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Thursday, December 27, 2007

36) Negative Energy & More Firsts!

I was having a hard time getting into the stage of total relaxation, as my visualization and affirmations were drifting off and I was not focusing as well as I usually can. I remember getting to the soft vibrations stage a time or two, but would always become more aware and wake up.

I finally became a bit exasperated and said to ‘anyone’ out there, that I need help! (Of course, I always make a point to ask for help/guidance from those who are “at or above my level of development” and use the white light visualization for protection as you don’t want just ‘anyone’ helping! lol)

Well, something must have worked, because I then found myself out of body, feeling that strong pulling sensation telling me I needed to move away from myself!

The first part of this experience is poorly recalled, as again, when you transition from this experience, you immediately can feel the ‘memories’ fading quickly.

Just to share what I do, at the very end when I can feel the ‘pulling back’ and the fading of memories, I quickly make one word associations with as much as I can recall to imprint my waking consciousness. You can actually feel a difference in awareness levels, a transition that is moving to a more ‘grounded’ state of mind. (Words just can’t describe these feelings accurately!)

For this experience, I was imprinting in my mind the words, couch, dark energy, move, offices, blackness up, etc. They really don’t make a lot of sense to anyone else, but to me, each word created a spark of memory recall for each scene.

Then, upon coming to more awareness, yet still too groggy to move any part of my body to grab the recorder, I tried to ‘fade back’ further into the experience to recall some of the beginning parts.

I was then able to retrieve bits and pieces of the beginning of the OOBE, but unfortunately, not specific details. Thankfully, for this experience, the best part was near the end and so amazingly profound that I have a clear memory of the event.

So, onward with the great experience!

From my word associations, there was something in the very beginning about ‘bubbles’, but I have no recall what that was all about! I do remember it was the tiny white foamy type bubbles, but how they fit into this experience, I do not know!

Initially upon getting out, I remembered again that I was hoping to connect with a friend, so I took off looking in all these different rooms that appeared. The first few rooms were very similar to my current house, but arranged in a way that it appeared 15 years ago before renovations. I don’t have a lot of recall as to what I did, but I do remember I somehow ‘knew’ what was to be found in the next room, as I could see into it before I ‘phased’ into it.

This entire experience was with such clarity, as there was NO blindness associated this time! I do remember thinking, “wow, I can see so well!”, and the one time my vision dimmed, I used ‘clarity now!’ to regain full abilities.

I believe I was so caught up in my investigation of the rooms that I totally forgot about finding my friend!

There were lots of rooms I went to and at one point, I thought ‘let’s see what its like to look down at myself’ and I remember seeing my furniture, knowing I should be able to see myself. I saw the couch, but not myself on it, but again, I knew it was something that I didn’t want to really dwell on anyway so I moved on.

The next recall I have is traveling very, very fast, straight up into blackness with starry points of light passing by for a long, long time. I was zooming straight up, like a rocket, not sure where or how it started and unaware of where I was going.

Now at some point I realized I was with this family riding in the back left seat of a car. The car was an older model (1950’s?), with three or four family members in the car with me. Sitting next to two teenage girls with an adult in front passenger seat, there was a young girl driving.

I started talking to the girls next to me (I somehow ‘knew’ I was their grandmother!) and yet I also knew I was me!

So I am asking them, “Where are we? Who am I?” and other such questions…and the girls are finding it extremely funny that ‘grandma’ suddenly went ‘senile’ and is asking these strange questions!!

I never did get an answer to my questions, I just remember riding in the back seat, feeling ‘myself’ within this other body, and wondering what am I doing here? It was an unfamiliar area, in a poor neighborhood, on some back roads, and the words ‘St Louis’(?) came to mind. All I remember clearly is the fact that the girls were having a lot of fun with my confusion!

It was at this point that I became aware again that I was reclining on a couch, as I really was, but it was not this particular couch. Again, I think it was to make me aware that I was indeed ‘someplace else’ but yet still in body….

There suddenly (and frightfully!) appeared this moving dark energy that was pushing me down the couch, moving quickly in front of me! It was like waves of moving energy, full of anger and/or anxiety and made me a bit frightened and concerned! I knew this was not something I had ever encountered before and was not sure what to do!

Upon realizing my fear, something or someone gave me the ‘knowing’ that all I needed to do was to put up my ‘defense’ to deflect the energy which would allow me to interact with it.

Even at this time, I can still recall the sensation of negative energy waves that were radiating at me, something I have not ever ‘felt’ before! (Best description I can give you is that it felt like someone was pushing radiant heat waves at you!)

Then I see it was this older woman, telling me ‘move down the couch!, move from here now!’, waving and pushing, trying to get me to move….I could feel this strong, strong energy coming at me in waves. Such strong energy! It was a bit overwhelming at first. I knew I had to get over this hint of fear, immediately realizing that nothing can hurt me so all I needed to do was ‘deflect’ it and keep going!

I kept getting this strong dark insistence that ‘I have to move!!...can’t stay here!

Once I regained control of my feelings with the knowledge I was safe from anything that was going on, I calmed enough to ask, “What’s going on?” I knew it was important at that point to I determine what the ‘situation’ was so I could deal with it appropriately. (In hindsight, I think I realized at this point that this was someone who needed my help!)

I recall telling this ‘energy’ that I would be very happy to move for her, but before I did, she would have to do something for me. I said it would only be fair that we both agreed to do something that the other person wanted….

I could feel she stopped what she was doing to think about this and sat next to me in a chair, quietly, like she was mulling over my offer. I really wasn’t sure where I was going with this, but I did feel like this was the ‘right thing’ to say.

At least I got her to stop pushing me down the couch, and the blasts of energy and anxiety stopped long enough for me to see this male figure coming out of the back room doorway, saying in a calm, comforting voice, “Now Rose, that seems like a great idea to me….she will do something for you, and all you have to do is get up out of the chair and come with us! I think that makes a lot of sense! She’s willing to help you out!”

The woman became very quiet, like she was considering my offer, so I said, “yes Rose, I’ll even help you get out of the chair, come on!” So I got up, reached out my hand to her, and she became this entirely different ‘feeling’ person, a different energy, as she also reached her hand out to me and I was surprised that I could feel her take my hand!

The male figure that was there with us started talking to her like he was an old friend, putting his arm around her, and walking her toward the doorway in the back of the room that he came out of.

I could see into this doorway a group of individuals waiting there, and I walked with them up to the door. I knew that I was not to go inside. I felt such a sense of completion at this time…thinking “wow, did I really do what I think I just did?!??!”

I went back to the couch, sat down, and remember another woman coming over and telling me what a good job I just did…’you did some good work’…which made me feel rather good about myself…

Now this same couch became a sitting area for a busy office-like open waiting area (alcove of sorts) where people are walking by all the time. I could see a woman in the chair across from me, concerned, because she’s waiting for someone to come and was concerned that he didn’t remember to bring his favorite pencil/pen(?) he had to have with him. It didn’t feel like she needed help, but was just concerned…and I could see a lot of people just outside the tall glass windows who were lining up for some sort of processing…

The very last part of the experience involved my flying over city streets, as my word associations bring back the fact there was lots of people, a bus parked somewhere, and a modern day train engine that somehow figured into this experience.

I believe I made myself ‘awaken’ at this point as I wanted to recall the ‘retrieval’ that happened earlier, before too much more went on that would make me forget!


I will add more to this commentary as I get feedback from others, but for now, I want to point out my 'firsts' here. This was the first time I EVER encountered any type of negative energy, and it was so unsettling at first that it took me quite by surprise! Such strong waves of radiating's just so difficult to describe in words!

Thankfully, I'm glad to know it was a successful encounter, and again, that boosts my confidence greatly! Knowing what to expect, how to deal with it, is such a comforting thought. Putting up 'defenses' to deflect the energy, and sending out warmth and love to the negativity works, just as I've been told!

Also, it was a first for me to feel myself 'inside' that body of the, really an unusual sensation to feel! I was not concerned at all, except for the fact that I wanted to know where I was and no one wanted to tell me!

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