71) Helping in Hospital

With this experience I must apologize in advance as I feel I lost most memories of exactly what I was doing, yet still retain the wonderful feeling and knowing that I was having the time of my life doing it!

You will notice the number of times I use 'feelings' in this section - as this was an OOBE that was mostly based on my feelings and emotions. Perhaps it is also why the information was so easily lost upon fully awakening - words just are not adequate to properly describe all that was felt and done.

I also understand that 'higher level' actions and emotions are not easily recalled by the conscious physical mind, and yet another reason the details may have been lost so quickly.

Usually my word association technique works well with most long experiences, however, even the signal words were lost in this one - possibly due to the false awakening at the end!

Anyone have any ideas how to remember the less tangible/emotional/feeling aspects of an OOBE?

9/01/08

I went to bed with the intention of using ‘Inward Now!’ if I had the chance to get OOB. I became aware of the ‘floating’ feeling once again, and knew I could just roll out.

Again it was so heavy, with the strong tugging and pulling back to body sensation while I tried to move across my living room from the couch I was sleeping on. I remember getting just through the front door and deciding I was far enough away to just do the ‘Inward Now!’ affirmation.

I was not disappointed in that I immediately felt the familiar backward black tunnel falling sensation, and enjoyed what felt like a long time of rapid backward movement. I almost felt like you were on a completely dark rollercoaster, yet one with a very gentle, smooth ride.

When the movement stopped, I once again found myself getting OOB from the couch (actually a common happening anymore). This time, however, as I stood, there was no heaviness or tugging, and I was surprised to find I had someone there with me!

With my ‘go with it’ attitude, I saw that she was helping me to get ‘dressed’ in something. I could physically feel her hands on my arms and shoulders, helping me to pull on some sort of covering, having my hands and arms in first and open in the back. (In hindsight, I can see that this is very similar to the sterile surgical gowns I ‘dress’ in regularly at work in the hospital)

I felt as though I was ‘being prepared’ for going someplace, and while getting ‘dressed’ I remember asking her, “How come I can’t see anything?” as it was total blackness. I did not get an answer, but my vision opened up to allow me to see that I was still within my house, yet was still unable to see the female who was assisting me.

Once dressed, I knew I was to follow her through my dining room to the far right corner. (I do feel there was communication with her, but not with words, so there is no ‘recall’ of them.) Watching her disappear through the wall there, I also knew that I was going to do the same to follow her, which I did without a concern.

From this point on, I have only limited recall, but will give the few highlights I do remember. On my recording, I can hear how distressed I am that I cannot remember all that I did, because I felt it was something so wonderful!

The first place I remember going was to the rooftop or building with an open area to the sky. It was nighttime and I was there with ‘Maryanne’, a black woman who was deep in conversation with me. I recall looking up to the night sky and seeing such beautiful star formations! Nothing like I have ever seen before! I remarked how beautiful they were, as instead of individual points of light, there were ‘clusters’ of stars in various shapes all over the sky! I recall her saying, ‘we call that one the Sphinx’ as she pointed to one, and I responded, ‘yes, I can see why’.

I only recall how pretty the night sky was to look at there, and the fact that part of our conversation dealt with Maryanne telling me something about Africa and how she was comparing her roots there to this other life she had lived. I have no further recall, but know it was a long, deep conversation I had with her.

My next recall is the one I felt most disappointed about NOT remembering the details. I was with these two young boys, in a ‘hospital-type’ (feeling) environment, and having a wonderful time interacting with them. They were both about 5 years old, and I felt I was helping them in some way, taking care of them. I picture them as sitting up on top of some area, and we were talking and moving about, but again, no details. There was also this feeling of MY learning something there, yet that is all I am left with.

At one point, I heard a phone ringing in another room, and ‘felt’ someone tell me “you go ahead and answer the phone” with the additional feeling that it was not an ordinary phone, so I’d have to look for it. I recall looking at shelving with knickknacks of some sort on it, wondering which of these items might be the ringing phone I was supposed to answer! I had the feeling it might have been a ‘doll’ I was supposed to find, but am not sure.

A woman comes up to me in this other room and is talking to me. She said to me, ‘you know you can only be here a short time’ and she mentioned something about meeting my parents here. I became slightly concerned because I knew both my parents are still alive, and thought perhaps this meant they were going to be ‘in spirit’ for me to meet them. I was assured this was not the case and recall being told I ‘had to go back…couldn’t be there that long…’ and I said, “yea, I know….” with the understanding at the time that staying there any longer may cause me to lose even more memories!

(In hindsight, however, perhaps I could not stay there any longer because shortly after I completely awoke and recorded this experience, my ‘on call’ beeper went off for an emergency at the hospital where I work!)

After realizing I had to go, I immediately felt the same backward black tunnel falling sensation and found myself awake and fumbling with the recorder. Unfortunately, in hindsight, I realize this was another false awakening because I was in a chair, at work, with coworkers around me asking me questions and handing me things to distract me!

I am determined to get the experience recorded, trying to remember my ‘key’ words I used to associate with the experience, and all the time getting interrupted by a coworker! She was handing me a pocketbook-like item with a small blinking light on it, indicating I had a message waiting. I felt, at the time, this was an intentional delay in my recording the experience so that I would forget many details!!

I slowly became completely aware of my ‘real’ body on the couch, and attempted to record what few details I have here. There was really a big loss of memory with this experience, and I am truly distressed to think how wonderful I felt during the time, yet cannot write it sufficiently here to share that emotion with everyone.