119) Fearful Hands - Preparing for Play

3/21/10

I became aware of a ‘buzzing’ sensation and was excited to know that I was going to get out! Taking the initiative, instead of rolling, I just climbed out! I can still remember now how easy it was!

The next I knew I felt hands grabbing my ankles and it wasn’t the same ‘loving hands’ that I have felt in the past. These were firm, ‘fearful’ hands that made me concerned at once. I moved as if to get away, but the hands followed, moving along different part of my legs, not letting go! I remember thinking I had to get them off – and tried to maintain calm so that I could ‘send love’. It was difficult to do, and I kept moving about to try to shake them off.

I remember ‘swatting’ at them, but to no avail – and even thinking to myself after doing this that it was a silly thing to do since I knew ‘nothing’ was there! There was one particular time I felt very concerned when the hands moved to a more ‘private part’ of my lower body, almost as if trying to ‘scare’ me, but I maintained control and kept moving, which kept the hands moving.

I knew I had to get outside, so affirmed ‘to the door!’ and found myself moving that direction but with much heaviness and difficulty. I keep pulling and tugging toward the door, knowing somehow that once outside I’d be free of these hands.

Finally outside, I was much relieved to feel the hands let go and quickly moved to ‘fly up’ to the tree tops. I remember seeing the branches, leaves…and being so thrilled at my freedom once again! Looking back at the door I just left, I thought I saw my husband there, and called for him to follow me knowing he probably wouldn’t as he does not fully believe in my travels. I hindsight, I am wondering if it wasn’t my husband trying to ‘hold’ me back out of his own fear?

I turned to continue on, and was so surprised to see my dog Buddy once again accompanying me! I remember doing my happy flying flips and swoops, just enjoying the freedom and ‘realness’ of the sensations! It’s been a long time since I was so fully ‘aware’ ….I was thrilled!

The scene changed and I found myself with a large group of people, all recognized as familiar friends and family gathered in a large open ‘auditorium’ type room. I knew we were preparing for another ‘play’ and I was so enjoying seeing everyone and being with them.

The ‘play’ was about to start, and I knew we were ALL to be a part of it! It was a fun, exciting feeling and I remember seeing the racks and racks of beautiful ‘gowns’ and clothing that we will have our choice of wearing for the ‘play’ as it unfolded.

While I’m there having such fun, I remember thinking that I should stop and wake to record what I’ve done so far, but the happiness and bliss I felt was so appealing that didn’t want it to end!

At one point, I hear someone come into the ‘auditorium’ to make an announcement just as the ‘show’ was about to start. Something about ‘unexpectedly unleashed 17,000 cases of TB’ (tuberculosis)…..and they will have to be ‘bio-chemically timed to come back sooner’.

Listening to this announcement, there was no concern or sadness anywhere. It all felt to be a ‘game’ of sorts, a ‘play’ that we all wanted to be a part of and knew we were just happy to have the chance to be there in our personally chosen ‘roles’. There was much laughter and fun, and even knowing this unexpected ‘event’ happened, it was more of a minor ‘scene change’ that we were thrilled to be a part of!

I woke soon after, losing my memories once again so quickly – but still ‘glowing’ in the happiness and joy I felt at being out and with my ‘old friends’!

New Links

Hi everyone! I had another OBE this morning, the first in a long time again! It felt SO good to be out! I wasn't much, but it had some 'negativity' in it so I will write it up shortly.

Meanwhile, I want to let everyone know that if you haven't read my 'favorites' listed at the top of this blog, now there is no reason not to!! :) Thanks to Yvonne who posted a comment regarding this idea, I was able to add direct links to the numbers!! Easy to find blog posts now!

Enjoy! Keep me posted as to how else I can improve this for you!

Thanks for giving me a reason to share,
Karen

118) Nothing is Impossible!

2/28/10

I want to share with you an OOB experience that at the time, I didn’t realize was even an out-of-body experience!!

I had attempted to travel, moving to my ‘traveling couch’ after a few hours sleep as usual. I was disappointed to wake a few times, realizing I had had a variety of ‘events’ but nothing that I could put together in a cohesive story.

I try to sleep once again, and my first ‘recall’ of this experience was actually ‘waking’ and remembering, as I walked up the stairs to return to my bed that I was once again disappointed in not having had gone OOB! As I walk up the stairs, I have the feeling that maybe somehow, despite my absolute certainty that I am awake, there COULD be a possibility all is not as it seems and I am really OOB! (What even gave me that idea was amazing, because I truly thought I was fully awake!) To show myself that I AM AWAKE, I lean my shoulders against the walls and head ‘bumps’ the angular ceiling...I was thinking, oh dear, I just CAN'T be OOB because I am awake and feeling these walls/ceilings.

What is truly amazing to me is that for some reason, I can’t tell you why because I don’t know! I made the decision that it's really MY BELIEF that I am NOT OOB that is keeping me feeling 'awake', and that perhaps I really was!!! (I am thinking, in hindsight, that my thoughts over the past few weeks have been to try to understand how ALL things are possible as the sages say, and feeling it’s the tight hold we give to our ingrained beliefs and ‘physical-ness’ that keeps us from achieving that which we want)

So, by this time I'm at the top of the stairs, and immediately decide that despite my 'wakeful' knowingness - I was going to walk into the wall to give myself that ‘chance’ to see what my ‘physical status’ was, and to show that I am awake or OOB!!! It was an unusual decision, as I was so certain I was awake - but I was aghast to find that I moved INTO the wall!! I remember it was difficult to pass into, but I DID!!

At this point I woke (I think because I was stunned to realize I WAS OOB!), realizing in fact that I was NOT upstairs, that I don't have narrow walls such as I felt 'touching' me on the way up, and that I was still on the couch!!!! It was just an amazing realization I had upon waking, that I was SO SO convinced I was NOT OOB, that I was physical in every sense of the word, yet I wasn't!!

What I took from this was two things. That I firmly believe it is our beliefs and ‘closed’ mind physical upbringing to what we are told is ‘impossible’ that keeps us from attaining what may actually be possible!! We need to consider the impossible as a possibility before we will be able to achieve any strides toward our goal.

Additionally, I also feel that this is ‘firmness of belief’ is what others who have crossed, yet don't know it, must feel as they live in their self-made astral worlds. They are convinced they are 'normal' in physical bodies in every way, and it is not until they change their 'belief' and open to the smallest possibility of there being other options that give them the chance to change their perspective on how things are. Hence the reason why the retrievals we do in our travels work to bring into their lives that ‘chance’ of change and possibility!

117) Tumors; Joel (Joeb?) & his Tractor

I am so happy to be able to write another adventure to share with everyone! It has been a long time without any cohesive memories that I could write and share so I’m pleased to say that I believe I had another OBE retrieval early this morning!

The night started much as usual, but I went to my ‘traveling couch’ earlier than usual (2am) due to being awake and unable to sleep right away. I initially had many different ‘dream clips’ and each time waking and wondering what they could mean. There were some related to my work, a few felt as if I was really OOB and in one I can remember different children running around my house making noise.

Another one in particular was rather intriguing in that I had just finished ‘helping’ this disabled child, and he told me I had ‘tumors in my belly’. At that time I recall having felt ‘lumps’ in my lower abdomen, and asked the child where they were. He pointed to his lower abdomen, and said ‘it’s not big deal, they just need to come out’. Immediately my medical background kicks in and I’m trying to seal in my memory that I may need a test to look for these in the future.

One other ‘dream’ was different in that I met with a man and woman who were telling me of their ‘loss’ of a young son, Joel (Joeb? Two part Jo- name). They told me he died at a young age “many, many years ago” after falling off a wagon being pulled by a tractor. He loved tractors, and I had a sense of ‘farming’ when talking to this couple.

I made no sense of this until I had this OBE a short time later. I remember ‘waking’ on the couch, and feeling disappointed that I once again was awake without having had an OOBE. I rolled off the couch, and found myself completely tangled in the blankets sitting on the floor! Trying to get untangled, I looked toward the TV in my living room and noticed light shadows, as if someone was blocking the light coming in from the front door down the hallway. (Had I realized it, this living room was the way it appeared a few years ago before we had it remodeled. That should have been a signal for me too!)

Thinking the front door was accidently left open (and not realizing there shouldn’t be light outside yet!), I moved down the hallway and was shocked to see my young son about age 5 coming in from outdoors!! I realized immediately that I had to be OOB, as my son is a young man of 25 right now, yet here he was as a child!

I was thrilled to think I was finally OOB again, and my young son escorted me outdoors to the front porch. I began floating upward slightly and everything went black for a few seconds, but then I floated back down to the front porch and my vision returned. This floating just confirmed to me that I was indeed OOB.

Here, the scenery changed as my usual front yard was now covered with a brick/stone walkway that weaved in and out of masses of wildflowers – yellow, orange, white ones – and I took note that the flowers were beautiful, yet the ‘feel’ of the flowers was ‘unkempt’ or ‘wild’, as if not looked after.

There were children playing and running around, also with the ‘unkempt’ or ‘wild’ feel, as if not cared for. They were happy, but in a ‘wild’ sort of way. It’s hard to describe, but almost as if they were ‘not good’ children, or bullies. I saw adults there too, one mentally challenged man was off to my left, quiet and non-communicative, and there were two female ‘caretakers’ off to my right who were happy to see me.

We walked together and talked, but memories elude me as to what the discussion was about once I woke fully at the end. I remember the landscape simulated the land around my house and at one point, I felt drawn to a young child standing quietly and forlornly by the side of the road, as if he was sad and withdrawn.

The feeling was that this child was being ‘bullied’ by the other children and did not even try to reach out to anyone. In hindsight, I’m think he was not able to ‘see’ the adults who were there with me trying to help him, hence his forlorn appearance and resignation to a life of being teased and bullied by the other children.

He saw me and allowed me to pick him up, giving him hugs and talking with him. He remained non-communicative, and the adults with me told me his name was ‘Joel’ (Joab?!) the same name I heard just a dream or two ago!! I immediately recognized that name, and asked what his story was.

The adults told me he had ‘passed over’ quickly as a young child after falling off a wagon! I knew immediately that this was the same ‘lost’ child the parents were looking for!

Walking back toward my house, I found myself inside a room with two other adults (they appeared to be MY parents, but I think the connection was that these were caretakers of the children). They told Joel that they were ‘going out’ that I was to ‘babysit’ for a bit, and to listen to what I said. I had the feeling Joel had memories of what babysitters did, and this is how they got him to pay attention to me.

I immediately went into ‘babysitter’ mode – which is always trying to find something that I know the child would relate to and have fun with. In searching the room, I found shelves with small toy objects, and my eyes were thrilled to see that way up high on a shelf was a small wagon!! I took it down and showed Joel, who lit up with a smile.

I then searched more and found a tractor wheel on a chicken? object so I took it down. I attached it to the wagon, and Joel was now beaming! Somehow, the object changed into a toy tractor that Joel was able to sit into and drive. I pushed other toy objects out of the way so he could ‘drive’ and it appeared he was now completely enthralled with the idea he was in control. At that point the OBE ended!!!

I can only imagine that he was now able to ‘see’ those who were there to help him, or perhaps even help himself by feeling more ‘in control’ so that he could go back with his parents who were looking for him.

Recording this OBE was difficult, as I remember thinking I was recording it two or three times, only to realize that I still was not fully awake and using the ‘real’ recorder! I went over the experience many times, trying to ‘seal it’ in my memory, only to realize I wasn’t awake and recording! When I did ‘pull myself’ up to full wakefulness, the memories faded SO quickly! I just feel so disappointed that it all seemed so easy to remember, until I became fully conscious!

116) Grounding the Energy

It has been a very emotional and stressful few months here for me, with many ongoing family issues, personal issues, and work/school related issues. Suffice to say, I have been so focused on taking care of others, that I neglected ME!

A few months ago I noticed I was having a ‘buzzing’ in my right ear intermittently, almost a ‘blowing’ sound that, although quite annoying , did not distress me too much. As the weeks passed, it became louder and more frequent.

Then late last August I had a distressful experience where the ‘blowing’ sound became intensely loud, and I was suddenly overcome with vertigo and dizziness – along with nausea – that I couldn’t even stand. Everything was spinning out of control, and I was totally incapacitated!

This episode luckily happened while at work in a medical center and I was treated immediately, which consisted of rest and anti-vertigo medication. There was nothing visually out of order in my ear.

I was happy because the ‘blowing’ noise abated, but it was short-lived. A few days later it returned, and after another few days, another vertigo/dizzy episode occurred. Long story short, after seeing a doctor and tests, I was diagnosed with Meniere’s syndrome and told there wasn’t much to do except ‘live with it’ and make some lifestyle dietary changes (low salt, diuretics, etc) to keep it from happening too frequently.

Despite my best efforts, the episodes continued on an infrequent basis, and I saw another doctor for a second opinion. He also confirmed the same diagnosis and treatment. This did not sit well with me. I just ‘felt’ this was not right and I needed to do more research to see what it could be.

In speaking with a friend who is well versed in energy through years of Qigong teaching, I was intrigued by his questioning as to whether the vertigo episodes happened while busy throughout the day, or more when quietly sitting/resting. For me, it would always be while I was quiet, and sometimes even waking me at 3am while sleeping! (My usual OOBE time!)

He explained that this vertigo while ‘quiet’ is commonly due to insufficient ‘grounding’ of energy, and living too much ‘in the mind’, as I have been with the OOBEs, graduate school work, and meditative practices. He gave me grounding exercises to try, such as visualizations of ‘roots’ growing down from my balanced feet and my extended arms with hands facing down. Immediately I could feel the ‘tingling’ of my palms as the energy passed through, and would do this a few times during the day or night whenever I felt even the slightest vertigo.

Over the course of only one week, my ‘blowing’ noise in my ear abated, and the vertigo stopped! The tingling in my palms actually became less as more energy became grounded.

I was concerned that this ‘grounding’ may inhibit my OOBEs, which is quite possible as I have not had one that is even close to what I used to do for over a month! I was concerned, but also knew that I never wanted to experience those dizzy spells again!!

I have since learned to ‘balance’ my life a bit better now, giving some time to physical outlets for this grounding energy, as well as lighten my ‘mental’ activities by not aggressively pursuing OOBEs for a short while. I know when I am ready, they shall return. (Hopefully soon!) I finish grad school in May and my ‘mental’ work with that will be significantly less as well.

I asked my friend to give a little background as to what happened to me, and to share any insight he has on this unbalanced energy phenomena. I am sure there are many people out there who are experiencing physical manifestations of disease and illness that could be ‘cured’ by seeking a better ‘balance’ within their lives. Here’s what he said:


Sometimes we need to look at the body holistically, not just treating ear symptoms by treating the ear, but by picturing the entire body as a balanced system which has gone out of kilter. This is much the view taken in Chinese medicine, where western medicine focuses heavily upon localizing a particular organ and feeding it a fix, I believe! Neither system is always right, or wrong IMO; these are both extreme viewpoints. The answer is often to be found in the region between these extremes.

Question: How did you learn that dizziness when 'quiet' usually meant energy disturbance, and dizziness when 'busy' is inner ear imbalance?

Because this was my own post Kundalinin experience....and, it makes sense....when BUSY, we usually `ground' our focus in physicality. For example, if we are practicing tap dancing, we focus strongly on our feet; the attention is on "MY feet", the word MY implying attention IN the body.....and, remember, where the attention goes, the chi flows, so tap dancing will really sink the chi.

It is through learning the ability to consciously direct the chi in this way, that we allow many hours of intellectual/spiritual/OBE/especially Hemisynch/meditative type pursuits to be balanced with good physical presence. Without the grounding, poor health will eventually result, and also an inability to utilize learned spiritual knowledge in everyday physical life.

If we are sitting quietly, our attention is probably more of the form "I think...", "I feel.." - here the attention is on `I'.......in the MIND, NOT in the body. Hence, the energy rises to the head.

It is SIMPLY a matter of living a balanced life, i.e. balancing mental/spiritual activities with `body based' physical activities, like exercise.

(1) A person who spends nearly all of their time thinking and very little of their time `doing' is neglecting their body, to its detriment. Their energy distribution will be such that most of their energy is in their head.

(2) Similarly, a person who spends nearly all of their time `doing' and very little of their time thinking, is neglecting their mind, to its detriment. Their energy distribution will be such that most of their energy is in their body.

We are a mind and a body - it's a duality, like everything in life. Both need to work in harmony. Any deviation from this state eventually results in problems.

For a comfortable existence, we need to avoid extremes and inhabit the area in between.

If we become unbalanced, we need to take corrective action. If the problem is case (1) above, we can remedy it by increasing our body based activity, or by using `energetic' methods of grounding, to redistribute some of the energy down into the body.

For case (2), poor health will seldom result, just mental/spiritual/emotional depravity! This is addressed by increasing `thinking' and `feeling' activity.

Both (1) and (2) are admirably served by practicing authentic qigong, yoga or a physical exercise program!

Question: Are there any other 'signs' of energy imbalance that may be confused with erroneous physical complaints?

There are! Imbalances of energy.....this `energy' appears to be closely linked with the endocrine system, so it actually affects body chemistry, if one wishes to think purely in physical terms. For example, bottled up emotions can cause physical symptoms.

For example, prolonged depression will adversely affect lung/large intestine energy. This may result in, say, breathing problems, which a person would typically attempt to rectify with prescription drugs which `open out the alveoli'. Whilst this provides temporary relief, the underlying problem is still accumulating.

In turn, the drugs used may then cause other problems, perhaps affecting liver function, because of the extra burden of detoxification! Frustration and anger at lack of a `cure' may then occur. In turn, unexpressed anger will also adversely affect liver function. Sometimes the only cure is to look within.

Importance of grounding....More to come!

Hi everyone! I feel like it's been forever since I have had a good OBE where I can share my experiences here. I have had such an 'awakening' lately, that without the help of a good friend who is knowledgeable of such energy matters, I am sure I would not be as good as I am now.

I believe my OBEs have been 'limited' lately due to physical issues that were caused by too much 'mental work' and not enough grounding. At this time, I am feeling great but still having some time constraints due to busy work and finishing my grad school soon.

I am going to be sharing what's been happening to me here as soon as I can because I feel it is important that others know how this energy imbalance can manifest as physical symptoms.

Keep an eye on my blog...I shall post it soon!

115) Meeting others; Trust the Universe

1/03/10
For this OBE, I had gone to bed and awakened after a few hours with the intention of attempting to get OOB. I used intention and affirmation requesting to ‘help someone’. The experience started primarily as a ‘dreamstate’ awareness but then moved into a conscious awareness but this time without the memory of an actual ‘physical’ exit.

I was looking for a notebook/album that I needed to have to do my work. Someone was helping me look for it (female). We were initially in a ‘library’ type room looking through the books with others who were already working at the tables because they had their notebook.

The scene moved into another familiar setting, my Grandmother’s house, that is still in physical but no longer looks the same as it did here. It may have been because I was thinking of her a lot over the past week and had just discussed her again the previous night with my father (she was his mother). She passed over many years ago and I have many fond memories of her and her home.

In her house, we found a ‘secret’ passage that was sealed up that no one knew about, and were excited to get it open to uncover what was behind it. It opened easily, as it seems to be made of only paper for the covering. As we looked into the hidden area, I could see it morph in to a large room and as I entered, was surprised to see a ‘chairlift’ type seat come up behind me and swoop us up! I noticed my mother was there at this time as well, having been swooped up into a separate chair and then moved up the incline, separating her from the track we were on.

Once I was up the hill toward whatever I heading for, I became very ‘heavy’ and sluggish, and the chair I was in stopped then started sliding back down the hill! It took with it a few other people who were following behind us and I was SO apologetic to think I caused such a commotion!

I asked for help in getting to where I needed to go, and instantly found myself within a darkened room. There was no longer a ‘dream’ feeling to this setting, as I knew I was conscious and fully aware OOB.

There was light coming in from the left side, and I was positioned in one corner looking out. I sensed a presence in the dark room with me, and become just slightly fearful. I clasped my hands as if in prayer, which reminded me that I am in control and fear only gives the control away.

I mentally shout out, “Who is there?” and am surprised to hear a voice speaking to me! Now, this is where I have lost many memories, as what exactly occurred as there was a succession of ‘people’ who came into the room to speak to me! I remember speaking clearly and compassionately to those who came, and each time one would ‘dissolve’ away I could sense another one coming in! Each time I asked, “who is here now?” and I would always get a response.

A few bits of the conversations I DO remember include one woman who spoke initially, with a sense of sadness and fear having left behind a husband and child. She did not understand what was happening to her, and I can only remember telling her to ‘look for the light’ and ‘go to the light’. One other time when I asked, “who is here?” I remember getting the answer, “no one! Not me!” and then told them, “well, I certainly hear your voice, so someone is here!” chiding them to speak to me, which they did.

There was about five or six different people I spoke to in that room, knowing full well as I spoke that I was not going to remember many specifics of our conversations because there was so much we talked about!

As the last one left, I became aware of a male voice speaking from my left. In the light that was entering the room from that side, I was finally able to see a young 30 something male with blond hair speaking to me. He had pretty gray eyes and all three were very good looking. They were all very visible, and speaking about a personal message that I needed to hear - one that I just can’t share with everyone at this time.

The basic idea of the message was that ANYthing is possible and you need to trust the Universe to provide, even that which you may feel is not within your capabilities. I awoke with excitement, knowing there are never IMpossibilities! The idea is to hang onto the END result, and trust the Universe to decide how and when!!!

114) Watching my Exit; Images from Memories; Control of Mind

For this OBE, I had gone to sleep with the intention of wanting to help someone if I could. To give a little background, the day before this OBE happened, I received an email from a new beginner OBE’r asking for help in getting OOB. I now believe this OBE may have been my way of ‘helping someone’ here in physical!

I move to the couch, after sleeping for 4 hours, to try for the OBE. As I drift off, I become aware of a ‘getting ready’ signal of soft vibrations. I knew I could ‘will’ them to be stronger and played with the sensations by increasing them. After about four cycles of increased vibrations, they become stronger and stay strong. It’s interesting to know that while I’m doing this, I am also aware that I’m thinking about what they are, and saying to myself, “these vibrations are the ‘interface’ between the different energy levels of the ‘mind-body’ connection.”

Now I feel my hands floating up and know that I’m ready to separate. Instead of just rolling out as usual, I did an unfamiliar slow ‘climb out’ technique! It was so different than my usual quick separation! It literally felt as though I was doing a slow ‘crawl’ out of my body with such clearness of thought! I’m thinking (while I’m climbing out) that this is so different, that maybe this means I am to ‘watch’ my exit this time because I need to really take note of how I did it so that I could share it with the one who sent the email asking me about it! It’s amazing how ‘clear thinking’ you can still be even when you know you are not ‘in body’!

I then stand at the side of the couch and immediately start moving away, knowing I needed to move away from my body before I get pulled back. I gently glide out the side door, flying very easily, sensing where I am but not seeing clearly. Once on the porch outside, I knew I could go anywhere I’d like, so I fly straight up into the sky, feeling very, very aware and very much in full control of my thoughts and actions.

What is interesting now, is that while I’m flying, I realize that I’m also very aware of being on the couch! This was new, this ‘lightness’ of awareness. It’s tough to describe how I felt, but I can remember thinking that it felt as though my thoughts were being spoken by my physical body as well! I thought that I could hear my ‘voice’ with my affirmations, that my physical mouth was moving! I remember saying to myself that if someone was sitting next to me on the couch, that I believe I could actually ‘talk’ out loud WHILE OOB and share what I was doing! I immediately thought of Edgar Cayce and his trance states, and how this had to be similar. (Now, all these thoughts WERE while I was OOB flying – amazing!)

So I’m talking ‘out loud’ (as far as I know – my consciousness was primarily in the astral body so memories are more prevalent there), saying “to my higher self!” as I zoom along, and my intention of “allow me to help someone”. I was SO aware of my actions, and as I spoke, I felt that immediate transition to the long pull backwards into the black tunnel that is so common for me.

This time, however, I am paying such close attention to how it feels, and what the actual movement feels like instead of wondering where I’ll end up! It’s all so clear and I’m happy to know I’ll be able to tell others how it feels!

As the pullback ends, I’m aware it sounds so similar to the ‘clicking’ of train tracks, as if pulling into a station. I’m still not seeing anything, and at this point I usually see or move into another situation, however this time I just remained where I was in the blackness! I didn’t know what to do!

Without time to think, I hear a female voice fade in, one that ‘echoed’ slightly, saying words I couldn’t pick up at first. There were three words I recall, the first two are phonetic as I am not certain, but the last one I am certain. It was “Mind (mine?)…needs (?)…too.” I am confused wondering if it was related to someone I was to help, or if it was a message for me. At this point, I fade to full wakefulness on the couch and record what I can remember.

Now for whatever reason, I wake enough to check my email to see what’s there and see that the new OBE’r did write back with a question about ‘seeing’ and physical vision during an OBE. I realized then that I need to tell others that this ability to get OOB is not about ‘seeing’ but all about ‘feeling’ your way! You just ‘sense’ what you are doing, and may have been why I had NO vision at all but extreme clarity of thought this time!

I lie back and attempt to re-induce and find myself watching images as they appear behind my closed eyes. I recall familiar black-and-white designs that remind me of a shirt I had worn recently, and then the image change into various scenes, a farmyard, a mountain with clouds, a peaceful field but each time the black and white image would appear between them. I am fully aware of being on the couch, while watching these images.

Now I begin to hear noises, fuzzy at first, but then more like a talk-radio station tuning in. I hear what I believe are radio announcers (I hear them say their call letters and just bantering talk), there is non-specific white noise as well, and at one point I know I hear what a flight attendant would say to her passengers, and I recorded the words “welcome to your flight to Hong Kong, please enjoy the flight movie” and something about ‘catching you if you fall’!!!! It was almost as if I was ‘tuning in’ to the multitude of radio waves encircling the globe!

So I’m listening to the noise, watching the images, and then become aware that my hand and feet are floating! It’s my signal to roll out, so I do. But again, this time, it was SO very different! I could SEE and I could see VERY clearly!

Standing by the couch, I could see everything as clear as if I was physically standing in broad daylight! I am looking at my feet lying on the couch, amazed at the clarity. I moved past the couch, always wanting to get away from the body, but this time I stopped and looked back at myself sleeping on the couch on my left side! I have rarely been able to see myself while OOB, and never with such clarity! I’m thinking, ‘Wow! This is such a different feeling to this exit!’ - unlike any other time – and I wondered if other OBEr’s were able to feel and see like this!

Moving into the living room, I realize I am seeing ‘images from memories’ all around the room. Anything I looked at was a memory, but here it existed as a ‘real’ thing. There were many, many Christmas type ‘images/memories’, a few with my sons as little boys playing with toys, and one with my daughter as a teenager. I was able to interact with the ‘image/memory’ of my daughter and gave her a hug, knowing that was what she needed and to let her know I was there for her. In another part of the room I remember seeing a lamp/decoration from years ago that brought back more memories, and I recall thinking, “I remember that!”

At this point, the living changes into the living room of my childhood at my parent’s house. Once I realize where I was, I eagerly ran up the stairs shouting for my mother (who is still alive). I felt ‘physical’ in movement up the stairs, and at the top where my old bedroom was, I stuck my head inside to see that the room was just as I remember it, not as it is now.

I hear my mom answering me, and pull back, floating a little, which made me realize I was still OOB and did not have to move so ‘physically’! So I float through a wall searching for my mother and find myself in darkness. My mother finds me and we begin to talk. During our conversation, I realize she is not talking like she hears me anymore, and I tell her ‘I have to go’. It was here that I faded back to full awareness on the couch.

I record this, thanking those who gave it to me for such a wonderful experience. I am just in awe of how clear and aware I was throughout the entire time.

One final memory I have of this night happened right before waking. For more background, it’s been a rather tumultuous few weeks here for me with a lot of ‘family issues’ going on that give me concern and turmoil at times.

I remember ‘dreaming’ of many different emotional situations with various people in my life, some very upsetting and frustrating. The last few details of this ‘dream sequence’ were more lucid and clear, so I recorded it as transcribed. I was in a hallway, following behind this short dark haired older woman and recognized her as a famous psychic whom everyone knew.

I decided I was not going to disturb her with a greeting, as she probably had enough from others. However, she abruptly stopped in front of me, did a ‘pretend’ bump into me to get my attention, grabbed my arms on both sides and looked at me squarely in the eyes, saying, “If you are going to do this, you need to learn control!” I was a bit taken aback by it all, and woke immediately afterward.

I recorded what she said, not realizing that it may relate to the ‘mind-needs-too’ message that I received in the first part of the night. Perhaps I need to realize that my desire to be all I can be to everyone is taking a toll on my emotional state and I need to find time for myself and be more ‘in control’ of my emotions and the way I am looking at events in my life.

I have to remember that how you perceive this physical life is largely based on how you ‘react’ to the many situations you find yourself in, and if you can control how you react, you can gain a better understanding of what you are to learn from these experiences.

113) Bits and Pieces of OOBEs- Astral vision, Visiting Civilizations

It’s been a while since I’ve had any really good OOBEs to post here as I don’t want to put up uninteresting posts that the readers may find boring. However, with the hectic life I have right now, and for the next six months, I will post those pieces of OOBE’s that I feel are more readable. I know I am still having the learning OOB experiences, but my recall is so limited anymore, possibly due to so many other ‘physical’ concerns to think about in my daily life!

Here’s the latest over the past few weeks:

10/22/09 Astral Vision

I found myself fully aware of lying on my bed, but with my ‘astral vision’ opening. I’m in a car, in the seat behind the front passenger side, looking out the side window of the car. I can see moving scenery, and I notice a huge black electronic sign (turned off) that gets my attention. The clarity is amazing, and I remember thinking how unusual this is to see so clearly while knowing I’m in bed! I turn to look back (to prove to myself that I still can see it!) and watch as the sign fades in the distance.

Now, along the side of the road as the car moves, I see animals lined up along the side of the road. Soon, these animals become ‘distorted’ or misshapen, as I notice that there are parts of different animals on one! For instance, there was what appeared to be an elephant, but with a goat’s head!

Seeing this, and knowing I’m still in bed, I am now aware that I could transition to full OOB if I wanted to. (The anomaly signaled my awareness as it used to do!) But, this time, because everything is just so clear, I just don’t want to try to move out yet!

Looking out the front window of the car, I see the two front seats are empty and yet the car is moving forward. I have no fear at all, as I have become aware of my pre-OOB status and want to have some fun trying to see what I can do.

Again, I feel I have to prove to myself that I am OOB (or at least pre-OOB), I grab a hold of the front passenger headrest and pull myself into a handstand!! I can feel the sensation of ‘blood-rushing’ to my head (physical memory, I’m sure) and with that it caused a lighter state of transition, almost as if waking slightly.

The vision darkened, and I’m still aware of being in the bed, now with the circling of my hand chakras (something that I haven’t had in quite a while). I willed them to be stronger in hopes of returning to the astral vision or OOB mindstate, but was unsuccessful.

Even though this wasn’t really a full OOB experience, it was one of the few times I had the ‘bi-location’ feeling of being in two places at once and with such clarity of vision, I just didn’t want to move out right away.

11/01 Visiting Civilizations

This OOBE was so long in length and detail that there is only a few aspects that I was able to recall. Even while being OOB, I remember I told myself that if I didn’t force myself to awaken soon, that I would not be able to recall much. With that, I decided that I would pursue the experience, for which I’m sure I had some great learning. It just frustrates me that I cannot bring much detail back to share with everyone!

What I do remember is that it took me many attempts to get out of the house once OOB. I could be so heavy, crawling and affirming ‘to the door!’ in order to move. Once I remembered to do a little jump and spin, while affirming ‘inward now!’ and that moved me into my long, long black tunnel pullback sensation.

I remember that I visited many different civilizations of people, interacting and talking with them. I have no specific memories except for the one cave I entered that was dimly lit by yellow light. In this cave was intricately carved ‘things’ sticking out all along the sides of the passageway, narrowing it to the point where movement was difficult. They felt/looked ‘sharp’, perhaps having been carved from bone or horns. I was able to get deep inside the cave and felt the people who did these carving were very small in stature, but it narrowed so much that I felt uncomfortable and decided to leave before seeing anyone.

The only other ‘civilization’ I recall was looking down at these stone walls that formed separate rooms, appearing to me from above as if it were a maze. I gathered with some people who were with a man who was injured, but do not remember anything more. There were events happening that I didn’t even question, just observed and learned.

At some point in this long experience, I remember asking to see my guide, and knowing he was with me, talking with him. I asked him why I wasn’t able to see him, he answered, but I do not now know what he said!

There was so much more to this than I can recall, and it really frustrates me to post something so general. However, I know that the experiences will return when my life settles a bit more so I have to be patient and just share what little I have.

11/10 Reunion

This OBE I had wanted to ‘help someone’ as my intention, in the hopes that there would be something I could share with others. As it ends up, I was the one given help, in knowing that my guides are still with me and want me to be happy.

I again had a difficult exit, but with help from others, was able to roll out. I found myself immediately in an underground area, with a subway type feeling. People were all around me and a particular Hispanic man walked up to me and began talking. I felt a bit uncomfortable with his energy, and was not sure why.

Remembering that I had wanted to ‘help someone’ for this OOBE, I tried to help him by sending love, a technique that worked well in the past. However, this time, he wasn’t leaving. He followed me into another room and I realized I needed help. I asked for my guides to come and I was immediately surrounded by 3-4 other people, with one woman in charge.

They ‘spoke’ to him in his own language, telling him to sit in a chair nearby and wait. It sounded as if it could be Spanish (as I have a limited knowledge of that language) but he was resistant to their instructions at first. However, he moved to a chair in another room and I was able to move away with them into another room.

This room felt as though it was a restaurant of sorts, with a bar and tables set up. The group of guides told me they wanted to show me something in the back. As we entered the back room there was a table elegantly set with beautiful dishes and filled with food.

At one place, a guide asks me to place my hand over the ‘medallions’ to see if I can ‘feel’ their vibrations/energy (this wasn’t the word, but it’s the best description I can give). As I raise my hand over them, I feel the ‘tingling’ and get excited, thinking, “I can! I can!”

At this point they all burst out laughing, and say, “Surprise! It’s all for you”, and I suddenly see familiar faces of friends I haven’t seen in many years! It was a ‘reunion’ of sorts, and there was much laughing and happiness as we shared the food. I recall the one friend who showed me a HUGE strawberry, and offered me a taste. I could again ‘taste’ that strawberry, causing me to salivate (for real!)

As in my past OBE, this salivation brought my awareness up to the point where I realized I had to get recording this in order to remember even parts of it. I find my recorder, but again, see that it is in pieces! However, as I’m trying to get it fixed, pushing buttons and knobs, it is playing! (I should have realized this was a false awakening, but I was intent on getting it fixed!)

Giving up, I decided to look for pen and paper to write it down, and with that I transitioned to a lighter state where I realized it was not happening. I woke, found my recorder intact, and recorded what I remembered. Again, due to that delay with a false awakening, more memories were lost! SO frustrating!

112) Physical Senses While OOB

October 8, 2009

This OBE again started with a false awakening, one where I heard what I thought was my son come in the front door talking with a friend as I lay on the couch. As it was the middle of the night, I knew to just ‘lie in wait’ for what would happen next.

I saw two small children, boy and girl of about 6 years, come from the hallway to stand next to the couch where I was lying. “Can you take care of something for us?” was the question I ‘heard’ and immediately rolled out and followed them down the hall to the real life room that I ‘felt’ belonged to my sons. (The room is currently in use by my stepson, as my own boys have since grown and moved out).

Peering into the doorway, I saw three little boys of about 3-4 years old playing around in their beds. They were fully dressed and hiding/playing under their covers, as if not having taken the time to undress and get ready for bed. I asked, “Where are your pajamas?”, and then sternly told them to get out from under the covers and put them on now. This ‘taking control’ of the silliness and telling them to behave was, I ‘felt’, the main reason why the other two older children came to get me off the couch.

Finding myself back on the couch, I realized I could still just ‘roll out’ so I did! Being fully aware, I just took the fastest way outside, through the wall near the couch. I could feel the coolness of the night air as I passed through, and found myself floating gently in my back yard.

I was amazed to next find myself so close to the ground that I could ‘feel’ the leaves from the trees that had fallen already. I remember I even tried to ‘bunch’ them up, resulting in some leaves being pushed into my mouth and giving me a choking sensation!! I remember thinking, “Why am I able to feel these so intensely?” It was surprising as I knew without a doubt I was out of body, yet marveled at the intense physical touch sensation of these leaves!

Clearing the leaves, I floated over to the nearby road, only to discover it was now a ditch full of water! Just next to the ditch, was a walled up body of water, like a very large puddle. Remembering the fun I had with puddles as a child making rivers and dams in the rain, I wondered if I’d be able to release this huge puddle into the ditch.

Pushing against the dirt wall, I was thrilled to see the wall release and the contents drain quickly into the ditch! It was just an awesome feeling, and I remarked to the woman who was with me how much fun it was!

Walking along the edge of the ditch, I’m being careful not to ‘fall in’ because it all feels so ‘physical’…but then, quickly I recall, “what am I so worried about? I’m out of body!” and with a smile and big leap, took a chance and jumped into the water!

I floated to the bottom, and then playfully decided I’d roll over on my back while under the water, and look up to wave and smile at those I left on the banks! I was being silly, having fun, and they smiled and waved in return at my joy. (Funny how even now I can ‘picture’ exactly what it looks like to ‘look up’ from the bottom of that ditch!)

As I moved out of the ditch I could ‘hear’ conversations, and listened intently to a conversation with a group of 4-5 others (at the time I knew who they were, but have no recall now except for ‘past friends’). One of them was a supervisor who had just returned from Ohio (?) and was remarking on how bad the hospital situation was there. All of them were talking, and those who had worked there before agreed with the supervisor that it was bad.

Leaving the group, I moved to a large building, one with a ‘reception hall’ or convention arena feeling. It was all set up for an event. I was so thrilled to be out of body, knowing it without a doubt, and being able to physically ‘touch’ and move wherever I wanted! I moved high and low, looking and touching, and specifically remember floating up near the ceiling next to some heavy drapery that was decorating the hall.

I could ‘feel’ the texture of the drapery as it hung, and knew that in ‘real life’ I’d never be able to do this! I even recall telling a gentleman there, ‘Isn’t this great? You can do whatever you want, go through things, go high and low, know you are out of body, and still have all your physical senses!” He just smiled without saying a word.

I was SO in control of what I was thinking and doing! While high near the ceiling, I then looked down through some narrow slots and could SMELL the wafting aroma of food cooking! Amazed at the sense of smell, I dived down through the very narrow slots, never thinking twice about whether I could or not because I was SO certain of my OOB status.

I remember ‘bouncing’ a bit as I neared the floor, maybe because I didn’t want to pass through the floor and had to put the brakes on! I could see a kitchen area, with pretty clear pink colored dishes on display. There were plates, serving bowls, cups – all a beautiful clear glass-type pink color.

Following the aroma, I moved to a display of fruit in a bowl, but the bowl itself was created by freezing fruit within ice. I thought what a wonderful way to keep the fruit cold – a bowl made by freezing water and decorated with pieces of fruit within it! (I actually thought it was such a good idea that I’d have to remember to use it in my daughter’s upcoming wedding!)

Next to this fruit ice bowl was food cooking, and the aroma was exquisite! Now, I will write what I saw, but it makes no sense now. Of course, at the time, it made perfect sense! A man was showing us how to cook the frozen fruit on a hot steak, so that the fruit would melt as the steak cooked!?! I distinctly remember a slice of pineapple on that steak along with other fruit pieces. The smell was so enticing, and when offered a taste of the cooked fruit, I gladly accepted! I could actually TASTE the fruit, and I woke immediately thereafter when I realized that my physical mouth was actually watering!!!

This OBE was so unique with the ability to actually use my five physical senses while OOB. I SAW clearly those people on the bank of the ditch from underwater, I HEARD the conversations, I TOUCHED the drapery, the leaves, and water dam, I SMELLED the food cooking, and I TASTED that cooked fruit!! Awesome!

111a) Full OBE account of VALIDATION success

9/13/09

As promised, here is the full account of my experience that wonderful night. Even though I have always known it is possible to ‘meet’ living persons in the astral (as Monroe and others have done), until you DO it yourself – there is always that little piece of doubt!!! No more for me!

I did my usual routine of going to the couch with the intention of having an OBE where I could meet up with a friend that was also going to try to get OOB the same night. For some added background, this friend is a fellow OBEr who lives in a different country (and time zone) than I am located and we have been communicating only via email of our experiences.

The likelihood of our ‘real life’ meeting therefore is quite minimal, so we decided to attempt to meet in the astral to see what would happen. We decided that he would attempt to travel to MY house, and I would try to stay here (instead of flying off all over the place like I usually do!) For me, this helps with the validation process, as you have NO preconceived notions of what to expect. I feel when you are meeting with those whom you are familiar; certain events can be biased according to what you already know.

I made the intention of meeting this friend, as well as wish to make it as ‘physical’ as possible – due to the fact that I felt the lower ‘physical vibration’, in keeping close to ‘real life’, would make it easier to remember details. (I have certainly had enough experience with total loss of memory recall in the higher vibrational state!)

On the couch, I became aware of vibrations when I noticed some sort of movement on my left, like someone or something was nearby. Feeling soft vibrations, I tried to intensify them and ‘willed’ them to increase, which they did!

At this time, I knew I was ready to exit, so I just sat straight up and stood up! I headed for the front door, but felt strong tugging, pulling me back toward the couch. I added an emphatic, “to the door!” knowing that the affirmation would get me there faster.

I passed through the door, feeling the change to cooler ‘air’ once outdoors. Strangely, I noted that I could also ‘feel’ the coolness of the cement below my feet! That was a very new physical sensation while OOB.

I am now standing there, feeling wide awake and fully aware! I remembered I wanted to go see my friend, so I jumped up to take off as I affirmed my intention. (And apparently forgetting I was supposed to stay put!)

Surprisingly, I found myself hanging by my arms on the small roof overhang that was above my head! I felt SO physical, because I noticed I could actually feel the muscle tension in my arms holding me up! I said, “What is this? Why am I so physical?” (also apparently forgetting I asked for it!! Lol)

I kicked what felt to be my physical legs up toward the sky as if dismounting, and then I just let go of my arms! I KNEW I was OOB, so there was no fear I was going to fall.

This started a long movement backward, a continuous falling sensation. During this long fall, it felt like my physical eyes were attempting to open, as if waking up, because I could see bits of sky and clouds above me. I’m feeling more and more ‘physical’, worried that I’ll wake completely if my eyes actually open fully! (of course, not realizing that if I am really opening them while on the couch, I shouldn’t be able to see the sky!!) Becoming fully physical, I realized I was on the couch, but in a semi-awake state.

Not wanting to lose the momentum, I thought I’d just try to relax back into the right state and try to exit again. I was surprised to see how easy it was to do! I sat up, and once again found myself OOB.

I knew the previous exit through the front door ended without any successful outcome, so this time I decided to exit through the side door. It was again difficult to move, and at one point I decided I didn’t have to go all the way to the side door, I could just duck out the side wall – which I did!!

I felt the texture change as I passed through to the outside, and found myself flying, but not moving well at all. I can see the trees, and moved higher to above tree level. I began to pick up speed and then was able to do my usual zooming around!

I am now traveling down the road next to my house, watching and knowing this is all so familiar. I ‘know’ my parents house is just down this road on the left, and when I saw it, became excited to think I’d go visit them. (In hindsight – remembering where I was on the road, in reality my parent’s house is NOT down this street as I saw it OOB)

As I neared the house, I felt a transition happening, and once again felt as though I was going to awaken. I realized as I got to the house that it was not their house as it is now. It appeared more ramshackle and worn, and the neighborhood was distressed and poor (not like real life). The transition continued, feeling heavier, and I found myself again awake on the couch.

This time, even though I felt I was awake, I said I have to get out again! I lifted my arm to the armrest above my head and pushed myself up! Surprisingly, I was again OOB! (I would have sworn I was physically awake – but something must have ‘told’ me I should try to get out!)

This time I move to my front yard and I was flying high! I recall looking down at my front yard and watching from above as a car entered my driveway. I immediately remembered I wanted to meet my friend and somehow I KNEW this was him!

I zoomed down to the car, and entered the passenger side as he was driving. I remembered as I neared the car, I could feel that transition of ‘physical-ness’ returning, and worried I was going to wake again!

Once in the car, my only memory is of reaching out to touch him, and I could actually feel it! The experience ended very quickly with my return to the couch in a semi-awake state.

I again didn’t want to get up, and I could still hear some odd noises going on within the room, so I tried pushing myself back up off the couch!

Finding myself out again, I recall I asked if I could help someone, as I always like to do something constructive while OOB, as well as have my fun!

This time, before I could leave the room, I heard female voices laughing and giggling. I asked, “who’s here?” and the girl’s voices got quiet. I asked again, “is anyone here?” and following the voices, entered the area where my real life bathroom is.

I found three young girls (ages late teens, early 20’s) all undressed and laughing. I saw two girls in an old fashioned claw foot white tub, and one standing along side it, behaving very immature and silly. (I even recall looking at the tub and remarking, ‘wow, what a nice old-fashioned tub – similar to my grandmothers!)

I asked, “why are you here? what’s going on?” and the one girl responded with something about being so bad they “don’t deserve to go on further” (?). The silliness continued, and I said, “that’s enough now, it’s time to move one, let’s go!”

With that I helped pull one girl out of the tub, and went to get the other one, but found her completely submerged under the water! I said, “look she’s in trouble!” and pulled her up out of the water as she gasps for air. (I had the distinct feeling that these girls were playing with me, as I ‘knew’ there was no need for air!)

I pulled the plug and watched as the water drained out of the tub. I said once again, “come on, it’s time to move on” and with that left the room.

I moved down the hallway, expected to see the rest of my house as usual. At the end of the hall, however, I unexpectedly turned into a huge well-lit room (one that is NOT there!). It was brightly lit, with yellow/gold accents, and a golden carpet. It felt as though it was a very posh, elegant studio of sorts, with plush chairs lining the entire circumference of the room. In the center was an easel with a square frame and drawing on display. This made me think that an artist lived there and I moved to the far wall where a beautiful desk was located.

A man entered the room from behind the desk, his head turned away from me so that I did not see his face, as if he was speaking with someone behind him. He wore a white shirt and suspenders and appeared to be in his 40’s or 50’s. I wondered if this individual could also be my friend that I wished to meet with!

Without warning, I started an immediate pullback, and woke fully back on the couch. I forced myself to wake because I knew if I didn’t record at this point, even more details were going to be lost!

As for the verification, his version was with much less detail, but in his words: “I’m afraid it was rather fleeting…or at least, my retained memories were! Basically, I was driving a car, with you as passenger….I didn’t think that we were in the states, but now that I think back, you were sitting on my right hand side, so we can’t have been here (where the driver sits on the right!). I have just an impression of where we were….there was greenery outside.” (There is lots of ‘greenery’ around my house, with shrubs, forests, and meadows!)

This was enough validation for me – even though it may not be for others, I’m very satisfied!!

111) VALIDATION of a meeting!! I'm so excited!

I just have to post here to share my excitement at the latest OBE that I had just this morning...

I do not have the time right now to write it up in detail (but I will!), but suffice to say, I have NO DOUBT in my mind that I met up with an intended person! I have done this a few times, but the intended person would have limited or no recall of the experience except for 'generalized' feelings...

This time, we set up the plan that on the same night we would 'intend' to meet each other in the astral. He was to come to MY house and I was to wait for him here (as I am always flying off to other areas!! lol)

Upon discussing our experiences we have discovered a perfect match in location and events!

Without giving long boring details, I had a number of OBEs last night - and each time I would get out, I found myself experiencing more and more 'physical' sensations and events. This is difficult to explain, but even though I had no doubt I was out of body, I found myself questioning the experience at times because I was able to 'feel' physical textures and bodily sensations that I normally cannot.

In hindsight, I can see now that I was preparing for the meeting that we had set up, because I had 'intended' to have as much physical sensation as possible incorporated into it!

So, to get to the validation, my recall of the meeting starting with gettting OOB and flying around my front yard. I then saw a car drive into my driveway, and somehow knew it was him!! He was driving, and I flew down and entered the car where the 'physicalness' sensations returned!! I could reach out and feel the other person- and it was awesome!

However, it ended very quickly, with only memory of the 'physical'-ness and some conversation.

Upon discussion and comparing notes, the other person flabbergasted me by telling me right out that he was driving a car to see me, and that I entered the car and spent just a 'short time' with him!! To me that's four hits - the car, he's driving, coming to me and being with me, and a short time!

Although there isn't a lot of detail here, it is SO validating for me to even have these same facts that were correlated!

Now many will question this validation, but I have to say - that there is not much in the astral that will be 100% validated by anyone who is NOT a part of the experience! Doubts and questioning of the event is allowed, so I do understand if this is not enough 'validation' for them.

However.......I have NO DOUBT.......:)...........and I'm thrilled to say it was a success in my book! It CAN be done!!!

(See next blog post for the complete OBE!)