking around a stone building as if it trying to find a way in.

This ‘watching’ of the astral vision gave me the knowing that I was in the right state of mind for an OBE. However, I then heard someone walking toward the couch and questioned whether this was something real or a ‘false awakening’. I have learned that if I have any doubt as to my ‘reality’, then I am to remain quiet and unmoving, to let things unfold and see what happens.

A ‘male’ presence was now standing next to me on the couch. I could feel his anxiousness, as he stood there not speaking, yet giving me the ‘feeling’ of wanting something. I then realized I could feel someone’s hands holding my own hands above my head and yet another pair of hands holding my feet!! A small bit of fear rose in my mind with this anxious male standing nearby and both my hands and feet restrained! I wiggled my feet and tried affirming, “release them now!’ but without success.

Somehow I knew I could not let the ‘fear’ take control and my previous lesson of ‘sending love’ when faced with a fearful situation came back to me. I ‘sent love’ to the male, whereupon he exclaimed, ‘oh thank you! I just needed to know that you love me!’ and he disappeared!

I regained my composure now to ask, “who are you?” to the ones holding my hands and feet. Off to my side, I heard a female answer me, but was not able to understand the name. Three times I had to ask, before I was able to hear her name…Rory (rhymed with Lori) Skylar Rhondles….or something like that. I remember I used the mnemonic “ RSR” to remember her initials. (Her last name began with Rhon…but not sure how it ended)

It is a bit hazy as to what exactly happened next and in what order. She was an informally dressed young woman (20’s) who moved off to my left as I sat up on the couch. Whoever was holding my hands and feet was gone – in hindsight, it may have been their way of making sure I stayed in this area for Rory.

I asked, ‘What are you doing here?” and her reply was that she was trying to help others “marry off” so that she (or they?) could get a “well-deserved nap” (?) (Again, what made perfect sense while OOB makes no sense while awake!)

As she moved over to the floor to get something to eat (?), I realized I could no longer see her! I say, “I can’t see you!” and she replied, “But I’m right here in front of you!”

What I realized was that she was completely ‘in shadow’, as there was a bright light coming from behind me, and my positioning created a shadow that fell over her. As I leaned to the side, the light would shine on her and I could then see her again. I remarked, “I can’t see you when you are in the shadow” and she calmly replied, “oh, that’s right” like she was accustomed to dealing with type of situation.

On the floor beside us were small green ‘fuzz’ balls, and she replied, ‘come on, have some!’ indicating this was food to eat. I remember I tried to pick up these ethereal fluffy green balls but without any luck. (I recorded some reference to ‘cat food’ at this point, but have no idea where it fits in!)

“Oh, that’s right, you can’t eat it either!” was her remark. At this point, I thought that I should try to get back so that I could remember this experience, and for the first time, could actually feel my astral body return to my physical body! Usually, I just waken into consciousness without any memories of how I returned, but this time, I recall the entire movement from the floor and drifting gently back into the lying position on the couch!

Knowing I have to record this to remember the details, I find my recorder quickly but once again find it is broken! The buttons are all disconnected and I remember thinking that the ‘boys’ I lent it to previously must have broken it and didn’t tell me! My disappointment ended quickly as I returned to a full awake state and found the recorder in good working condition! (What I didn’t remember was that this broken recorder theme is another ‘false awakening’ that signals I am still not fully conscious!)

It seems that I may be getting a bit ‘rusty’ in my OOB experiences and my ability to recall previous lessons since I do not have the time to really focus on my OOBE learning right now. However, I am thankful to continue to have these small encounters to remind me that I have not forgotten everything I have learned!

Sunday, July 26, 2009

108) OOBEs - Intention is Everything

This is just a blog entry to say hello to everyone who reads this blog and to offer my apologies for not having much to post lately.

My OOB experiences have diminished greatly in content and quality, mainly becase I am finishing some advanced level training and eduation for the next 6 - 8 months and just don't have the time to focus on them as much as I used to.

However, they ARE still happening, but in a very brief and almost disappointing way. For instance, just last night, I recall actually getting out, although it was MUCH more difficult than usual (probably due to not keeping up with it).

I struggled to sit upright when I 'knew' I was ready to move out, and can even remember the 'pulling' sensation that pulled me back somewhat. However, I did move away, heading for the door, but got distracted by a wall nearby that had something interesting I wanted to look at!!

When I looked, I knew I could just go 'through' the wall, so I did! I recall feeling the texture changes and a falling sensation... .but then that was the end of it!!! Did I do more and not recall? or did I just go back? Very disappointing. ..but still...I was out!

Sorry for any disappointment, but no one is more disappointed than me!!

However, this does validate for me that it is the effort and determination that one 'intends' to put toward doing this that drives the success and frequency of their happening!!

So, for those who have the time and are having success, I'm waiting to hear from you!! Maybe that will motivate me a bit more!

Always eager to listen.....email me at karen659@yahoo.com

Sunday, July 5, 2009

107) Meeting NJ, Seeking Corinne, Teasing German, Higher self

It’s been a while since I’ve posted any more experiences here, but it’s not because I have not had any, but more due to the fact that they don’t seem to have the depth and degree of learning that I like to share with everyone. Nonetheless, I will post a synopsis of the previous three, just so you can make a determination for yourself whether it is useful to you or not.

June 14, 2009

With this experience, I became aware of that was already ‘out’ as there appeared to be a different ‘light’ to my surroundings. I knew I desperately wanted to go see NJ, so I set that intention, and could actually ‘feel’ hands grasping onto my hands. I pleaded with whomever it was holding my hand to take me to NJ!

Immediately I ‘felt’ the knowing that I didn’t have to wait for others to help me. I could just ‘intend’ to be there and go myself! I immediately felt the familiar backward movement with that thought, and amazingly could then ‘see’ NJ clearly, sitting in an armchair smiling broadly! It was with such clarity that I knew it had to be his ‘energetic’ self.

The scene quickly transitioned to a darker room, with him now lying on his side, and I remember I’m now yelling his name into his ear trying to wake him! In ‘physical time’, it was when he would be sleeping, so I am assuming that this second scene was the ‘physical’ position he was in and if his ‘astral self’ was already out, then no wonder I couldn’t wake him!

June 19, 2009

This experience started with another ‘false awakening’ that I am getting quite used to dealing with! This time, I’m sleeping on the couch and become aware that my daughter is walking up to the couch to see me. She bends over and kisses me, and I still ‘pretend’ to be asleep (as I have learned to ‘not react’ to familiar events while on the couch), and as she walks away, she playfully tugs at my blankets and pulls them off!

I am determined not to fully wake, even though I was pretty sure I’m lying there without covers! But I continue to ‘not react’ to see what happens, and sure enough, I find my legs floating in mid-air! (My sure signal that I’m ready to roll out!)

I did a slow roll out, getting out easily and clearly, and with the affirmation ‘to the door!’, moved away from the body. However, I remember finding myself flat on the floor on my face! Somehow I knew I just had to ‘intend’ to go where I wanted to go, I affirmed ‘to the door!’ once more and easily moved to the front door. (I know there was another exit through the side door this same night but I have no recollection of where I went!)

I took off flying from the front porch, and even though I ‘knew’ I needed to intend a destination, I wanted to first enjoy that freedom of flying and flipping!! I took the time to just swoop and dive, back flipping and spinning – just because it felt so good to do!

My next recollection is arriving in an area where there are people living in a tent-like covered area. There is a family here I’m with, and I know I’ve been here before. I’m helping them to get ready for some big wind storm, and there is a father with two daughters speaking to me as they lined up with others. He’s telling me that his three-year-old daughter had been left behind and he was worried about her! I knew immediately her name, Corinne, and I offered to go look for her. I remember yelling her name over and over, (Corinne!) in search of her.

My next recall finds me in a farm area, inside a barn, looking around for something. I notice a puppet-like character sitting above me in an alcove, playing a drum set! Not finding what I’m looking for, I move out of the barn to another area.

This time, I am in what ‘feels’ like a German factory building, and I felt there was danger here as I ‘feel’ like I’m supposed to be afraid (but I’m not, as I intuitively know that I cannot be harmed while in the astral!) There is something about the German military-type people here, and there is very limited recall. At one part, I do remember following behind this one soldier, knowing he couldn’t see me yet also knowing I wasn’t supposed to be there! (I could ‘sense’ the danger associated with it). Because I knew he couldn’t see me, I teasingly ‘blew some air’ at his back, and he immediately turned as if he felt it! Even though he acted like he couldn’t see me, I know he ‘knew’ someone was there!

I then hear this female voice off to the side tell me, “But I can see you!” which immediately made me think, ‘oh no!’ and I quickly moved away from that area! I left knowing I was ‘playing with danger’ in that situation.

Off to the side, I join in with some younger ‘ones’ playing with toys, waiting. (I notice I did not say ‘children’ in my recording, as I don’t feel they were actually children in that respect). I take note that their ‘toys’ are very similar to ours, as there is a piano-type toy, and another wind up one that spins and talks (similar to our ‘See-N-Say’ toy.) I remember it stopped on an animal (elephant), and it would tell you all about the elephant and what it is and does, something much more sophisticated than our toys here.

At this point in the recording, I know I am forgetting so many other details as I knew I was all over different areas, but I also know I never did find Corinne! Everything, as usual, fades so quickly with full awakening, and what I am left with is these bits and pieces.

July 3, 2009

Again on the couch, I become aware of slight buzzing, which feels more like a ‘fuzziness’ that brings my awareness to the conscious level. One thing I have learned is that if even if I am doubtful if I’m awake or pre-OOB, that I should always attempt the roll-out! That ‘question’ of reality at any time is a sure clue that you are NOT ‘in reality’ and need to move out!

I was excited to be out once again, and could move easily to the door using ‘clarity now!’ to see and felt the texture change as I passed through to the outdoors. I felt the cool air outside, and once again, took off flying to enjoy my freedom. I recall I had VERY clear thinking this experience, which made me remember I wanted to go ‘inward now!’ as my destination.

I affirmed ‘to my higher self!’, did a little spin to get things started, and then felt the usual familiar movement through darkness, indicating I was traveling. However, I was disappointed to see that when the movement stopped, I was still in my front yard!

Now I’m emphatically trying to go ‘to my Higher Self NOW!’ thinking if I said it with emotion, I’d get somewhere quickly. I now feel the same familiar backward movement in sitting position (as if riding a train), for a long time, but was disappointed once again, when I suddenly moved into a slow fade back to the couch by now hearing the waterfall I have outside my window as I transitioned to full awareness.

The feeling I had is that I DID go somewhere, but there is absolutely NO recollection of any events! I will just be hopeful that much of my learning is ongoing, on a higher level that is just not conducive to any conscious recall.

Sunday, June 7, 2009

106) Birthday Help and Visit from Guide

June 6, 2009

I am thrilled to receive a wonderful birthday OBE once again this year! Having had consistent OBEs the past two years on my birthday, the intention and expectation was strong enough for another successful experience. My intentions for this birthday, as usual, was to help others who need assistance and if possible, to have a visit from one who is at a higher level for me to speak with. Once again, request was granted! Though there is some limited recall, the ending presence of a higher being was unforgettable!

My first recollection was just a ‘knowing’ that it was time to roll out, so I did! This time it was easy, light, and I moved quickly to the side door. By the time I was at the door, my vision was becoming clearer (since it is almost always darkness for a while) and I can see the porch outside. I feel the change as I move through the door to the porch, where I ask to be taken to ‘where I need to go’.

I take off flying, once again SO enjoying the freedom of flight, doing the flips and turns of unencumbered movement! I see the treetops and surrounding hills, and even remember there was an animal below (dog?) that I tried to play with by picking up a stick and throwing it.

My next recollection of hearing music, but also being aware I’m back on the couch. Knowing that music is always a signal for moving OOB, I just look around and see it coming from the window near my head. It’s a 50’s type music (with the words,” hey,hey, hey, hey”) with a catchy tune and I’m singing along.

I remember thinking I’m at home and OOB, so I call out to no one in general, “is anyone there?” trying to see if there is one who needs help. Getting no response, I then remember that neither my stepson nor daughter is home tonight (true statement remembered while OOB about physical life). With that, I move to the bed room area where their rooms are located.

I stop outside the closed door to my stepson’s room, and realize everything ‘feels’ so solid and real! I am slightly confused as to whether I am OOB (as I thought I was) or actually in physical! I try to pull on the door, and can feel how solid it is as it opens.

As I look into the room, I am so surprised to see someone there! I think immediately that this must be my stepson and apologize for intruding, saying, “oh! I’m sorry! I was told you weren’t going to be home tonight!” I felt embarrassed, and found myself quickly back on the couch, where a younger 30-something male was waiting.

(In hindsight, I did not take the time to realize that the bedroom was totally different than ‘real’ life. There was a much larger bed, with fluffy comforters, positioned in such a way that it couldn’t have been my stepson. I may have been directed there to speak with the young boy in the bed, but due to my surprise and embarrassment, I left too quickly! I need to remember that emotions are to be kept in check while OOB, but the ‘physical realness’ of this situation made me unsure of my OOB status)

Now, back on couch, even though I am unsure of my OOB status, I don’t think twice about this strange male figure on the couch with me! I am talking comfortably with him, and he is telling me about how difficult it is to get his son to comply with something (traction?). He talking about 60/40, with the idea that he needs to be doing it 60% of the time, but just can’t get his son to listen. I get the feeling it is sports related (football?). The responses I gave to him were to make him realize he was the ‘parent’ and that he had to take the responsibility to enforce compliance with his son.

I remember telling him something to the effect, who is the boss anyway? who is the parent?, and if you tell him he can’t go to football if he doesn’t do his traction, then he must listen to you. The male is concerned because he also plays football and doesn’t want to stop his son from going as well. I impressed upon him that he was the parent and he needed to make the rules.

I was so certain I was still ‘in physical’ that I remembered I wanted to get back to my travels and hoped I still had time! I went to lie down on couch to try to get back to sleep and became aware that there were different people passing by! I have limited recall here, but I know I was back and forth on the couch talking to different people who are coming by and asking, “Can I help you?”

I vaguely remember one time I heard talking from above my head on the couch, and an elderly black male moved to my side. His voice was soft, halting, and he was speaking about his concern for his son. I don’t recall the exact reasons, because I was having a difficult time understanding him as he would whisper his words, trailing off, and I had to repeatedly ask him to speak louder and clearer. I have no idea what his concern was, but I felt I was there to comfort him and give him someone to talk to. I distinctly heard the name of a college near me, and feel perhaps this son may have something to do with that institution. Otherwise, his words were not clear enough for recall.

My memories here are not good, but I do remember hearing different kinds of music at both ends of the couch, and moving back and forth as I interacted with others. At one point, I heard a phone ring, and moving to that area, heard a small female voice say something about being ‘fearful’. It was unusual in that it was a tiny voice, with the impression of a tiny, tiny female – even to the point where I feel it could have been a ‘fairy’-type spirit. Again, I have no further recall of what I did.

The most impressive memory I have is what happened at the end of the experience. I am still on the couch, thinking I am ‘really awake’, yet not bothered at all by the number of people I am interacting with! Suddenly, I ‘feel’ a flash of light and a powerful presence that appears on my right on the couch.
Intuitively I know this is one who is at a more advanced level coming at my request, and I distinctly remember hugging her and remarking, “Oh good! Someone came as I asked!” Although I had no visual image, it was a female with a distinctly strong accent (one with lots of hard ‘g’ sounds) and a soft soothing voice, closely resembling British English speech. (I recall an experience previously where I have heard this same female accent)

The odd thing is the entire time she is with me, there is a ‘hand’ over my face, as I could feel the fingers of a right hand keeping my eyes covered, and resting lightly on my cheek. I am not sure if it was my own ‘astral’ hand, or someone else’s.

She spoke with me in a matter-of-fact manner, answering my questions in a manner that I felt I was to pay attention to. I asked, “Am I not ready? Am I doing it right?” (in hindsight, I am not sure what I meant by ‘ready’!) and her response was, ‘no but that would be worth the 15 minutes to get here, to listen for me and what I say, and then we would have all the time in the world to do anything!’

Her words were more ‘feeling’ than words, and it left me with the message that I need to devote more time, even 15 minutes a day, to reaching that mind state where contact can be made with my guides. The more I do it, the easier it will become and the better connection I can have with those who guide me. I also understand that though it may be only 15 minutes in ‘real world’ time, there is much that can be accomplished because within the astral and upper dimensions there is no ‘time and space’ to limit me.

At this time, I remember there could have been more to our conversation, but my memories faded very quickly with full awakening.

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

105) Breakfast visit, Volcanic yard, Mediterranean visit

It's been a long time since I've posted here, not because my experiences have stopped, but because there isn't much 'productivity' in what I am remembering! In hindsight, though, I realize perhaps there are some things that others can learn from, so I've taken the time to write up the last three experiences in one post. As always, please feel free to email me if you have any insight or comments!

5.16.09

This experience began with the usual false awakening in that I heard my husband come down to the couch where I was sleeping and lean over me, as if to talk. Keeping very still and not responding, I was able to realize I was close to exiting.

I rolled out and moved quickly out the front door to the rooftop, as I wanted to experience the freedom of flying again. I was on top of a very tall building now, and could see to the street below, knowing full well that I could ‘dive over’ the edge without fear….so I did! I did say ‘clarity now!’ a few times, but without much effect. I don’t have a lot of recall, but I remember a helicopter flew by at one time, and I was going in and out of the clouds….

The second exit this night I felt I was out a very long time. Initially I remember seeing people go by in the room. At one point I took a woman’s hand and asked, please take me to see N.J.! The next I recall was hearing what sounded like breakfast being eaten, with the clinking of a bowl and talking back and forth between a man and woman. I couldn’t see anyone, but remember I then went outside the house and saw some gardens. (These actions, although very vague, were validated as a possible connection.)

Having read about energy points we all have surrounding us, I attempted to reach out to the front where I was told one was located. Nothing happened. I then reached out to my left, and as soon as I touched what felt like warmth, I quickly moved up and out of body to my dining room and out the window! It all happened so fast, as if I was full of energy!

I’m flying around and at one point, there was what I thought felt like trembling of an earthquake and I couldn’t tell what was real and what wasn’t anymore! I am not sure what happened as my recall again is very limited and the experience faded shortly thereafter.

Again, I remember fumbling with the recorder, and when things were not going right, knew I was not fully awake and pulled myself to a more conscious awareness in order to record what little I remember.

5.25.09

This experience was more of a lucid dream recall in that I was not aware of any exit or control of my situations. There may be a bit of symbolism here as I found my front yard covered with hardened lava from a volcanic eruption. Trenches were being dug into the hardened lava, and there were men there working diligently to get these trenches dug.

At some point in this dream I remember an explosion that occurred…no other information except that I could physically feel the ‘impact’ of it happening!

Walking along one ‘trench’, I knew that on one side I had all my good ‘plants’ that were now covered with this hardened lava, but I was content to know that at least they were ‘safe’. Now I knew it was time to start digging them back up, and I wasn’t sure how to go about it! I remembered thinking that at least it was nice cool weather for this type of hard work!

5.27.09

My first recollection after ‘waking’ was that my arms and legs were floating all about, my usual signal that it’s time to roll out. However, I found I just couldn’t move! I eventually was able to just ‘push’ myself off the couch, and rolled onto the floor, flat on my face!

Moving slowly and heavily over to the dining room, I knew I could just move down into the earth by ‘intention’ since I was so low anyway! As I started, I realized there was not much below me (in my basement) or the earth that I wanted to see so with that thought, quickly found myself back on the couch.

The next few exits were also not very productive but I will share them anyway. I actually am not even sure in which order these next exits occurred but I will at least show what happened with each.

During one exit, I remember I tried calling out for ‘Richard’ (my guide’s name – see blog #78 ) in hopes he could help me separate easier. I held my arms up, hoping to feel my hands being held, and needing to know that my guides are with me. I didn’t get any response that I can recall.

In another exit, I remember how difficult it was to move, and that as I passed through the glass on my side door (as I have done easily before), I could actually ‘feel’ the glass stretch with me not allowing me to pass through easily!

With another exit, I also remembered to try to ‘reach out’ for the energy centers that surround me, feeling for the one in front and to the left (the one that worked before!). This time, nothing happened, and I even remember trying to reach for both at the same time in order to ‘make a circuit’ in hopes that it would help. But, this time…nothing.

At some point, I became aware that my arms and legs were floating again and found myself out easily this time, thinking and ‘seeing’ so clearly! I got outside and knew I wanted to go visit a particular person. I found myself in a very long pullback, one where I am traveling backward, up high, watching the different scenes fade away as if I am moving rapidly. It appeared to be various cities and countries that I was moving away from. At one point I remembered I could just ‘think’ of where I wanted to be and didn’t have to travel this long distance with the pullback.

With that, I dropped to a street level, watching these ‘Michelangelo’ type statues (Italian feel) moving about on bikes on a street. There were people all around, and my next recollection was of a small Italian type villa I moved into.

The small room had a Mediterranean feel (mix of Italian, French, Spanish) and there was a heavy wooden table in the center, with an older man and young boy standing by (waiter-type feeling). I felt I was to meet someone here, and started calling out for my friend I wanted to meet. I distinctly remember standing at the doorway calling out his name!

My next recall was sitting at that table, with two men – one ordering a tall light red colored drink with ice, and the one male telling me that only I was able to share this drink with him. There was much more, but my recollection didn’t allow me to recall any more except that there was more!

Another exit I found myself on the front porch with such clear thinking and knew I was able to do anything I wanted to do! I even remember how easily it was to pass through the front door, feeling the change in ‘cool air’ once outdoors. A long pullback occurred, but this time I ended up at a picnic type event, one with a red, white and blue (patriotic) theme.

I was having such fun, and felt that this was the type of event I wanted to be able to organize for my own community. It would be something for the people to come together and have fun and I felt it would be easy enough for me to do!

The night once again ended with my fumbling with my voice recorder, and again knowing that I was not fully awake. I tried to impress my key words (from the experiences) into my consciousness, as I forced myself more fully awake to find the recorder. Alas, upon full awakening, all I had left were these few memories in bits and pieces that I have to tried to piece back together again!

Saturday, May 16, 2009

104a) Comments - discussion

I thought I'd post a copy of the comment section that added some discussion about the experience. Please feel free to add anything via comments or email. The more we share, the more we learn! Thanks Jurgen, Dave, & Phil!

Hi Karen, this is really fascinating. In my own experience blindness occurs, when I haven’t quite moved out of the physical energy field, which means you are in an in-between state. You can’t see either the physical nor the non-physical, as you are not quite in the next dimension close to the physical. Once I make the transition into to next dimensional counterpart, the sight returns, but I don’t see any longer the physical. Have you noticed that sometimes it may look like your physical room, but things are slightly different such as a carpet where there isn’t one in the physical? This is generally a good indication that one has made the transition into the next dimensional counterpart of the physical.

Interesting concept, however, how does this explain that sometimes I am totally 'blind', yet by affirming 'awareness now!' or 'clarity now!' I am then able to see?! Maybe this affirmation just moves me more fully into the proper 'vibrational' status to see. I also think there are times I just am not meant to see, as it is more important that I develop my 'other senses' by not relying on vision as much.

I think you are right, affirmation puts you clearly into the right mode. I noticed this also applies to other things, if there are barriers or such. In my case vision seems to be the primary focus although I have experienced taste and smell.

Yes, also, I understand what you mean by things are never fully the same as in physical, This is an observation I made lots of times and led me to conclude that we are then in a higher dimensional counterpart which is partly influenced by our thought or those of other people, here in physical or over there. I wonder whether you have noticed when you went higher up that you thought you knew the place, identifying it solely by its atmosphere, perhaps as a certain place such a a specific town, although it was unrecognisable, looking different etc, but still "feeling" like the place you knew.
only a vague similarity, enough to 'remind' you that you are out! I use the differences I find as another 'signal' that helps me remain in full awareness of the fact that I am definitely out of body, as I still have many times when I question that possiblity! A big learning for me occurred when I made the realization that if I ever 'question' my OOB status, that would definitely be a signal that I was!! When you are 'in physical', there is NO question that you are!! lol This is a really obvious and good trick and quite frankly it has never really occurred to me.

Interesting too that you could feel the “arms of the chair”. You most definitely felt the arms of the astral counterpart of the physical chair. It’s impossible to physically feel the physical chair when out of the body although one can still get a sensation of the physical in very much the same way as “psychics” get a sensation of non-physical things. So when you “physically” felt something its a good indication that you felt the astral counterpart of the chair. I just assume that its an indication that I am not 'fully' into the higher vibrational status, because I am able to 'retain' my memory of physical touch yet also move through things! IMO, there are many 'levels' of vibrational existence, I refer to these as dimensions, but I am sure its the same thing and (what is memory anyway?)
and we can go through multiple levels each time we exit. I never know until I'm out if I'm going to be in the lower, heavier state, or the much fun, lighter, free-er realm! Sometimes I get a mix of many!

The other thing that was very interesting was that you were aware of a beautiful summer day, which could have been the scenery on the next dimension, but the “blindness” which I think is caused by etheric matter still clinging to you after separation, prevented you from breaking through. I really wonder whether it is also this “etheric” matter causing the difficulty in moving about when separating from the body. It seems to be a gluey substance which needs to be broken to enter the next dimension freely. Now this is an interesting concept, and perhaps another 'reason' for the different levels as described above. Not only are there multiple vibrational realms of existence, but it woud also depend upon the level of 'etheric matter' you bring with you. IMO, this level of 'etheric matter' may depend upon your physical state upon exit, your current 'belief system', or any other subconscious/conscious thoughts you have at that time! I agree with you. Curiously I only experienced those things when I first started out thirty odd years ago, I seem to snap through these and wonder whether meditation has something to do with it.

Fascinating to read about another entity near you. I always refer to it as my “silent companion”. They never seem to say much, but generally there seems to be a feeling that one is in good hands. No doubt they’re having fun watching us. Yes, many times I 'sense' the silent companion with me, or perhaps even with the others who come to me. It's an understanding you have while out and moving about that they are there for assistance should you need it, and many times I have if you read the blog! (I'll never forget the words, 'Shields up!' that were firmly stated when I met that negativity in one experience! -- #59 June 2008) Have you ever seen him or her and if so did you recognize them as your "silent companion". Are the always the same person or people? For many experiences, the male silent companion has been the same one and I finally did learn his name in another OBE (see # 78). There has also been a familiar female companion many times, however, her identity is not known.

Interesting your conversation with the woman. I once listened (out-of-body)to my brother having a conversation with his college at his work 1200 miles away. It was as if I was right next to them and listened attentively to every word of the very technical conversation. I even wondered whether it would have been fun to memorize it and tell my brother, but decided in the end that it wasn’t worth the hassle as my brother doesn’t believe in this “mambo-jumbo”.It is easy to tune into the general thought content of the atmosphere which sounds like talking or listening to several radio stations at once. Like Dave, I wonder whether you tuned into an incarnate woman’s mind or whether you made contact with a discarnate person? That 'radio' voice, or voices, is a common occurence many times and I have just learned to use it as a signal that I am about to exit. Initialy I used to think it was just the TV that was left on, but now I assume it is just the 'noise' of the universe as I can tell it's not directed at me or talking to me. Some people say its tuning into global thought frequency just before exit.

From Dave - Any idea who this woman is? A living person? A past person? A currently non-living person? I have no idea who this particular woman was, only that she needed help in some way. I am assuming it is one who may not even be aware she is 'passed on' and is living in a world of her own creation, similar to her life on Earth, in which all her desires and thoughts are realized.

It is a type of 'belief system' realm that keeps some souls from moving on, due to their inability to be 'open' to other possibilities. I had no 'visual' information, only 'sense' and touch. I just felt she needed to be guided to look for help in order to unlock her 'beliefs' that kept her there.

For my own benefit: what would you say was your sense of awareness during most of this? Like it is in a dream? Like a lucid dream? Like normal life? More awake then normal life? Honestly, it depends on the type of OBE it is!! You will see lately it's been 'near-physical' and very heavy sensations, where the degree of lucidity, control, and clear thoughts are limited. The higher experiences, where I am in a higher vibrational state and feel lighter and free-er, then the awareness level and thought processes are so clear!

What is interesting that is that my awareness is much like it is while fully awake! That's what people don't realize when they believe it's a 'dream' or get OOB. It is dismissed as not 'real' because there is little difference in their 'thinking' while awake, and those while OOB!

How do you distinguish an actual OBE from a dream? Or do you consider them both potentially equally real, yet different than waking reality? Tough to describe the difference, but you just KNOW there is one. Many times, however, there is little difference as well!! Honestly? It's easier if you don't try to analyze what's going on...if you find yourself in what you think is a dream, then it'll be a dream. If you take that dream, and become aware within it, then you can convert it to an OBE if you so wish! Again, it's your perceptions and beliefs that guide what you feel and do...the best I can say is to just 'let go', don't analyze so much, and believe in what you are doing!

Thursday, May 7, 2009

104) Help by Holding a Hand

Hi everyone! I finally have another OBE to share with you and its interesting how the fact that my other 'near-physical' OBE's were just a prelude to why I needed to learn how to use this state of awareness.

5.7.09 Holding Hand Retrieval

I moved to the couch and intended to get OOB, as it has been long stressful few weeks for me, and my physical life needs would always override my ability or strong intention to get OOB.

This time, however, as life is beginning to settle a bit (or I’m just dealing with it better! lol) I wanted to try once again. Soon after getting into the hypnagogic state, and possibly even falling asleep, I became aware of hearing voices.

It feels as though I’m listening to a radio station, with voices and conversations that do not have anything to do with me. This slight awareness allows me to focus a bit more on my ‘physical’ sensations, and I realize there is the vibrational tingling and my legs begin to float.

This is my usual signal that I’m ready to separate, but once again, it feels so ‘heavy’ I cannot do my usual rollout. I have to push myself upright to a sitting position, still feeling the tingling, so I know I’m separating.

I am unsteady at first, as it’s been a while since I’ve been out! I pull myself to move away from my body, and I’m not very ‘clear’ on my thinking and remember I have to affirm ‘to the door!’ and try to get my thoughts in the right ‘frame’ so I can move.

I affirm ‘to the door!’ a few times, knowing the direction of the front door, but end up having to ‘physically move’ my legs to walk in that direction. As I pass the living room chairs, I reach out and can physically FEEL the arms of the chair, and as I pass between them I know there is a coffee table that I am passing through!!

I can feel the texture change as I pass through the table, yet I can still reach out and ‘physically’ feel the edge of the coffee table! That was most unusual for me!!

As I got to the front door, I opened it as I would have if I was in physical. On the front porch, I could feel the change to ‘cool air’ and then realized I didn’t have to open that door that way! It is pitch black with no vision at all, only an ‘awareness’ of what is out there.

I am suddenly startled to hear the slamming of two car doors, and ‘sense’ two people getting out of car in my driveway. There is only one female talking, and I heard something like ‘What do you think, Alfred?” as if she was talking to the other one who got out of the car with her.

I wonder who is coming, but remained calm enough to ask, ‘Who’s there?’ as they approached. She answered me with her name, but I cannot recall what it was, and I know I asked her at least three times to repeat it because her speech was not clear. (I believe it was similar to Lisette, or Lisa, but I am not sure.)

She continue to talk, loudly and animatedly, and I remember thinking that I’m not understanding a lot of what she is saying and am asking her to repeat many times.

I then took a special note to listen intently at one point, and I clearly heard what is medically termed ‘flight of ideas’, as in her conversation/answer was not appropriate nor understandable in terms of what she was trying to convey. I felt immediately that this was an educated woman in her thirties, with some sort of mental instability, yet very pleasant and easy to get along with.

I engaged her in conversation right where I was, standing on the sidewalk in front of my house. I could still see nothing except darkness, yet I sensed who she was but can give no physical details for a description. The conversation was difficult at first, with the words she spoke that did not appear to have meaning or context.

However, I was guided to take her right hand in my left hand, and I could then PHYSICALLY feel that sensation of holding her hand! Just the same as I did when I physically felt the chairs and table before exiting the house!

Upon holding her hand, I could immediately sense a ‘connection’ and understanding, and I was able to converse with her easily. She was telling me all the different things she like to do, and I remember one question I asked was, “Are you happy here?” in order to get a sense of direction where to go.

She reluctantly answered ‘Yes, but…..’ trailing off and indicating there was some discontent. She then told me she wished it wasn’t ‘summertime’ all the time, indicating to me that I needed to build on this statement. (I recall the sense of a beautiful summer day when we spoke, even though upon fully awakening it was 4am and pouring rain!)

I do not recall the entire conversation, however, I was guided to ask, “Have you ever thought about having a different life? or visiting a different world?”, not really knowing where my words were coming from!! She said, ‘that would be so nice!’ and I ‘felt’ it was rather boring there for her so I continued on by asking, “I have my friend inside the house who would love to tell you all about other lives and worlds, maybe you could come in with me and we’ll talk.” (Again, I knew I had to get her to ‘look’ for the help that was there)

She followed me to the front porch door and as we stepped up, the fading pullback began. I slowly aroused to the sound of pouring rain, and the clock chiming 4am. During the entire experience I was aware someone else was with us, but there was no interaction at all between us.

I would like to think that perhaps my ‘physical’ touch was what was needed to get her to ‘focus’ on our conversation and bring here awareness to the point where she could ‘look for’ additional help.

I never know completely whether I am successful, however, I have the inner knowing that it is because I still remain partly in that ‘physical’ state while OOB, it gives me that added ability to offer assistance to those who remain so closely connected to the lower physical realm.

(See Comments for additional info)

Sunday, April 12, 2009

103) Meeting Aaron; Finally Flying Free Again!

4.12.09 Easter Sunday morning

I am on my couch having set the intention to go ‘inward now’ should I be able to get OOB. My first awareness was that there were two other females with me as I was lying on the couch. I didn’t think too much of it as we were ‘waiting’ for something and passing the time making up fun things to do.

For fun, I remember I took a belt? (like a soft bathroom belt) and formed it into a lasso and attempted to lasso the one female’s pocketbook/case she was carrying as she moved toward the front door, seeing how I had to throw the belt just the right way to properly connect with it.

Suddenly the front door blasts open and a figure rushes into the room and toward the couch where I am lying!! I am startled at first, but somehow realize I have to maintain emotional control and as usual, just ‘go with it’.

What I see/feel is a young man, short and round in stature, and obviously affected with Down’s syndrome. He runs to me with such happiness and joy, and starts kissing, kissing, kissing me all over my face! I say ‘what’s going on? Who are you?’ and he quietly replies “Aaron”.

I am still startled at his overwhelming gratitude and love, and ask again, “who?” and he repeats, “Its Aaron! I love you!, I love you!, I love you!” I ask ‘why are you doing this?’ and he says something about ‘ the last time…’ which gave me the knowing I was with him before and he was SO happy to see me again!

As he says again, “I just love you!” I realize I am OOB, so I sit up on the couch and he climbs in next to me, continuing to kiss and hug me! I feel such overwhelming joy and gratitude from him, and I do think, ‘Now what am I going to do with him?...what do I do now?”

Not getting any further information, I decide to move on and say to him, “I’m happy you’re so happy, Aaron, but I have to go!” knowing I was once again OOB in the lighter, freeing state of being (as compared to the more recent OBEs with the close to physical heaviness).

Without looking back (which is rather selfish of me, in hindsight!), I move away to the dining room area intending to get outside quickly. Once I was by the dining room window, I dove through the glass, feeling that tingly sensation as I passed through into the cool crisp outside air.

I realize it is wintertime! (Actually, it’s just becoming spring here now, so the snow and ice was a surprise to find!) Crisp white snow is covering the ground, with the trees and branches sealed in ice crystals and everything is SO beautiful! I’m flying toward the tree tops, a bit slower than usual, but still with such lightness and joy that I am so thrilled to be out again, saying “I missed this SO much!” over and over!

At that point there was a quick transitional pullback, and I knew I was returning. Intending to record what I could remember, I find the recorder, but when I attempt to speak, all I hear is a muted ‘blah, blah, blah’ and the recording doesn’t work! Again, I use this signal as another chance to get back OOB, but also knowing that I was taking the chance that I would not remember all the details!

This time I moved toward the front door and as I get closer to it, the usual ‘fear’ that I may not be really out comes over me and I turn to float through the door backward face up!! Once outside, I can feel the tingling sensations of ice or raining coming down and SO enjoying the flying freedom!!

I am just overwhelmed with a sensation of joy and bliss I want to shout, but instead I start singing the entire song, “Mine eyes have seen the glory…...His Truth is marching on!” (Battle Hymn of the Republic) with such feeling and emotion (a la Kate Smith! Lol) I am SO full of love and joy and am enjoying the beauty of the countryside below me.

I am over a wide open area, slightly depressed as in a lower elevation, and barely recall something about a tractor there? I am just singing and flying and being so captivated with it all!! At one point, I remember blasting through some thick barbed bushes, knowing I could go through anything if I wanted to!

Recall here is very limited, and I believe I just started fading back at some point. Once again, I’m thinking I’m recording, but again I can’t get the switch to work right and the light won’t come on. This time, knowing that I will definitely forget too much if I go back out, I force myself more awake to the point where I know I am getting my recorder for real.

Suddenly the memories start to fade SO quickly! I can remember so much in that semi-awake stage, but once fully awake and ready to really record, everything disappears so easily and I have to use the ‘walk backward’ through the events to try to remember even these details.

So, after having my share of lower level physical OBEs, I finally had the chance to reconnect to the beauty and love of being in a higher lighter state of projection. It is just SO wonderful to be there again! The joy remains with you even after you are awake!

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

102) Ignored Signals in Near-Reality; 6/28/56

4/5/09

This OBE is again nothing like my usual experiences, and seems to have a degree of ‘near-reality’ in it that is just SO convincing that THIS time I pay no attention to the various signals (anomalies) that would indicate I am OOB! I really don’t know what is going on with my projections!

For this experience, I am in my usual spot on the couch and find that I am having a harder time to settle down than usual. I am very tired, yet cannot sleep. It seems that I just get to that right ‘mindstate’ and suddenly I hear my husband coming down the stairs to try to convince me to go back to bed!

Normally, this would signal a false awakening for me, as this has happened many times before, however, this time it ‘felt’ different. I was SO tired, and SO annoyed that he’d wake me, I just rolled off the couch and moved toward the stairs to go upstairs to bed. I feel SO heavy, like I’m drugged - having difficulty even opening my eyes as I move! I just can’t seem to pull them open! (In hindsight, it was the same ‘feeling’ I had when previously OOB and aware of it, in trying to get some vision within an experience)

I move heavily into the bedroom and I remember all I want to do is sleep because I feel SO heavy and tired! Yet, things start happening all at once! My husband brings me my cell phone, saying that the hospital is on the line. I take it as I am concerned there is another emergency that I may have to go in for. Then the house phone rings, and as I KNOW it’s only 3am (which it really was!), so I answer it again concerned it could be the hospital.

I am so disgusted to find out it’s a sales call!! Some voice wanting to sell me some sort of ‘announcement service’ to let me know when school is out! I can recall trying to push the phone buttons to get to a ‘real’ person, and when I do, I ask her why she calling me at 3am to tell me about this!! She does apologize and tells me she won’t bother me again.

Now my daughter (who doesn’t even live with me) shows up in the bedroom, carrying on about something that I can’t even make sense of! Her words are garbled, and she’s talking about something that needs to be straightened out. I feel SO TIRED I can’t even concentrate on her words, and she gets annoyed and goes back to her bedroom, laughing and talking with others who are there. I remember thinking, “What is she doing still up and visiting with her friends at 3am!!”

Before she left, though, I was ‘handed’ a rose…and the rose was being held in a man’s arm/hand! The fingers were tightly wrapped around the rose, and the arm just ended at the shoulder level. I’m thinking, “This is a real arm! It even has hair on it! Who would want to give someone a hairy arm holding a rose? Do they even realize it came off of a real person??” I place the arm and rose on my bedside table, and watch as the fingers move to encircle other ‘fingers’ that I have there!

(Now, you would think with all these ‘signals’ that I would have been able to realize I was out of body!!! Yet, I felt SO heavy, SO dense, and SO TIRED that I just assumed it all was real!)
I finally fell asleep in bed, wondering why so many things were happening to me in the middle of the night to try to keep me awake! I then found myself transitioning to full wakefulness - still on the couch with nothing going on at 4am!

I tried to return to sleep and became aware of being in full vibrations. I rolled out, and again, I see my husband next to me, trying to get my attention by talking to me about something. I tell him I’m busy, and I need to do my work, and just then notice a man walking into the room from my left behind my husband. I felt I needed to talk to him, so excused myself and went after him. I asked, “Can I help you? Where are you going?” as he walked through the living room to the French doors by the hallway.

He is saying something about being a patient of mine ‘from the other night’ and told me his birthdate of 6/28/56. I remember asking him to repeat it as I was unsure of the year being ‘56 or ‘60. He again emphatically told me the date which I have recorded as 6/28/56. My feeling was that this date was being impressed upon me as something I needed to remember.

I asked him again where he was going, and he answered, “No where”. I was feeling frustrated and blank, not being able to think of what I should do next because I was rather overwhelmed to think this was a patient I had/would have!

The experience then faded rather quickly and I was left with the feeling that I may have asked the wrong questions or that it was just more important that I remembered that date. I don’t usually get such specific details when OOB, so I do try to take note when one is impressed upon me.

Once again, I am sharing this experience even though I did not take note of the signals to gain control of the experience. However, it was so different in its ‘feel’ that I don’t think I was capable of thinking clearly enough to become aware! The second part was so much ‘lighter’ in feel, just as many of other experiences are, but still rather unfulfilling unless I find out what that date could mean!

COMMENTARY: What I feel/know now is that there are so many degrees of 'physical-ness' one can experience as you progress inward/outward toward the higher level experiences.

IMO, I believe having already experienced the fun, joy, lightness, and freedom that the higher realms give us has allowed me to differentiate better between these lower more dense physical experiences.

I am finding out that even within each level of experience, there are varying degrees of 'sensation' and awareness. I just need to find out and learn how to bring more 'awareness' into the lower ones so that perhaps I can utilize this physical sense more with others I may find there.

In thinking about it, this learning could even play into the many discussions as to whether lucid dreams are OBEs and vice versa. As with all things, there cannot be a basis for comparison unless there is something to compare it too!

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

101) Gaining Confidence

4/01/09

My first recollection of this experience is the music and loud noise coming from the living room where I was sleeping. I felt I was fully awake and should go investigate where this music was coming from. Realizing that the room appeared just a bit different than it really does, I gives me the ‘awareness’ that I am in another ‘false awakening’ and use this to roll out of body. I affirm, ‘to the door!’ and move slowly, feeling a VERY strong pulling sensation back to body.

Realizing I am not going to make it to the door, I change direction to the hallway near my daughter’s bedroom. Now I hear excited barking! Without hesitating, I call for the dogs to come, and immediately see two smaller dogs appear in the hall. The smaller one is light brown, longer hair, and has a familiar sense that I attributed to my younger childhood days, as he excitedly jumps up on me. The other dog is slightly bigger, black/brown, shorthair and a little more reserve but very friendly. He comes up to me and nuzzles me contentedly, as if to say hello.

Looking up, I see in the doorway a large black/brindle dog that hesitates before entering. I feel a slight apprehension, but then realize it is more of a timid feeling coming from this big dog, and coax him to join the other two at my side.

I hug him and rub his short hair, noticing that his right eye is missing and his coat is matted. Sitting in the hallway playing with these dogs, I sense a presence standing in the doorway to my daughter’s room. It is an older, stocky, tall white male with short grey hair and small ‘blotches’ scattered throughout his face. He is non-threatening, but distant (timid?), and I realize he is there to talk to me.

His question is recorded as, “How’s your ‘sex appeal’ (but the word felt like confidence) for working with us? Can you help us (those of us) in this ‘population’? (Other than the specific words ‘sex appeal’, ‘help’, and ‘population’, the question was more of a feeling than specific words.) I understood what he was saying, and gave my consent to help in any way I could, knowing he meant the ‘population’ was those in spirit, both human and animal.

He and the dogs now fade away, and I try to locate my recorder to record what I can. I find it in pieces, and I’m attempting to put it back together. Realizing this is usually the signal for a ‘false awakening’, and instead of pulling myself more awake, I now use this signal to try to roll out again (even though I know I may not remember many details if I continued to another experience!)

I am successful in finding myself standing back in the living room where I was sleeping, and the room again looked slightly different (which gave me the validation I WAS still OOB). I approached the front door to go outside, and took the time to try to see if my hand could go through as usual. I was astonished to feel that it was solid! I pushed against it two more times, knowing I was out of body, but just amazed that I couldn’t pass through it!

I gave up and just opened the door the regular way, feeling the cool breeze of the morning air as the door opened. I kept saying, “This is not right, I know I’m out!”, so continued on, just ‘going along’ with what was happening.

Once outside, I tried flying a little, floating slightly upwards enjoying the freedom of being out but with a knowing that I was still ‘grounded’ and not able to go far. With that thought, I found myself flat on the ground, seeing and smelling the green grass under a tree in the front yard.

From my spot in the front yard, I could see my father’s truck come into the driveway, pulling a wagon filled with stuff like he’s going to clean up around the yard. My daughter was now there, and she is coming toward me. I somehow ‘know’ I am lying here (in my nightgown!) aware she is coming for the jeans that she left nearby, but unaware of my presence (I get the feeling I am ‘not in this picture’ at this time). This is quite confusing here, but I’m writing what I recorded!! lol

My husband, her stepfather, is also in the front yard now, and they are conversing quite civilly about things she just inherited that would be useful for the new people who are coming. I remember their conversation because it is registered as quite unusual to hear them to talk to each other in such a polite way.

Next I recall, I am now accompanying my daughter up to the house, yet this house (the one I just came out of!) has had the front door boarded up for a long time, and we are going to attempt to get in.

Just as we get inside the house, everything starts to fade and I realize I have to try to recall as much as I can. Again, I find the recorder in pieces; however, this time I pull myself to a more awake state and search for it again. I find it as I feel the heaviness of ‘full return’ and record what I could remember.

For some clarity here, I will say there are MANY changes going on in my life right now with regard to people in my life. I believe much of the ending of this experience probably an indication that this change will be for the better in all avenues of my physical life right now, and I am hoping the agreement to help with those in spirit indicates my increased confidence in moving forward with spiritual growth as well.

I only hope my ‘grounding’ of the experiences ends soon as I long to travel and experience that lightness and joy that usually accompanies those trips to the higher astral levels!

Saturday, March 21, 2009

100) Sending Love - Successful!

Hi everyone! Things here in 'real life' have been quite busy with some very stressful situations and health concerns over the past few weeks. Experiences have continued, but not to the degree that there is much information that I feel others can learn from.

However, this experience has a few 'new' aspects, so I'm sharing that latest. I welcome any insights, comments, or thoughts!

3/18/09
This experience offered once again more new experiences for me. In retrospect, I feel I have had so much to do and take care of in the past few weeks with my ‘physical life’ that my astral body is trying to compensate by giving me what I need to balance.

Just prior to sleep with this experience, and knowing that I have not had the chance to help others while OOB in a long time, I do recall a brief ‘thought’ that impressed upon mind that this time I just might get my wish. However the difference was, this time they came to me!

I went to my ‘traveling’ couch at 3am per my usual routine. As I’m lying there, I get the typical altered sensations (floating, soft buzzing) that indicates I’m about ready to separate. Instead of just rolling out as usual, I find my legs floating vertical in the air! Now this is common for me as a signal to roll, however, I couldn’t move! I question whether perhaps I really DO have my legs this high, but also realize it just isn’t possible.

While lying there, feeling my legs floating and not able to roll out, I have a sense of someone coming from the kitchen area. I feel slight apprehension, as I see a very strong male (energy) shadow moving toward me, talking animatedly and emphatically, as he towered over my body lying on the couch!

My initial reflexive reaction was to put my hand up to him and said “Stop!”, however upon doing so, immediately knew I should not do that and then said, “I send you love”! He stopped, calmed a bit, and with this success, I also visualized sending loving energy to him, which improved his overall ‘sense’ quite a bit. He was able to talk more coherently to me now, and at the time, I knew what we were discussing but there is no memory now. I only have the impression he was explaining something, and just needed to talk.

He faded out and now I felt the presence of another smaller female, hunched over, next to the couch in the same spot he faded from. It was a much older woman, quiet and non-threatening, and I asked, “what can I help you with?” She mumbled something softly, and the conversation is again not recalled, however I do remember sending her love as well.

She faded after a short time and once again, a very animated, almost agitated, middle-aged female appeared in her place. She was talking loudly and waving her arms about. I recall only scraps of information about our conversation, something about products, and TV, and things she needs or was interested in. Because I had already started sending love with the other two, and with her strong energy appearance, it was easy to calm her down and just talk to her without any concerns or fear.

At some point, she faded, and I became aware of my moving feet. This time I realized I could now roll out! I stood up next to the couch, amazed at the ‘strength’ of solidness I felt! However, I couldn’t move! Once again, I try ‘to the door!’ and when that didn’t work, ‘to the outside!’

Now realizing I could see (usually I’m in darkness initially), my orientation was a bit confused. Although I felt as though I was facing my dining room, it appeared to me that my living room bay window was in front of me! Without questioning my orientation ‘status’ (as it was much more important that I get out, not caring which direction!) I just affirmed, ‘to the outside!’ while looking at the window.

VERY slowly, I begin to move, so I say ‘to the window’, ‘to the outside’ – ANYthing to move! I’m drifting slowly, very slowly….and it feels as though I am not ‘in control’ of this one. So, I just ‘let go’ and remember it doesn’t’ matter where I go out, as long as I get out! Lol

I start to move up to the ceiling, and think, ‘oh this is great!’ as I’ll get to experience the texture changes as I pass through so slowly. Indeed I do, first the ceiling, then the attic area, through the roof and then to the outside – each feeling so different in texture and sensation.

I am moving SOoooo slowly, finally breaking through to the outside, seeing clouds and birds, and even something that I’m not sure what it was while flying (this is what I recorded – very limited memories here).

I am enjoying the drifting and floating, getting so comfortable and relaxed. I even recall knowing I could take part of the cloud to use as a pillow! I was so content and at peace, not really going anywhere, but just enjoying the open expansiveness and peaceful feelings. The sense of freedom and comfort was immense.

When I came back to couch, there was another ‘first’ I can remember doing. I had to actually “turn around” to get into the right position as I’m getting back in body. I somehow knew I had to re-enter differently, but I really don’t know how I knew!

I am aware I have so much to record and am now trying to bring myself awake slowly while trying to find recorder. It’s hard to describe, but I knew I wasn’t awake enough to get it working so I hung onto the memories as much as I could while trying to wake even further. However once I was fully awake to record, I still lost so many memories.

I am find this happening more and more often, with deep memories holding while slowly waking, using attempts to bring them to the surface with signal words, but losing the ‘idea’ behind them as soon as I am fully awake.

As for the shadowing figures, all I needed to do was calm them down and become comfortable with their animated and ‘wild’ energy (that initially scared me slightly). By remembering to send loving thoughts and energy as they spoke to me allowed me to show my understanding of the loving communication process that is difficult to control many times when faced with fear while OOB.

Getting fully out after meeting these individuals was also different in that despite my lack of usual quick determined movements, it was still an enjoyable experience, as the slowness allowed me to fully experience each part of the process. When finally outdoors, the expansiveness and happiness I felt ‘just doing nothing’ I believe was a much needed respite from the extremely stressful and overactive life that I have encountered these past few weeks.

Sunday, March 15, 2009

99) Physical Emotions In OBEs

3/13/09

There has been much turmoil in my life over the past few weeks and as usual, my ability to remember my travels OOB diminishes. I know I am still having my usual frequent exits, however, no matter how I try, the conscious recall of the event fades very quickly when fully awake.

What is interesting is that I can recall trying to remember details while being out with my usual technique of word associations, but every time, once fully awake and back in the ‘real world’, there is no memory left except knowing I was out.

This last experience I am sharing here mainly because I feel it was unusual in my ability to ‘physically’ feel not only texture, but also emotions! Up to this time, I have learned quite well to ‘control’ my emotional responses to anything I encountered, knowing that any extreme emotional response (other than love/happiness) will end my travels. This time, there were physical sensations and emotions that caused even more loss of control and lack of accomplishment within the experience.

There were multiple exits this night, but unfortunately there are few details except for the following. The first time I became aware of my readiness to separate, I easily rolled out, but found myself standing in darkness, barely able to move! I remember calling out for a friend (NJ), in an attempt to move. But for some reason I was immediately back in body, but quickly feeling the readiness to separate sensation.

I rolled out for the second time, and with my “to the door!” affirmation, I started moving but with extreme difficulty! I felt so heavy and so sluggish; I just wanted to get to the door as quickly as possible. I recall seeing my dog Buddy watching me, so I called for him to come with me. I felt concerned and upset for some reason.

It was still dark and I couldn’t see well, so I made a beeline for the front door feeling every texture change as I passed through the different pieces of furniture in my hurry to get outside. (I realize now that with my regular OBEs, I would normally take the usual ‘path’ around the furniture as I do in physical, but this time I was so intent on getting outside, I just moved straight to the door through the furniture!)

Again, I could sharply feel the texture change as I passed through the front door, and I remember standing in my front yard, now feeling the ‘tingle’ of raindrops falling! I recall I was surprised to discover that it was raining!

Suddenly, I found myself back in body, for the third time with the signal to separate. Again, I moved to the front door and outside, still very heavy and barely able to see. This time, I remember feeling the rain drops ‘tingle’ once again, and decided I would try to fly. Again no success with my usual quick take off, so this time I thought maybe I could at least ‘lift and drift’, moving slowly. Thankfully, I was pleased to discover I was lifting gently, but once again, I didn’t get far before finding myself back into body.

I also remember that a few times being out with these first experiences of the night, that I tried desperately to ‘see’ more clearly (as I did not remember to us my ‘Clarity now!’ affirmation.) Instead I remember trying to ‘physically’ open my eyes and I recall that it felt as though I WAS opening them for real! But with the realization that I was seeing ‘too much light’ AND feeling them physically opening, I quickly closed them and continued with the experience.

The last outing of the night began with another ‘false awakening’ that I was at least aware of enough to let it continue. I could hear my stepson and a few of his friends come into the living room directly to the couch where I was sleeping! One sat in the chair next to me, and the others were talking and milling around, paying no attention to me sleeping next to them!

I remember I tried to make a few movements and small noises to let them know I was there (as I am never sure when a false awakening occurs - but felt fairly sure this one was!) One friend even tried to pull the covers off of me, and remember having to grab them back to let them know I was there!

The group moves into the kitchen, and I am rather upset to think the friends were invited over without my knowledge. I realize by now this is definitely a false awakening, and I’m curious so I take this time to easily roll out of body to follow them!

I watched them for a time, while standing outside the kitchen, but then decided I wanted to make contact so I moved into the kitchen and around the lunch counter. I am now trying to make noise to get their attention, and I know I am talking but they are not hearing me!
I recall hearing my ‘voice’, having it sound like a dull “ wah,wah,wah”, and coming out unintelligible.

I realize I am not getting anywhere, I am feeling very frustrated, upset, and unable to think properly. Knowing these are emotions I have to control, I try to send ‘love’, but the best I can muster is ‘gratitude’. (I really don’t know what this means, but that’s what I recorded, so that’s what I’m writing!)

I move back to the dining room area, with the realization I was going to lose the experience, and now feeling quite physically ill and nauseous! Trying to prolong the OOB experience, I tried the little spin and affirmation “to my higher self!” but this spinning only made me more nauseous!!! I have never ever experienced such physical sensations while being OOB before!

I am not sure what is happening with me, so I decide to end the experience intentionally, something else I have never done before! I think directly of my physical body (which was easy since I was feeling such intense physical emotions!) and was able to return quickly.

I know this isn’t much of an experience to share, as I felt was not fully functioning and my emotions seemed to be out of control. However, there were some differences I ‘felt’ from my usual exits, so I thought I’d write this one.

I will share with everyone, however, what I did discover soon after that night’s experiences. That same time that I was OOB, my friend NJ was experiencing some intense emotional upset that I feel I may have somehow picked up on!

There is no way to firmly validate this connection, however, the time and sensations seem to ‘fit’ and since my intention that night was to visit with him, perhaps I shared this turmoil and became more ‘emotional’ and therefore less functioning.

Thursday, February 26, 2009

98) Controlling Fear, Sending Love

I moved to the couch about 3am with the intention of attempting to travel. My first recollection was not one of a direct OBE, but it seemed to relate to the general theme of the night’s events so I am writing that here as well.

I found myself in a local shopping mall parking lot at night, looking for a parking space. I notice many other cars there, all trying to squeeze into spots available. I park my car, and start walking toward the building when I notice that the lights are out and I can barely see!

I know I saw a curb and avoided that, trying to remain in the roadway. It became pitch black, and I became aware of others walking near me as I could hear them talking. I sensed a bit of fear, because I didn’t know who these people were and then became aware of ‘hearing’ my own thoughts!

I heard the words, ‘fear’ and ‘bad guy’ and felt like someone was coming after me! I was being forced to the ground, but amazingly I kept under control and just went with the flow, not fighting anything because somehow I ‘knew’ I could not be hurt! The entire experience faded with that thought…and I awoke.

Getting back to sleep with the intention of travel again, I now find myself in full vibrations, knowing I can separate. I roll out as usual, but this time it is the difficult separation in that I felt so heavy and out of control. I could barely move, and it was only with strong affirmations of “to the door!” that I moved to the dining room.

I stopped because I thought I heard someone say something, and asked, “Is anyone there?” I received no response and decided to just move outdoors as I didn’t feel ‘stable’ enough to maintain much of this experience. In hindsight, however, it may have been the man you will read about at the end of this experience.

Moving outdoors, I see the familiar trees in my yard and it gives me validation that I am out. (Despite my frequent OBE’s, I still feel reassured when I see things that validate my experience!) Without a specific destination planned, I use my preferred ‘to my higher self!’ affirmation to go wherever my spirit feels I will learn best.

I zoom up to the dark sky, seeing tiny dots of white lights in the blackness as I move forward. It changes to the sensation of the backward black tunnel – and it continues for quite a while! When it stops, though, I find myself once again back on the couch, feeling like I’m awake!

With hesitating, I just roll back off the couch and once again, find it is heavy and difficult to move. Affirming ‘to the door!’ I move to the front door and still find my movements difficult and not as clear as they can be.

I move to the front yard and still feeling heavy and ‘grounded’ as I lie on the soft grass. Looking up, I see my parent’s house next door, and decide I’d like to just go see what’s going on over there. However, no amount of affirmations or intentions made me move!

As I’m lying there, I’m wondering what’s happening? I look to my hands and see they are ‘glowing’, signaling and validating that I am indeed out of body, just hindered in my movements.

I spy a bit of paper lying near me and I start to pick up the long strip of paper, wondering “what is this for?” It appears to be EKG paper (familiar strips of long paper I use regularly at work in the hospital) and as I move to pick the continuous strip of paper up, I notice it is wrapped completely around my house, from end to end!!

My thoughts at that time were that somehow it was showing me that this experience would be ‘work-related’, but I am still not sure how it is. I also remember thinking, “I can’t let experience go too long as I need to record it”, but then decided I didn’t do too much, so I wouldn’t stop the experience yet!

As I realize there is just too much paper here to pick up, I let go of it…only to find myself immediately back in body on the couch! Thinking I’m awake, but not being sure, I am able to roll out and once again find myself standing in the living room.

This time it was an easy roll out, and I even remember thinking, ‘wow, third time’s the charm!’ As I begin to move away, I am aware of someone standing just behind me, off to my right.

I see the dark shape of a man, with a growling ‘zombie-like’ voice that says, “Give me more medicine now!” He grabs both my hands and holds them tight!

Somehow I am able to maintain control of my fear, even though I’m backing up to move away! I know I can’t be hurt, but it was an intense ‘sound’ to his voice, and the ‘physical’ grasp of his hands was very real!

He repeated “Give me more medicine now!” and I remember thinking I have to do something, but what? So I say, “Go to the Light!” (Not really knowing why I said this!) He continues to hold my hands and growl, so I reaffirm, “go to the Light!”

I have the ‘knowing’ that there is more I need to do, but I cannot think clearly enough to remember with this very real sensation of physical touch. So I add, “go to the Light NOW!” hoping that this would help, only to realize as he released my hands that I should have sent him Love!

I believe this experience was a learning one to show me that I still need some help in remembering that it is Love that conquers all fear! I am able to control the fear, and maintain the experience, however, I need to also remember that in order to help, and I have to send Love in return.

These experiences with fear, both my own created thoughts of fear (as in the parking lot) and actual fear with ‘close’ encounters were given to show me that in order to move ahead, I must learn to emanate Love to all I meet.