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Thursday, February 21, 2008

47) Moon Watch OOBE

2/21/08

I actually didn't know it was a lunar eclipse night, but I did know it was an 'important' full moon for some reason!

When I went to bed last night, I made a point of noticing how bright the moon was and that if I was to 'get out', I'd like to see how it looked from an OOB perspective....and guess what, I did!

It again, wasn't much in the sense of doing things, but I did consciously remember that I wanted to check out the moon!

Here's the experience:

I intended to ‘travel’ and having moved to the couch as usual, I did my usual energy raising and visualizations. I became aware first of a false awakening involving my daughter coming to the couch and talking to me about all sorts of random stuff, and not being sure if it was ‘real’ or not.

I then felt intense buzzing vibrations, much more than usual, and I knew I it was a false awakening and I could just climb out. Getting out though was not as easy as usual, having to pull myself out, kicking arms and legs to stand upright.

I felt very heavy, and it was very dark (as usual), and I found moving was difficult. While out, I thought I heard my daughter come down the hallway toward the bathroom and I thought it’d be interesting to follow her back to her bedroom. Moving again was difficult and the ‘clarity now’ affirmations were minimal in clearing my vision and ability to move.

I gave up trying to follow her and headed for the front door. Moving again was slow, and I tried to remember to ‘feel’ the change in texture as I exited it, but was not able to. It remained very dark, and I found myself outside, unsure of where I was!

Somehow I became aware of being up in a tree, as I could feel the sharp branches poking into me! It was quite a ‘physical’ sensation and very unusual to have. It felt like a pine tree, with the short little needles and spikes poking, and remembering I have these trees in my front yard, I figured I was just outside the house so I’d just shimmy down the trunk to the ground.

At this point I remembered that I wanted to check out the full moon. Looking up, I could see the moon in a distance, behind striated layers of clouds, and marveled at how beautiful and bright it was!

Having just read about opening your abilities to communicate by Leland, I tried to look for anyone to communicate with. I remember trying to be open to receiving but nothing was around. I still felt very heavy, a ‘low’ level of energy feeling and just faded back to awareness on the couch. Despite not ‘doing’ anything, I feel at least I did get to soak in the moonlight as I had wanted, and also remembered to try to be more open to any possibility of communication and receiving.

A second part to this experience happened shortly after returning. I became aware of being in a small room (hospital-like) and once again fumbling with my voice recorder. (However, the recorder I had in my hand was MUCH bigger than IP and had large buttons and dials). I was having difficulty in getting the recorder to shut off (I could hear my voice talking) as I was concerned I’d wake my husband who was sleeping in the bed in this room.

I became aware of someone standing at the doorway and hollered out, “Is someone there? Can I help you?” I could sense a presence there and followed her to the hallway. It was an older woman with disheveled grey hair in a nightgown. My first impression was that this was a mentally ill patient that I had possibly taken care of years ago.

I remember I kept repeating, “Can I help you? Do you need some help? Can I do something for you perhaps?” She said something like “perhaps it’s you that needs the help!” and my impression was that it was her way of saying ‘leave me alone, I don’t need any help.’ I followed her for a short distance as she walked away, and I was so aware I was not able to do anything to help her. At that point I faded back to the couch.

So this experience allowed me a few positive points: My ability to create an intention prior and follow through with it in the OOBE, to remember to 'look for' someone to communicate with (unsuccessfully it seems), and possibly to again try to help others with another unsuccessful assistance attempt.

Monday, February 18, 2008

46) Another Attempt to Connect

2/17/08 am

This was a relatively short experience and one that didn't 'feel' as profound as my previous, but I'm still sharing it as it was 'new' in a few respects.

Again, I had decided I'd like to try to 'connect' with my friend in the astral and so had that intention upon sleep.

The night started with a false awakening, thinking I had awakened in bed with the TV playing (which is very unusual for me- so I should have realized it was a false awakening at that point, but I didn't) and thought I heard my husband come home from a late dinner appointment. Waking shortly thereafter, I realized neither event had really occurred.

When I awoke later, at 3:33 to be exact, I went to the couch where I usually do my traveling, so as not to be disturbed by my husband who had come home in the meantime.

At this point I remember I had a series of rather unusual dreams, but they appeared to be 'work-related' so I didn't record them. (I really didn't want to get out of the 'feeling' I was in, so that was another major reason I didn't - yes, I know....ALL experiences need to be recorded! I do try....)

But I do still recall one segment that was unusual, and I didn't record. It had to do with both my grandmother (who is alive and well at age 93!) and Samara, my new granddaughter. It seems I was taking care of both of them, and they were 'put to bed' in the same bed to sleep.

I then was going to 'travel' myself and remember thinking about how I used the visualization of a rocking hammock to initiate separation at one time. Using this visualization of a rocking 'red' hammock, I actually go to the point where I knew my astral legs were out and I was buzzing. BUT, at the point of my anticipated separation, there was such a strong feeling that Samara was in danger! (This was almost like an OBE within a dream - different yet familiar feelings)

I very reluctantly, but decidedly, stopped the separation process to go check on her in the bed. Thankfully, I did, because with the lack of room in the bed (due to her great great grandmother's position) she was in danger of falling off the edge of the bed!

I remember at that point my grandmother woke up, and got up to help me find something I had dropped at the end of the bed while getting Samara, and I was suprised to see how agile she was.

My grandmother told me about a 'dream' she had that she was able to 'talk' with someone she longed to see again (I can't remember who it was), so I told her that it WAS possible to do this, and that she should go back and try to reconnnect with this person.

So, anyway, the next recall was that I again was getting the buzzing and separation sensations but this time being aware I was on the couch. (This time it was 'for real' in the sense it was not within a dream sequence as previous)

I remember just sitting up and climbing out, but over the back of the couch instead of standing along side as I usually do.

Because I climbed over the back, I felt disoriented and 'blind' as usual, but knew enough I had to move away. So I said 'to the outdoors!' (again unusual, as I almost always say 'to the door!') and found myself moving quickly to my front yard.

I recall as I passed through the front door, there seemed to be 'chime' or musical note I heard - again unusual.

Now I'm standing in the front yard, and still having difficulty 'seeing'. I am still a bit disoriented for some reason, and feeling like I'm in a hurry or have to do things very fast.

I can't recall what to say to 'see' better, but I know I want to go somewhere. So, in my hurry, I decided not to wait until my vision clears (it's improved but still not very clear) and take off. (Never have I had this 'hurry-hurry' feeling before!)

At this time, I remember that I really wanted to "find (friend)" and repeated this over and over as I gave a small jump. Just as I started to move up and backwards (as usual), I heard my brother's voice call out. It struck me that maybe I should go investigate what he is calling about, but my desire to "find (friend)" overrode any further thought of it.

So, I'm traveling up and backward into darkness, yet still 'seeing' forward as my house (which wasn't exactly my house in appearance) and trees are fading in front of me.

I hear one word, whispered to me, as I was moving backward - 'Come!' - and I do not know who said this!

The trees were in silhouette against a red-orange sunset as I moved backward and that was the last I recall seeing as I became fully awake on the couch.

Friday, February 15, 2008

Commentary for Experience #45

I just wanted to share some views from Kiauma, thank you for your thoughts!

KIAUMA writes:

Leland talks about the ultimate 'purpose' of it all. He says creation comes from the Divine, where it falls down to the gross physical level, then rises back to the divine as differentiated consciousness. Our souls are that 'differentiated' (individual) Divinity that raises back up.

I see all of your dreams supporting that in a variety of metaphors.

From the 'warnings' of the first dream ( not published here), to the hospital -> New building setting of the second dream, to the direct supporting experience of the third experience.

One key metaphor that keeps recurring is the one of food. Food is, literally, a sustenance. We are what we eat, so we must be careful what we eat, depending on what we want to be! You will also notice that entry to the new wing in dream #2 was made difficult by "dog food" in and around the entrance - indeed!

Also in dream #2 you were able to 'feed' one of the entities something to 'help' him. This is significant because of the dream setting, especially in relation to everything else in the dream, strengthening the link between 'food', sustenance, and the self.

Often, when we dream of a building, it is metaphorical of our self, or at least can be looked at that way (dreams often have layers of meanings, but I will concentrate on this one). Notice it is the 'old' part of the hospital that harbors the negative entity - this could symbolize some element of your shadow self, something to be 'left' if you are able to move into the building that is 'under construction'...?

In short - keep doing what you are. You are at a critical transition in perspectives. Be careful what you 'eat' - the information and worldviews you allow yourself to consume, as your hard won spiritual views and values could still be weakened by cynicism, negativity, or other shortsighted, careless, or outright mean views.

Sunday, February 10, 2008

45) Two Part OOBE - Gratitude

2/10/08

Both of these experiences happened the same night - with only enough time for me to record Part one before lapsing into Part two!!

I also want to say that I did 'request' some help from the Universe with regard to my recent feelings of being overwhelmed with my IP life and fear of not having time to attend to my 'other life' OOB....so I guess this was to show me that I still am 'working' hard, both IP and OOB!

I don’t even know how to begin to explain this first ‘dream’ event, and I recall I was not even going to record it as it didn’t feel as though I would be able to properly describe what I could remember. There are some details, yet so much was lost to translation and awakening. However, I am SO glad I did record it as it was an important prelude to a most wonderful OOB experience!

PART ONE -

The first recall I have is that I am going to all these different rooms helping people in this building that felt like a ‘hospital-type facility. I especially recall two rooms where these ‘entities’ lived – I call them entities because I knew they were not ‘real people’ and yet they were not spirit form either. Actually, with both of these, I don’t recall any shape or form whatsoever associated with them.

The first room was described as a ‘haunted’ room (best translation I can give) where people would go to talk to this one corner where such strong ‘energy’ lived. I knew that it was ‘more’ than I could deal with, yet I wanted to keep trying to do something to help.

Other people were allowed to go there to try to work with it, so when I asked to see this room, I remember someone was standing with me at the doorway of the room. I could feel tremendous negative, dark, strong energy pulsating from the corner of that room, the same ‘radiant heat’ type waves that I had felt from a previous OOB experience with negative energy. I remember I tried to communicate with it but felt bad when I couldn’t do anything to help and had to walk away.

I went on to other people and other rooms that I could help, and the only other room I remember is where this ‘invalid-type’ long-term chronic entity resided. I can’t really described exactly what it was except that I felt it was one who was solely dependent upon the services of the workers there at the facility to survive.

With this entity I was able to help, as I remember being able to give him some ‘food’ of sorts and alter his nourishment in some way that I felt would help. It was at this time that I realized I‘m there in this ‘doctor/nurse’ type role and was assisting the residents of the facility.

The workers who were there were SO thankful for my presence there and my help. I felt I was just stopping by and offering my assistance, yet they were so appreciative of what I was doing (I only wish I could recall exactly what I was doing there!)

I remember that just as I was leaving this one building where the ‘dark entity’ lived, I wanted to stop by his room just to say goodbye. I remember peeking in the doorway, being polite, and saying “I just wanted to say goodbye, I’m leaving now”. I felt a short little ‘blast’ of energy come at me, as I attempted one more time to ‘break through’ to it. I doubted it would work, but just had to try one more time before leaving.

I started to walk back into another building that was still under construction that was felt to be an ‘extension’ of the existing building I had just left. Upon entry to this building I remember meeting some workers who were leaving for the day, who hollered for me and wanted to say good night and thanks again for all my help. I hollered back ‘you’re welcome’ and had such a wonderful satisfied feeling of having been some sort of help there.

Before walking into the new building, I had to step around and step over stuff that looked like ‘dog food’ of some sort on the ground, and made a funny comment to the worker there about how difficult it was to get inside this other building, but it wasn’t impossible.

I am accompanied by a doctor I work for (in real life), and felt like I was on his level, which I believe was just to show me what capacity I was there in. Other people walked in and I attempted to tell them that the individuals they were looking for were in the other building, as this one was still under construction.

I left there with such a light, jovial, satisfied and contented feeling – happy knowing I was able to be of assistance to these individuals.

PART II - Near Physical OOBE

I was on the couch and became aware of the light buzzing sensation, being aware I was about to get OOB. I felt my legs lift and move, and then just rolled out off the couch and was standing there. As usual, it was dark, but yet I knew to say ‘to the door’ at which time I was immediately at the door, with a ‘lighter’ sensation having moved away from my IP body.

Not remembering what I wanted to do, I then said ‘to the stoop!’ which brought me outside on the front porch stoop. I said ‘awareness now!’ and was amazed at the clarity of vision I had. I stood there, admiring my same front yard, at night, but so much prettier because everything had such a beautiful ‘glow’ about it.

Again, I figured I’d just ‘take off’ and bent down to do the usual little ‘jump’ to start flying. As I do this, I hear off to my right, the most beautiful voice I have ever heard call my name, apologize for interrupting me, and asked if I could talk with her for a little while. I was taken aback and stunned at her ‘presence’ that I was actually frozen in mid-take off stance!!! lol There was such a strong feeling of peace, love, and expansiveness feeling emanating from her!

I never asked her name, just somehow knew who she was. There was no ‘form’ associated with her so I could not give any description of her features. We sat together and she said she wanted to talk with me about my ‘work’ and where I had been. She was so appreciative and grateful for the work that I had done (now I’m associating this with my just previous ‘dream’ experience with the ‘hospital’ facility) and wanted to express her thanks, but it was in such a profusely powerful way that made me feel so good!

She said that I had exceeded all expectations and with a smile said she just would like to ‘send me back there to work – forever’ because I did such outstanding work. I told her that I enjoyed doing it just as much, but felt she already knew that.

She said, “I do want to tell you though that the ‘vegetative one’ (best translation I could make) did ‘move on’ and would not be there” when I went back. But I did such good work and there was so much more do to there. The grateful, appreciative feeling was so immense, coming both from of us during this conversation.

She’s now giving me these papers to read, to take with me, and I remember asking, “am I going to have these when I wake up?” knowing that I was OOB and could not bring them back. I was wondering how I could get this ‘reading’ material back with me when she says, “well, I’m hoping you are recording this”.

Sitting next to her, I knew I had my recorder in my hand, and am trying desperately to put it back together as it had fallen apart in pieces! Now I’m upset that I can’t get it put back together fast enough!!

At some point she’s telling me so many other things, but all I remember is seeing the words to a short little song that I recall knowing from somewhere. She started to sing this short little song to me, in the most wonderfully sweet voice that I have ever heard! It was like ‘soda’(?) names, rhythmic-like words similar to “Thank Pop, Thank God, Thank Rock…..” with another line I don’t remember – it just made me feel SO good!

Off to my right, my best friend comes up and starts talking about how ‘good I am’, how I give so much of my time to others, and such things. She telling this ‘woman’ (and myself) how I do so many things, including things I do that I shouldn’t do – like eating shrimp…(this is a standing joke with my friend and myself – as I am severely allergic to shrimp and can find it in the most unusual places – having a major reaction that she usually has to deal with! lol)

The woman did say I had to take care and be careful about what I do eat. I felt I was being told to be more aware of what I am eating and how I am eating.

The most awesome part of this entire experience is the feelings that I had throughout the experience. Such gratitude, happiness, and peacefulness that surrounded everything just cannot be put into words!

(See next blog post for commentary)

Friday, February 1, 2008

44) Pulling Pieces Together OOBE

2/01/08 6:30am

I went OOB again this morning after awakening, just for a short travel, but again it was with a new transition to it. I really think now, that all the 'pieces' are coming together - the 'false awakenings', the out-of-sync feelings, the repeated questioning of 'is it real' or is it IP? - the knowing of what it 'feels' like (I guess my energy perceptions...)

Driving home from graduate school last night, late and it's dark and a good 30 minute ride - I had the time to think, and made the observation that 'gee, this could easily be a prelude to OOB' - BUT - it is such a different 'feel' to my questioning that I had NO concern at all that it was IP. (Don't worry, I'm not becoming confused as to what 'state of consciousness' I'm in!)

I just used it as an example to compare to my OOB 'questioning' of reality - which made a lightbulb go on in my head. There IS a difference in 'feeling' to tell when you are IP or OOB - and the mere fact that you actually take a second to stop and 'question reality' will tell me that I AM ready to go out. (Is this making sense??)

By having all those false awakenings and real IP scenes in the prelude to OOBs actually helped me make this perception of consciousness easier now.

So, this morning I became aware I was doing something at my Mom's house outside, playing games with children and a ball - and ran to go get it when it went into the neighbors yard. At the point I was crossing the stone wall (that is there IP), I stopped for a second and wondered, "am I really here or not?" which immediately made me remember that anytime I'm questioning reality like that, to just try to 'take off' because I am usually OOB.

(I also figured if I wasn't I'd just jump and fall down - not too bad a price to pay for the chance to OOB!)

So I jumped, and took off! Such flying freedom again, I just wish you could be there too! I actually played around with the ball and as it came down, tried to catch it with my feet, upside down! lol

The next I remember I'm carrying this young girl - I related it to my daughter at age 3-4, yet it didn't look like her - so I'm actually thinking this may have been me (!) - is that possible? I'm showing her how to fly and how much fun it is - I even 'flipped' her over to show the freedom but she got scared so I stopped and apologized for the scare.

We went into a house with many room, but I can only recall the last room, an old attic type room with lots of 'fixtures' and 'stuff'. We were outside the door, peering in, and I'm telling her it's the 'astral room' with all stuff you use when you go to the astral.

We never went inside and the experience faded shortly thereafter - but one other thing I remember was that my 'talk' with the young girl was nonverbal (of course), yet was in an 'adult' language, not in a normal language you would use for a 3-4 year old.

COMMENTARY: Again with this experience, the transition was the new development for me. Becoming more sensitive to what I am feeling is my key to further travels.

As always, you wonder why you have such experiences as 'false awakenings' and confusing with perception while OOB, but in the end, you find the Universe has an orderly plan to put it all together for a very good reason! I am excited to know that I am progressing as planned, and am looking forward to even more wonderful experiences!

New Energy Perceptions Started

Lately my personal life has been so busy that I have found myself overly tired and overly stressed for a good part of the week. With this extreme tiredness, I also have had new sensations happening with my perception of energy movement.

Whether the extreme fatigue has caused me to lower my 'defenses' or I just get more 'sensitive' to this, I am not sure. But it takes very little now to feel that slight 'out-of-sync' sensation and energy movement when I close my eyes and relax just a little.

Actually, in seeing how things are changing a bit OOB, I believe this all fits - my ability to perceive energy differences has improved to the point where I am able to tell where my 'conscious' state is. This allows me a greater ease in transitioning to the other energy body when I so desire.

Perhaps I needed to have this very stressful week in order to 'awaken' my senses!

These experiences are happening much more frequently lately and yet Iam not really trying! This is a very, very busy time for me IP, andnow it seems a busy time OOB as well!

Balancing these two 'lives' is quite a challenge - yet I feel one is just as important as the other! It helps though, just to share these experiences and see what others may think of what's happening. It's exciting, but it's also very challenging to keep up with!! lol

43) New Perceptions to OOBE

1/31/08 5:30am

I was awake before the alarm time, and lying in bed worrying about the busy day ahead. Realizing this is such an unproductive waste of time to lie in bed doing, I told myself emphatically that the IP life will always be there, but the chance to go OOB will not!

So I mentally changed my 'focus', throwing aside all concerns and worries about the upcoming day (which in itself is no small feat for me to do!) and felt myself settling back into working on getting out.

I became aware I was in a chair (IP I was lying on my right side in bed), but leaning toward my right. My husband was talking to me about mundane things, and I remember thinking, ‘is this real?’ and at the same time looked out the window to see ‘time’ moving very fast.

Now what I ‘saw’ was the scenery moving past fast (as if in a car), but it registered quite normally as ‘time’ moving along, and I remarked at how fast time is moving lately. (The scenery was trees and hills in full autumn beauty)

This then coalesced into my thinking, “hey I could ‘pretend’ I’m in a car with the ‘time’ moving by”, and I realize I am now sitting in a captain’s chair in a van, while it’s moving . I’m still on my right, watching the scenery move by, and realize that my vision is slowly ‘clouding’ up, and the colors are fading to black and white.

So at the point where I can only ‘see’ clearly through a small center hole, I remember that this is the same ‘view’ I get with ‘astral vision’, so I say, “hey, I must be ready to get out!” With that, my left leg starts moving all around, up and over by my right side (MUCH more malleable than it is IP!) and that tells me, ‘ok, great! I’m getting out!’

So I then move my arms as well, feeling just a bit stuck, but then give a huge ‘heave-ho’ with my head and rest of body, to find myself standing quite comfortable outside of it!! Initially my vision again is dark, but this time it quickly clears and I still see the ‘scene’ of the inside of a van.

I move to the side door, bend down to look out but realize I don’t have to do that to go out!! So I just ‘move through’ the side of the van door, stopping half way out to look back inside! I don’t really ‘feel’ that sensation of moving through an object as I have when OOB in my house, but the feeling of being ‘out’ is SO crisp and clear!

I move to an area with two trees, saying ‘to the tree!’ to get there fully and I end up in the tree limbs, feeling the leaves and hugging the tree. Now I have to explain here that this out of body ‘feeling’ I am having is SO wonderful and SO ‘crisp’ (can’t really explain why it’s so different) that I am just ecstatic about being given the ability to do this! I remember exclaiming to anyone who wanted to hear, ‘thank you SO MUCH for letting me do this!’

While I’m in the tree, a young girl (short dark hair, dark eyes) is with me, and I get the feeling that she was with me all the while. I feel very comfortable talking with her, and she is very pleased that I am here with her as well.

I remember we talked about ‘our’ work in the critical care unit, and she made some profound statement that I really can’t recall exactly, but at the time, made perfect sense. Something about you can take the nurse out of critical care, but can’t take the critical care out of the nurse??! (Which would make sense, actually, with my work changes)

So now she is inviting me to ‘breakfast’ (?) at her place, and we head for a table that is set up with four places. I can see the plates, some with food, and I remark how it’s a bit ‘late’ for breakfast but she tells me that it’s never to late to take advantage of someone who has shown up for a visit – or something like that.

I knew I was so pleased and happy to be there and that everything ‘felt’ so clear, crisp and perfect.

Unfortunately, I faded back to IP lying on the bed very quickly, and actually felt sorry that I ‘left’ her just as she was so anticipating my ‘visit’!!

COMMENTARY: This was really nothing in terms of travel, but everything in terms of how I was perceiving different energy feelings. Not only was the transition to OOB different for me, but the clarity and depth to the actual OOB was so different! No heaviness, no vision problems, and such profound feelings were felt throughout the entire experience. All new way of perceiving energy levels - at least that's what I'm thinking it is!